


Couples Therapy

by Fallen_Ark_Angel



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-11
Updated: 2015-09-11
Packaged: 2018-04-20 07:21:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 61,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4778540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fallen_Ark_Angel/pseuds/Fallen_Ark_Angel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After (sorta) helping Lucy and Natsu through a fight, Mirajane decides that she's perfect at not only putting people together, but also helping keep them together. So she enlists the aid of the reluctant Laxus in her fight to counsel every Fairy Tail couple. From Gajeel and Levy to Erza and Jellal, Mirajane's intent on helping them all! Laxus? Not so much.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

  


"I just think that I have a higher purpose."

"Uh-huh."

"I mean, who grows up wanting to be a barmaid?"

"Uh-huh."

"And I really think that I'm good at singing. Don't you?"

"Uh-huh."

"And I just love it so much!"

"Uh-huh."

"Not that I don't like it here, because I do."

"Uh-huh."

"And I love you, of course."

"Uh-huh."

"But I'm just meant to travel, you know?"

"Uh-huh."

"See the world."

"Uh-huh."

"I won't, like, cheat on you or anything."

"Uh-huh."

"…Laxus, are you even listening?"

"Uh-huh."

"Really?"

"Uh-huh."

"Oh." Mirajane giggled as she refilled his beer for him. He was just sitting there at the bar, headphones in, as he stared down at a newspaper. It had been a rather slow day which, as always, meant that the demon thought she could sit around and talk to him the whole time. Which was fine. That's what he had headphones for. "Just checking."

"Uh-huh."

"'cause I love you. Have I said that today?"

"Uh-huh."

"Oh, Laxus. You're, like, the best boyfriend ever. And I mean that. Ever."

"Uh-huh."

"You think tonight you wanna go out to eat?"

That made him glance up. "Something fancy or something cheap?"

"Which do you prefer?"

"Ch-" he stopped himself when he saw her face. "Fancy."

"Oh, Laxus! You and me are just so in sync, huh?"

"Uh-huh."

She was still blabbering on too when, suddenly, they were joined over at the bar by a weeping Lucy, that stupid white spirit of hers in her arms, trying to comfort her. Laxus glanced at her before turning his headphones up louder.

"Lucy." Just like that, Mirajane's attention was off her apathetic boyfriend and onto her sobbing friend. "What's the matter?"

"It's," she cried as Laxus tried to turn his music up even more. If it got too strident though, Mira would hear it leaking out and yell at him about his precious hearing or something. Right. Because to prove that someone needs their hearing, you make them lose it by yelling demonically at them. Okay. "Natsu."

"Natsu?" Mirajane repeated. "What did he do?"

"He-"

"Lucy!"

Just then, the guildhall doors burst open and Natsu came rushing in, his stupid cat flying along as well.

"No," she said as he came to sit down next to her. "Go away, Natsu. I don't wanna talk to you."

"But-"

"We're sorry," Happy said. "We just-"

"You either."

"What did I do?" the Exceed complained.

"You encourage him. You always encourage him. You-"

"Don't yell at Happy," Natsu said. "He didn't do anything. And neither did I. But…if we made you cry-"

"I don't wanna hear it, Natsu."

"What's going on?" Mirajane asked. "Guys?"

Laxus, knowing where the whole thing was headed and not wanting to be a part of it, got to his feet, taking his paper with him. He immediately went to sit down next to Freed, who was happily going over some sort of paper work or something.

"Laxus," he greeted. "What-"

"The demon," he sighed, "is annoying me."

"Ah, yes, Mirajane. Any man would be lucky to have her." Freed was nothing if not supportive.

Laxus wasn't in the mood.

"Have to remind myself of that everyday."

Even more so when it was decided upon when Lisanna showed up for the evening shift that they were going on a double date. He and Mirajane. With the Salamander and the weeper. Even the damn cat, because why not?

"We're going to fix them, Laxus," Mira hissed.

"But demon," he groaned when she came over to the table to tell him this. "I just wanna go out, eat a nice dinner, screw around when we get home, and then go to bed. Is that too much to ask?"

If her facial expression was anything to go by, it definitely was.

"We're doing this," she said simply. "And you can forget about that nice dinner."

"What do you mean? You said fancy. I got my taste buds all set to steak. Steak, Mira!"

"His taste buds are rather exquisite," Freed offered up. Mirajane just ignored him though.

"They can't afford to eat somewhere like we can."

"We? What's this we? I ain't ever seen you pay for a bill."

"Laxus-"

"No. It's not fair. Just because they're irresponsible and not awesome enough to take the good jobs don't mean I can't have my steak. I'm getting my steak."

"Not with us you're not. Now come on. Tell your friends all goodbye and let's go."

"I'm not telling them-"

"Bye, Laxus!" Freed grinned brightly. "Unless, of course, you would like me to accompany you and, well, keep you company. You are outnumbered, after all."

Meh. Freed…

Glancing around, Laxus found that Ever wasn't around and Bickslow was all caught up in bothering Lisanna as she kept bar. Sigh.

"Come on, Freed. Let's-"

"No," Mira said though the man jumped up regardless, leaving his precious papers behind. "No way, Laxus."

"Mirajane-"

"We're going out with Natsu and Lucy to help them through their hard time."

"How?"

"We're older, more experienced, hardly ever fight-"

"What do you call what we're doing right now?"

"Laxus-"

"And besides," he countered. "Freed's helping me through my hard time."

"What hard time are you-"

"The one you're putting me through by making me go out with them!"

"Do you," she began then, voice low, "or do you not wanna go home with me tonight, Dragon?"

"Well…"

"Then come on. And goodnight, Freed."

"For the record," the green haired mage said as the woman walked off. "If we were together, I would never threaten you with holding out on overnight visits."

"And," Laxus groaned following his girlfriend. "You're staying."

Lucy seemed really mad at Natsu when they took off. She walked ahead of them, with Mirajane, and refused to glance back at him. Though Natsu seemed concerned in the moment, Laxus knew all it would take is one little distraction, and he'd forget all about it.

"Say," he found himself whispering then to the Salamander, hoping that he could be that distraction. Then he and the demon could get on with their night. Alone. He was even willing to overlook the way she'd talked to him in front of Freed. Maybe. "Natsu, I bet that you and your stupid cat here would be real interested in hearing about how a few towns over there's gonna be this big eating contest tomor-"

"That's great, Laxus," Natsu cut him off though he didn't glance at the other man. "Hey, Luce, maybe I could just replace the-"

"Shut up."

"Lucy," Happy tried. "We-"

"Hey, Natsu. You up for a fight?" Laxus wasn't giving up. He needed to get the whole thing resolved before they got to the restaurant. He'd knock the damn Salamander out, the girl would flip, nurse him back to health, and he could-

"Laxus," Mira hissed, glancing back at him. Natsu wasn't even listening anyhow. He'd… Where had Natsu run off to?

They had been passing a few vendors and he returned quickly with a flower. Laxus would give him that, it wasn't beat up or nothing. Perfectly good rose. Happy snickered when he saw it, clearly thinking that everything would be all fixed after that.

"Here, Luce, I-"

"I don't want it."

Man, the Salamander must have really screwed up.

"Lucy-"

"No, Natsu. You always do that. You act stupid and then think that you can just do something small for me and I'll forgive you."

"In his defense," Laxus tried, not believing he really cared that much. "He's pretty stupid in general."

"Yeah, I'm- Hey." Natsu frowned at Laxus, but the man only shrugged.

"I don't want it," Lucy said once more, not even glancing back at the man. Sighing, he shrugged slightly before looking to Mirajane.

"Do you want it then?"

"I-"

"Natsu." That time Lucy did turn around, though it was just to glare at him. "Are you serious?"

"Wh- Oh, yeah, Mira's on a date with Laxus. That's rude, huh? I'll give it to Erza or Lisanna then when we finish up here."

"You are so dense."

"Thank you."

"That's not a compliment!"

He let out a long sigh then. "I don't know what you want from me."

"That's pretty obvious," Happy mumbled.

"You can't just give away the flower, Natsu," Lucy complained, looking back forwards again. Mirajane glanced back as well, though it was to look at Laxus. He shrugged. What did she want from him.

"You said you didn't want it!"

"That doesn't mean you can just give it away."

"Uh, yeah, Luce, it does. I bought it, you don't want it, I don't want it, Happy does-"

"Happy would like to be asked things instead of them just being decided for him, thank you," the Exceed spoke up.

"Do you want it then, little buddy?" Natsu was pretty beat down then. "Can I give it to him, Luce?"

"Whatever, Natsu."

"Here then. Be careful of the thorns, huh?" He handed off to the cat before going back to sulking. It was rare for him to get so down about something, but watching his relationship implode when, to be truthful, he couldn't even quite remember what he did to cause it was kinda disheartening to say the least.

Happy just snickered some more. Attempt five hundred and forty-eight to win over Carla would be complete soon enough. Sure flowers had never worked before, but you never knew unless you tried…dozens of times.

The rest of the walk to the restaurant was silent, but it was better that way, Laxus figured. Apparently, he was going to have to at the very least sit through a meal with the clowns and didn't wanna have to talk to them more than necessary.

At the table, no one spoke. And Happy just stood on it, looking over his rose for any imperfections.

"Hey, Natsu?"

"Hmmm?" He hardly glanced at him.

"Can I order  _anything_ on the menu?"

"Sure. Laxus is paying."

The Thunder God blinked. Mira had already confiscated his headphones, so he heard every word of that.

"Laxus is what?" the man asked.

"Well," Mirajane said. "I did tell you they couldn't afford to eat where we wanted. Don't make them feel bad that they couldn't even afford to eat here."

"We could," Lucy complained. "If Natsu didn't bankrupt us constantly."

"Me?" He was about done with her for the day. "You're the one that constantly needs to make rent payments. That's where all the money goes."

"I have to live somewhere, don't I?"

"I'm a homeowner," he pointed out. "I-"

"You're a shack owner at best."

"Hey-"

"I would never leave my apartment to go live there. No way."

"Uh, I don't think anyone invited you," Happy pointed out.

As Lucy gave the cat the stink eye, Mirajane looked across the four top table at her boyfriend, pleading for him to step in. He was still trying to figure out how he got stuck listening to another couple argue over stupid crap and would end up footing the bill too. What kinda sense did that make?

It didn't. It made none at all. Unless you were the demon and thought that your man was just made of money. And even if he was, that didn't mean it was hers. No way. Sometimes, when he was very rarely feeling up for, he might toss her his wallet and tell her to get a new dress or two, but that was the closest to any access she got to his bank account. But there she was, once again, just decided that she ran his finances or something.

"So," Mira tried after the waiter came around to take their orders. "I think it's pretty clear that you guys have some issues here and, well, maybe we can all talk it out and get passed-"

"Lucy is totally a tyrant and tries to tell us what to do all the time." Happy, annoyed that the woman kept glaring at him, clearly knew what he wanted to say. "And we won't take it anymore."

"I'm being a tyrant, Happy? If that's true, then you guys are invaders that are welcome to stop staying over at my apartment  _constantly_  any time you'd like."

"Well, we wouldn't like. So there."

"I think," Mira said slowly. "That things would go a little smoother, Happy, if you let Natsu and Lucy work this out."

"Which means," Laxus grumbled as he eyed the cat darkly. "To shut up."

"Laxus."

"I'm helping, Mira. Why else did you bring me here?"

"Why did you bring us here?" This question seemed to dawn on Natsu for the first time. Then, frowning at Lucy, he said, "Hey, I think they set us up or something."

"Dense."

"Stop calling me things that I don't know what mean!"

Laxus shut his eyes and took a deep breath. Maybe if they kept it up, the demon would take pity on him and, at the very least, give him his headphones back. Hopefully.

"Lucy,' Mirajane said slowly. "Natsu is sorta right. You shouldn't name call."

"Name call?" She made a face at Mira then. "Do you know what he did?"

"That's what she's tryin' to figure out," Laxus grumbled.

"I don't even know what I did," Natsu added.

"He took the pages of a new story that I was writing and wiped his filthy hands all over them and crumbled them up-"

"Oh, that's what this is all about?" Natsu looked to Mirajane. "Lucy always says to wipe my hands after I eat. So, me and Hap had just finished clearin' out her food of all the stuff we wanted to eat and I thought that I would do just that. But I couldn't wipe it on my clothes, could i? Then she'd call me sloppy. Again. So I used the next best thing."

"Next best thing?" Lucy made a face. "I have actual paper towels, Natsu! In the kitchen where, you know, you were having your little feast.'

"Paper towels, notebook paper. What's the difference?"

"There's a huge difference!"

"Just stop yelling," Laxus complained. "Sheesh. You're getting a free meal. Act a little appreciative by, gee, I dunno, not getting us kicked out?"

"I think," Mira tried again, "what Laxus is saying is that you, Natsu, were in the wrong, but Lucy, you can't be upset with him. We all know that he's very…literal."

"That is not what Laxus is saying," the man grumbled. "I'm saying that you're both idiots and I really don't care if you date or not. Just don't reproduce."

"Laxus," Mira warned as Happy giggled some more.

"No thanks," Natsu said. "I'm not big on vegetables."

"I said reproduce, not eat produce!"

"Oh, dear," Mira sighed, realizing for the first time that the whole thing might be a tad more complicated than she thought. Lucy and Natsu were everyone's favorite couple and, obviously, they loved one another, right? She thought that it would be a cinch to get them back on track, but apparently, that had just been wishful thinking.

Laxus' favorite couple, however, was him and Mirajane. Watching Natsu's relationship implode, while fun, was not heartbreaking in the least. All good things come to an end, right? And everyone grows tired of one another eventually.

Except him and the demon. They were…what's the word…perfect for one another. She could cook and clean and give head while he was just all around awesome. See? Perfection.

But anyhow.

"Are we only here," Mira began again, "because Natsu used your story for a napkin?"

"No," Lucy said, shooting Natsu another glare. He just sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. "Tell her, Natsu."

"Well… He glanced around. "Lucy was yellin' at us and stuff and I just… I'm right though, Lucy. You have to admit. I-"

"That's a horrible thing to say."

"What is it that he said?" Mira asked, clearly intrigued.

"Just that it was more fun," Natsu said with a shrug. "Before we were dating or whatever. And it was! So-"

"Then why are we even here?" Laxus complained. "Clearly, it didn't work out. Welcome to life, kiddies. Now scram. And demon, let's-"

"Because I was just angry," Natsu said. "I don't really think that, Luce. Things have been great since we started dating. These past few…however long it's been have been the best."

"Oh, whatever."

"It's true," he defended. "You're my best friend. We do everything together. And I hope that we keep doing them together."

"He  _loves_  you," Happy sang.

"Yeah. I do. And I'm sorry that sometimes I screw up. Or sometimes I make it seem like I don't. But you and Hap are the most important things to me. Along with eating, fighting, and having fun."

"When you really think about it and who he is," Laxus remarked. "You should kinda be honored to be on that list."

"Well, yeah, of course she's on the list," Natsu said. "Right behind-"

"Shut up, idiot," Laxus hissed. "Or do you not wanna make up with your damn girlfriend?"

"So, Lucy," Mirajane prompted. "Did Laxus and I fix everything?"

"What did you fix?" Laxus grumbled.

"Everything."

"Sure, demon."

"Well," the celestial wizard said slowly. "I really just think that you should apologize, Natsu."

"I have."

"For real. And really understand what it is that you did wrong."

"I… I shouldn't wreck your stuff. And I shouldn't be so careless. I get that. And I wanna stay your boyfriend for pretty much ever." Then, grinning for real that time, he said, "I love you, Luce. We're a team. Me, you and Happy. Forever."

Laxus would have been glad for them…had he still not had a bill to cover. But the demon seemed pretty happy with herself and that was worth something. Not as many jewels as the whole thing cost him, but definitely something.

When they got home that night, Laxus just wanted to take a hot shower and relax some.

Mira wasn't hearing it.

"-great I am at stuff like this, you know?"

"Uh-huh."

"I've always been good at pairing people up, but to be able to keep them together is just so stellar, right?"

"Uh-huh."

"And clearly, I'm meant to do this now, for, like, real."

"Uh-huh."

"And help other people too."

"Uh-huh."

"With you."

"Uh-huh."

"We're a great team."

"Uh-huh."

"So we can do it then, Laxus? You're going to help me counsel other people?"

"Do what now?" He glanced up for the first time from the book he was reading and over at his girlfriend. She was sitting on the other side of the bed, facing him with her legs crossed as she strummed at her guitar. "Demon?"

"I just think that you and I could help a lot of people," she said. "I mean, we're pretty good together, huh?"

"Try pretty great," he grumbled. "But…uh… What are you blabbering about? Mira? Something about me and you helping or-"

"Think about it, dragon." She moved to prop her guitar up against the bedside table before shifting to lay on her side next to him. "We can help all of our friends be happy."

"What friends? My friends are happy. With worshipping me. What else do they need?"

"Lisanna and Bickslow, fine, they're pretty happy, but poor Ever and Elfman, they're always fighting. We can help with that. And Levy and Gajeel are-"

"I don't care about any of this. At all."

"Do you care about me?'

"Well, yeah, Mira, you're my demon. I-"

"Then you care about this."

"But Mirajane," he groaned as she took his book from his hand before tossing it onto his nightstand. "I don't wanna help people have good relationships. I don't want them in relationships. It's disgusting and I pretty much dislike them in every way. Other than the way that I want to lead and mold them. I like that way."

"Laxus." She pressed a hand into his chest then, staring into his eyes. "Please, dragon? Remember when I said earlier, back at the bar, that I have a higher purpose?"

"Uh…"

"Remember?"

"Sure." Not at all. "I remember."

"Well, what if it's not to be an amazing singer? What if it's to help our friends in their relationships? Like I did Natsu and Lucy?"

"Mirajane," he sighed. "You didn't help them. They're both idiots. They would have been all fixed by tonight with or without your help."

"That's not true."

"It is, demon." Still though, he sighed at the look on her face and moved to press a kiss to her forehead. "Look, if, like, Ever or someone comes to you for advice or whatever, you can help 'em. But I ain't taking everyone out to dinner because you wanna play therapist."

'Therapist. Therapy. Couples Therapy!"

Ugh.

"I can talk to Ever and you can talk to Elfman and then we can talk to them together-"

"I was using her as an example. No. I don't wanna help your dorky brother and Ever be together. At all."

"Too late." She kissed him that time before moving back to her side of the bed. "Now goodnight."

"Goodnight? Demon," he grumbled. "You said-"

"I said that I would come home with you. And I have. Now I'm tired. So goodnight."

"You're bad," he critiqued, though he did reach over to turn off the lamp on his nightstand. Then, shifting so he was on his side, he buried face in her hair, sighing slightly as she just giggled. "Demon."

He was still banking on the fact that no one would want Mira's help then. Who would? The only reference point she had was Lucy and Natsu, and who would actually believe that she kept them together? Or that those bozos would actually break up?

So, basically, he was safe. The demon could spend the rest of the night dreaming of helping others and he could go on with his life as if the conversation had never happened.

…Right?

"Can I have my headphones back now?"

"Never."

Sigh.

 


	2. Chapter 2

  


The next two days went by easily for Laxus. Mainly because he went out on a job, hoping that if he was gone for a day or two, the demon would forget all about her new dream and go back to droning on about her usual stuff; babies, singing, marriage, how he never did nice things for her anymore. The safe stuff.

That couples stuff was anything but.

And on the day he returned, the demon was so swamped at the bar that she hardly even greeted him. So, as he'd left his bodyguards behind for the job, he went to sit with them. Freed was ecstatic to see him and Bickslow was focused in on Lisanna, who was sitting with them.

Ever though, just sighed.

A lot.

It was very noticeable.

Laxus turned his headphones up, glad Mira wasn't around to confiscate them.

But she kept sighing, just about every time Lisanna giggled. Which was a lot. She always thought Bickslow was just so funny. Needless to say, Laxus never rightly got that.

"What's wrong, Evergreen?"

Oh, and though she was very well indoctrinated in the world of Bickslow, the deep rules and roots of the Thunder Legion were still clearly lost on Lisanna. Had to be. Else she'd have known not to ask that.

Even Bickslow gave Lisanna the eye for that. Freed actually sighed himself, preparing for whatever was going to come next. And Laxus thought about strangling her for her transgression.

Ever started talking before he finished weighing all the pros and cons.

"Well," she said as she sat her hand fan down on the table before glancing around at all four of them. "I'm sure that you know, since it's your stupid brother that is acting like such a jerk towards me constantly."

"No," Lisanna said slowly. "I didn't even know that the two of you were fighting. What-"

"Lissy," Bickslow grumbled as he leaned down brush his lips against her ear. "Knock it off. We don't ask her things. Or even seem interested in her life. Else she'll talk about it."

"I can hear you," Evergreen complained.

"I wanted you to. I was just talking about Lissy's ear because she likes it."

Lisanna shivered slightly when he kissed her ear. "I do."

Bleh. Laxus was glad he hadn't eaten yet or else it would have all come back up. Ever was bad enough, but watching Bickslow and Lisanna… If he kept thinking about it, vile would come up with or without a meal.

"The point is," Ever went on, "that Elfman's acting like an ass."

"That's not nice," Lisanna said, glancing away from her boyfriend to stare at the woman. "What'd he even do?"

"I do not know about you," Freed mumbled softly to Laxus. "But I'm starting to dislike that one."

"Been saying that forever."

"I can hear too," Lisanna complained as Bickslow just stuck his tongue out at them.

"Elfman is all mad or whatever because he thinks that I keep standing him up for dates."

"Are you?" Lisanna asked.

"What difference does that make?"

"Ooh, are you guys talking about Elf?"

Mirajane was over there then, bringing Laxus his standard beer as she was finally somewhat less busy. Great. Damn her and her ability to rightly guess what he needed it and when he needed it.

"No," Laxus tried, but it was drowned out by Ever who just sighed.

"It's nothing," she said with a shake of her head. "Just that your brother is a horrible person and-"

"Why do you make dates with him if you're only going to break them?" Lisanna wasn't giving up. She received a flick to the head from Bickslow in retaliation. Even he was growing tired of her.

"Because, Lisanna, sometimes I have lapses of judgment."

"This is actually quite the improvement when you really think about it," Freed said then. "I mean, to say that she breaks dates with him at least acknowledges the fact that they do date. Or at least make them. How long did it take her to get that far?"

That made Mira smile. Then she made Laxus shift some so she could sit in his lap.

"Demon-"

"Hey, Ever, did you hear about how I fixed Lucy and Natsu?"

"Why would I even care to hear about that?"

"Fixed them?" Lisanna frowned. "What was wrong with them?"

"What's right with them? Am I right? Huh? Huh? Nothing?" Bickslow pulled his tongue back into his mouth. "I hate you guys."

"Remember? How I told you that they came to me seeking guidance and I gave it to them?" Mira was all smiles. "Laxus was there too."

"I was," he grumbled. "So I know first hand that is not what happened."

"It's exactly what happened."

"Is not."

"Dragon, are you arguing with me?"

Growling, he took to looking off. Stupid woman.

"Now," Mirajane said, sitting up real tall in her boyfriend's lap. "Ever, I might just have the perfect cure for you and Elfman."

"Don't you have to get back to work?" her boyfriend complained.

"I'm on break."

"You're in the middle of a rush!"

"Shush, Laxus."

Freed narrowed his eyes at Mirajane then. "I think you forget who you are-"

"Shut up, Freed," Laxus sighed. "The sooner she gets it out of her system, the better."

"Look, Mira, whatever you're up to, I'm sure that you mean well, but I'm really just not interested," Ever said. "At all. I mean, you're like a total conflict of interest here, right?"

"Yes, sure, whatever," Bickslow groaned. "Just get her to shut up, someone. All of them."

"Bicks." Lisanna made a face at him. "You're being a jerk."

"Sorry, Lissy."

"Don't apologize," Laxus grumbled. "If you're rude, maybe they'll all scram."

"Dragon."

Sigh.

"Sorry, Mirajane."

Freed frowned. "You Strausses have ruined everything, I hope you know."

"You guys just aren't going to make it easy to talk here, are you?" Mirajane complained. Then she sighed. "Well, I guess with Elf not here, it would be useless anyhow. This is  _couples_  therapy, after all."

"This is what now?" Bickslow frowned at Lisanna. "You're therapy-ing me without my consent now? What is this world coming to?"

"I'm not doing anything!"

"So," Mirajane said, clapping her hands. "You and Elf are going to have to go out to eat with me and Laxus and-"

"Eat with Laxus?" Ever picked up her fan once more. "Well, I suppose I could-"

"No." Laxus wasn't playing that time. "We definitely aren't doing that, Mirajane."

"Lax-"

"No. I'm not paying for more people to eat out."

"It's different this time. You like Elfman and Ever."

"Moderately."

"Dragon-"

"I said no."

"Fine." She huffed slightly. "We'll just have to have dinner over at your apartment. I'll cook, of course."

"G-Go eat dinner at Laxus' place? Yes, yes, yes!"

"No, no, no," Laxus growled over the sound of Evergreen's shrieking. "Mira-"

"Too late. I'm making your favorite, anyhow."

"You're really getting on my nerves."

She just slipped out of his lap. "How's tomorrow, Ever?"

"Perfect. So perfect."

"I wanna go. Me and Lissy should have an invite," Bickslow complained.

"And me," Freed said. "I can find a date. I-"

"No." Mira turned to walk off again. "Just the four of us. If anyone else shows up, they're going to be turned away. I'll tell Elfman, okay, Ever?"

"What? Oh, yeah, sure. If he has to come."

"I think that's the whole point," Lisanna said.

"No," Laxus groaned, having to resist the urge to bang his head against the table. "The whole point is for Mirajane to ruin my life. And, as always, she's doing it very well."

* * *

"I've never eaten over at Laxus' place before," Elfman said as he walked along next to his (sometimes) girlfriend. "I've never even been there."

"I have. A few times." Ever was in an upbeat mood just from the thought. With a frown over at Elfman, she said, "Don't you try and embarrass me. Got it?"

"Why would I try and embarrass you? What sense does that make?"

"Fine, Elfman. It doesn't matter if you're trying or not. Just don't do it. Got it?"

He just sighed. "Whatever. Let's just get this over with."

It was Laxus that answered the door when they arrived at the apartment, though he just glared out at them, hardly opening the door. In a soft, harsh tone, he spoke.

"Let's get one thing straight; the demon is my life. She wants this, so we're doing this. You idiots are going to come in fighting and then, before dinner's over, make up and tell her it was her doing. Because that's what she wants. Either that or I break your kneecaps. Got it?"

"Whatever you want, Laxus!"

"I would never lie to my big sister!"

Growl. "Look, Elf _boy_  you either-"

"Laxus, is that them?" they heard Mirajane call from somewhere in the apartment. "Let them in, silly. Dinner's just about ready."

More growling. Then he took a step back. Better than arguing with her, anyhow.

Inside, Elfman was shocked to find that Laxus' apartment wasn't a dump. He figured that he didn't care much for the place, considering that he was gone so much. It was nicely furnished and decorated and…and…and he was dating Mirajane. Made sense when Elfman remembered that.

It was kinda awkward too, as they stood around in the living room. Evergreen was gushing out her love and admiration of Laxus while he stood off to the side, sipping a beer, seemingly indifferent. And Elfman just sat on the couch, waiting for Mirajane to call them to the table. She'd said that they should sit and talk, then gave Laxus a weird wink, but so far, that hadn't happened. Not that Elfman was complaining…

"Are you all getting along in there?" Mirajane called at one point. "I don't hear any counseling!"

"Counseling?" Elfman repeated. "Why would you hear any counseling?"

"Why exactly did the demon tell you that you were here?" Laxus asked with a slight frown.

"To eat! Like a man!"

Ever sighed. "There will be a lot of that, yes, I suppose."

"But this counseling business-" Elfman tried, but Ever had gotten back to fawning over Laxus and the other man never cared to talk to him anyhow.

When it was finally time to get down to eating, Elfman was more than happy. Mirajane spent little time cooking at home for him and Lisanna anymore, as she was either working or with Laxus. Not to mention, he and Ever hadn't been on a proper date in weeks and, well, having a double one with his manly big sis was just swell for the big guy.

As for Laxus, he was just dismayed that the demon had, once again, taken away his headphones and refused to give them back until they gave Evergreen and Elfman a proper therapy session. And, well, if she wanted therapy, he was gonna give her some therapy.

"So Ever," Laxus started not soon after they'd sat down to start eating. "Is the reason that you're so adverse to Elfman and you dating openly because you don't think he's up to your standards or because you have horrible daddy issues? And can you pass the salt?"

Everyone just looked at him.

Narrowing his eyes at Mirajane, he said, "What? Is it some sorta faux pas to ask for some damn salt now? Huh? I hurt your feelings?"

"Laxus," Ever whispered. "Why would you-"

"Well, that's how you do therapy, ain't it? Hit it straight on the head?" At least in his world where he really wanted his headphones back, you did that. "Get it done. Quick and easy. So which is it? Personally, I'd go with the first one because it's true, but hey, who doesn't have daddy issues these days?"

Elfman looked to Mirajane. "What's he going on about?"

But she was just shooting daggers at her boyfriend.

"Laxus," Mira hissed. "Come speak with me in the other room. Now."

"Unless it's to give me a blow or get my headphones back, no. You wanted therapy and, well, I'm givin' it the best way I know how. Deal with it."

"Laxus-"

"There you guys go again. Counseling. Therapy. What? You think there's something wrong with someone in this room?" Elfman flexed. "'cause I know it ain't me! Men don't need therapy!"

Ever was still just staring at her idol though. "Do you think…I have…d-daddy issues? Or-"

"I think, in my very unprofessional opinion," he began as Mira looked ready to strangle him, "that you have commitment issues. I was much the same. Then I found Mirajane and that all went away. Clearly, Elfman ain't the one for you. And if we can move on from this sham of a counseling session now that I've resolved everything, I want the salt. And if not that, at least some damn dessert."

"Wait a minute." Elfman glanced around. "You guys are trying to counsel me, aren't you? Well, it ain't gonna work! I don't have nothin' wrong with me. Never have, never will. And neither does Ever."

"Once again, in my unprofessional opinion," Laxus started, still ignoring the demon's daggers. "You've got a very strange fixation on the idea of men. Not to mention, you have low self-esteem. I mean, hell, even Bickslow could probably score with Ever and be done with her. But you? You just keep lettin' yourself get dragged along. And for what? So we could all sit here and pretend to have some bullshit conversation so that the demon feels better about herself? I mean- Ow, Mira!"

"What? I didn't-"

"I kicked you," Ever said before kicking him under the table again. Laxus turned his angry gaze onto her.

"And why the hell would you do that?"

Honestly? Impulse. Which she was regretting then as Laxus was, after all, the greatest man to ever live in her eyes. But still. He was starting to tick her off.

"I-I-"

"Because you're ruining everything!" Mira though wasn't apologetic in the slightest. "We were supposed to ease into things. Not just lead off with a bombshell."

"What bombshell? Everyone in damn Fairy Tail has daddy issues. I thought that was obvious. And I'm not even a real psychologist."

"Psychiatrist," Ever whispered.

"No, I think he had it right," Elfman said. "The first one sounds a lot more manly."

"Whatever," Laxus growled. "The point is, Evergreen, that you got a choice here; either your with Elfboy or you're not. Personally? I would choose not. But I can't live your life for you. And if you want him, fine! No one cares. You guys have built up this big cataclysmic event, but it's not. Everyone knows that you've been fucking, hell, longer than anyone in the damn guild. So just come out with it. I'm not disappointed in you or whatever. I got snagged by a Strauss too."

"And she's about to clobber you if you don't shut up," Mirajane warned stiffly.

"Just…tell the poor guy if you're for real about him or not," Laxus said finally. "And give me the salt while you're at it."

Ever still only stared. "I don't…"

"This is all so confusing," Elfman complained. "Men don't talk about these things!"

"Thanks a lot, Laxus." Mira sat back then, crossing her arms. "Now I'm down one."

"Down one? I've fixed them. If Ever would just open her damn mouth, we could move on. And do we just not own salt or something?"

"I thought we were here to talk about you, Elfman," Ever spoke up then, looking across the table at him. Laxus glanced at her too, but that was because he searching the crowded table for the salt shaker and was looking in her general direction. "Not me."

"I thought we were here to eat."

"No one's stoppin' ya," Laxus grumbled. "Demon, your turn. I gotta go find some salt. I gave them all the expertise I have."

"This was your expertise?" Mira complained. "Telling Ever she has personal issues and saying she should break up with my brother?"

"I am a complex individual-"

"Go get your headphones out of the bedroom. And put them on for the rest of dinner. You're not allowed to listen or talk to anyone from this point forth."

"Finally," he said, pushing up from the table. "I thought you'd never say that."

"Wait, Laxus," Ever said then. "I… You're right. I shouldn't just lead Elfman along."

"Yeah, I know. Still leaving. Headphones, you know?"

"But, I still don't think it's fair that you guys are saying only things about me. Elfman does things to me too," she pointed out.

"Like what?" Mira asked.

"Well, gee, how about every time I invite him over, he breaks my things? Or moves my things? Or eats all my food? Or-"

"You can't fault me for being a man," Elfman complained.

"Now, Elfman," Mira started as Laxus made his escape. When she saw him take his plate with him, she knew he wouldn't be back. Maybe that was for the better… "She raises good points too. You are kinda of…abrasive at times."

"That's because men are abrasive!"

"Stop yelling," his sister went on. "And no, they're not."

"Laxus is."

"Right now, Laxus will be lucky if I don't kick him out of the apartment tonight."

"Isn't this his apartment?" Ever asked.

"I don't understand the question."

Elfman slammed his fist down on the table. "Men don't talk about this! I don't want to do this anymore. Can't we talk about something else?"

"I'm helping you, Elfman," Mira told him. "You and Ever."

"We don't need help."

"Yes, Elfman, you do. I mean, do you not wanna be as happy as me and Laxus?"

"You just kicked him out of the kitchen," Evergreen pointed out.

"But that's different. We're not a couple right now. We're both psychologists."

"Psychiatrists."

"Whatever!" Mira took a deep breath before saying, "Elfman, I know how much it hurts you sometimes, when she turns you down for dates. Or makes dates and then cancels."

"Or just doesn't show up," Elfman added. "That one kinda sucks too."

"I've done that, what? Once?" Ever defended.

"At least five times."

"Yeah, well, things come up."

"But that's the thing," Mirajane said. "Things shouldn't just come up. Not like that. Do you or do you not love Elfman?"

Scoffing, Evergreen looked off. "That is a very loaded question."

"Does that mean no?" Mira asked. "Because if it's no, then what are we doing here?"

"You made me come here," Elfman complained.

"And I just came to be around Laxus. Which, apparently, is over." Ever huffed. "You know, this was a really bad idea. Maybe-"

"No, it's not." Mirajane wasn't giving up. "This is my calling. And…and… You guys are ruining!"

"Mira," Elfman sighed as she teared up some. "We're not trying to. It's just… This is how Ever and I are. We can't change that. We don't need any help. We love each other. Even if she doesn't wanna say it."

"Freed's right. You Strausses are a hassle," Ever replied with a frown. "But… Elfman's right, Mirajane. There's nothing to fix. We're fine. And…I won't break dates so much anymore."

"And I'll try to not break your stuff." At the look on Ever's face, Elfman added, "Try harder, I mean."

"Then that means I've now officially fixed two couples." Just like that, her tears were gone and Mira was clapping, ignoring Ever's scowl at her words and Elfman's confusion.

"I'm all the way in the other damn room, demon," they heard Laxus growl from somewhere. "And even I know that's not what happened."

"Oh, hush, Laxus."

Still though, from in his bedroom, where he was suffering through dinner with no salt (seriously, were they just out?) it was hard to deny the weight that was lifted off his chest. Lucy and Natsu, Mira had gotten lucky. But clearly, Elfman and Evergreen had shown her that it wasn't just simple to fix things between two people. And some things just didn't need fixing.

He figured that would be the end of that. He'd even go out and buy her some new guitar picks. Maybe a new amp. Get her back into music and off therapy.

Simple as pie.

…Or at least he hoped.

 


	3. Chapter 3

  


Mirajane, of course, considered Elfman and Evergreen another success story to brag about.

Everyone else? Not so much.

In fact, all the other people that were paired off avoided Mirajane. Heavily. The only people that would really talk to her were Bisca and Alzack, but that was because there was nothing to fix.

Trust Mirajane, she'd tried. They were perfect together and for one another.

Sigh.

Laxus was more than happy with this, however. He figured that it meant that she'd get over the whole thing and move on.

Of course, he never was too lucky in most aspects.

"What's wrong, demon?" he asked one night as she sat there only his couch, looking rather forlorn. For her, anyhow. By which he meant she wasn't smiling or giggling or…or anything. She was just… _being._ That was definitely not something she usually was.

At first, Laxus was happy with her new attitude. She'd held it for the past day and a half and things had been great. She hadn't nagged him or showered him with love or kept him from just living his life at his usual, apathetic pace.

He would admit though that it was kinda…lonely without Mirajane being, well, Mirajane.

Sigh.

How had he fallen for her again?

"I'm just… Why won't anyone let me help them, Laxus?"

"Help them what? 'cause if you wanna help me, right now, I'm game."

Eyeing him wearily, she asked, "Help you what?"

"Get rid of this stiff-"

"And you ruined it."

With a sigh, he came to sit down next to her on the couch. "Mirajane, demon, it's not that no one wants your help. It's that…no one needs it. That's all."

Gah! Why couldn't he just tell her the truth? She sucked at everything outside of bartending, demonic stuff, and giving blows. For him, that was a pretty good list. Most women can't do half that. Or any of it, for that matter. Well, at least.

"Of course they do," she insisted. "They have to. What other purpose do I have?"

"You're the best barmaid around," he offered up. That just made her sigh more.

"I'm useless."

"You're an amazing wizard."

"One that doesn't like to hurt people and only ever fights when her friends need her to. What good is that? When everything's peaceful?"

"Around here that don't last long anyhow."

"Laxus-"

"You're really good at singing," he said. "And I was thinkin' of buying you a new amp or something. So…just focus on that, okay?"

But she couldn't. And it was obvious. She felt like no one believed in her or some stupid girl thing like that. So he had to fix it. Because he just had to.

Sigh. The things Laxus did for love…

"What are you doing over here?" Gajeel growled the next day when Laxus sat down at the table with him and his kitty. They'd been enjoying some alone time, but apparently that was over.

"Yes," Lily agreed, reaching up to grab his ears, just in case. "What do you want, Laxus?"

Glancing back and forth between the two of them, his eyes landed on Pantherlily. "To have some privacy. Now."

"Hey!" Gajeel, unlike Laxus, wasn't the seething anger type. His bubbled over easily and normally quickly. Slamming his fist down on the table, he made his mug of ale jump as he said, "Anything you can say in front of me, you can say in front of- Where are you going, cat?"

"Away," he said as he jumped off the table and scurried over to where Levy and Lucy were giggling with Lisanna over something, Happy floating around as well. "From him."

Hn. Problem solved.

Narrowing his eyes then at Laxus, Gajeel said, "Well? What do you want then?"

Laxus glanced around before, in a soft voice, saying, "I want you and your girl to go on a date with me and the demon. So she can fix you or whatever."

"What girl?" Gajeel frowned at him. "And what demon?"

"What's with you idiots being raised by dragons and never getting any sort comprehension skills?"

"You-"

"The demon. Mirajane. My…girlfriend." He hated that word, but Mira had driven it home to him that she very much so was that.

"And who's my girl then? I-"

Laxus nodded over at where Lily had run off to. "The flat-chested one."

"She's not fl…my girl." He coughed. "So scram."

"Oh, bull. You two are always all over one another, your cat can't get enough fo her-"

"Then maybe he's her girl, huh? But not mine. So-"

"Laxus!"

Suddenly, the woman in question was standing there, a very terrified looking Pantherlily standing at her feet. When Gajeel glanced at him though, the cat dropped his hands from over his ears, not wanting to seem weak. Laxus narrowing his eyes though got those hands right back up.

"I don't care what you two are doing," Levy said with a frown, "but threatening Lily with thunder is not nice. Just because Mirajane has the day off doesn't mean you get to torment the rest of us."

"I didn't threaten nothin'," he said.

"I felt threatened," Lily intervened. When Laxus looked at him once more though, he moved to stand behind Levy. "Err…never mind, I suppose. I'm not afraid or anything anyhow, Levy, just-"

"And what are you two talking about anyhow?" she asked suspiciously. "That's so important?"

"Nothi-" Gajeel started, but Laxus wasn't having it. If he couldn't go through Black Steel, he'd use Levy instead.

"Me and the demon were gonna go out tomorrow," he said slowly, still questioning himself, honestly. Did he really want Mirajane to feel better that badly? Was he that soft now?

For her, yes.

More sighs.

"And we were wondering if you and Gajeel wanted to go with us," he said with a shrug.

"Why?"

"I dunno. We, uh, haven't been getting along well recently," he said slowly. There. Good plan. "And you like Mira, huh?"

"Well, of course. Duh."

"And I…uh… Gajeel's okay," he said slowly.

"What do you mean?" The other man frowned at him. "I'm way more than just okay!"

"And you guys could be a, uh, buffer," Laxus went on. "We're just going through a really rough part of our relationship and I think that if we went on a date with some of our…acquaintances there, it'd work out better."

"Aw, Laxus." Gajeel knew he was beat then as Levy gave him the most feminine look she could. "You really care about Mirajane, don't you? That you're willing to go to these lengths to fix things?"

"Yeah," he said, being more truthful than the other woman knew. "I really do."

"Count me out," Pantherlily said as Levy reached down to pick him up. "I will find somewhere else to be."

Even better, Laxus figured. Levy just rubbed at his ears some, the way he liked.

"Laxus wouldn't make it thunder just to bother you," she said as she turned to walk back over to Lucy and Lisanna who were watching in interest. "You're just paranoid."

"Still. You and Gajeel have fun on your own."

"Considering we're being asked to help fix Mira and Laxus, I'm not sure if that's possible," she said as she sat down.

"What are you talking about?" Lucy prompted almost immediately, Lisanna also interested. It was her sister, after all. And Happy, the king of all things involving love (except when it came to his own life) dropped down on Lucy's head to listen in too.

While Levy was explaining the situation to them though, Gajeel was asking about the same question of Laxus.

"The hell is this?" he grumbled to the other man who was calling out to Kinana to bring him a beer. "Huh? What-"

"Look," he said with just as much of a growl right back. "Me and the demon are fine."

"Like I really care."

"But she's real down right now because she ain't no good at setting people up or fixing them or any of that stuff."

"What's that got to do with-"

"She's gonna fix you too."

"We ain't broken!"

"That's not the point."

"You're-"

"You and flat-chest are friends, right?" Laxus prompted. Gajeel's gaze darkened.

"If you don't stop callin' her that, I'll-"

"Great. So you are. Well, wouldn't you like to get somethin' out of that? Huh?"

"What do you mean?"

"I think you know what I mean."

Gajeel crossed his arms and looked off then. "Me and the shrimp ain't any of your business. And-"

"Honestly, I don't care what the two of you are," Laxus told him. "But the demon does. Which means I gotta pretend to. So can't you just, I dunno, try and act like we're all out on a group date? Then let the demon think that she's fixed some sorta rift between the two of you."

"There is no rift between us."

"Just do it, alright? I…well… I'll owe you one, alright?"

"Owe me one?" That peeked the man's interest as he glanced back over at the other slayer. "Owe me what?"

"I dunno," Laxus said with a shrug. "Whatever you want, I guess."

Hmmm…

"I want you to get me some time up on the stage, yeah? To play my music?" He unfolded his arms then. "Every time I try, they force me off! And it just ain't fair. I have a whole set planned out. Some new dreads to show off."

Laxus frowned. "So what? You want me to get you a little song up on the stage?"

"Mirajane can be the opening act, yeah? And then I come out and they have to listen because you've ordered it or your grandfather or something. I want two full hours of just me and my guitar."

"I dunno…"

"Everyone will hate you even more for it and probably won't bother you as much."

Hmmm…

"And don't you want your…demon to feel better? It's a fair trade, I think."

Laxus didn't. But still, if it was the only way, what choice did he have?

"Fine," he said with sigh. "But practice some, huh? And tune your guitar some time."

Growling, Gajeel said, "I don't take tips from armatures!"

"Whatever." Kinana was there then and, standing, Laxus took a beer off her tray before walking off. "You, your…shrimp, me, and the demon will be meeting up here tomorrow at six for dinner and then, well, hopefully things will all be settled then. So just be here."

Then Laxus downed his beer and prayed things all turned out okay.

After all, Gajeel and Levy were one of the last couples in Fairy Tail, right? So he was pretty much finished after them.

Right?

Wasn't he?

* * *

"Don't you find this kinda odd?" Levy asked Gajeel as they met up in front of the guildhall that day. Lily was with him, but already had plans of his own to hangout with Carla, Wendy, and Happy (he insisted on coming when he heard the other male was going to be around  _his_  cat), but was waiting with Gajeel for Mirajane and Laxus. "I mean-"

"Look, shrimp," Gajeel said, standing with his arms crossed as he looked around. "Laxus needs our help, so we're givin' it."

Of course, Levy hadn't been keyed in on all the facts like he had. She still thought that Mirajane and Laxus' relationship was in a state of peril and only she and Gajeel would be able to save it. Which sounded even weirder in her head, but hey. Both had done a lot in the guild and for her in the past, so what was the harm? She and Gajeel both weren't busy with jobs for once and usually hung out together anyhow.

"Where's your, you know, cheering squad?"

"Huh?" Levy frowned at him before saying, "Do you mean Jet and Droy?" When he shrugged, she said, "They're around, I guess, but I told them I was going out with Mira and Laxus and that they should just wait here for me."

Lily nodded his head. "Laxus seemed rather intent on the two of you accompanying him and Mirajane."

Gajeel frowned. "Why you gotta meddle, cat?"

He wasn't gong to let anyone mess up his two hour concert. No way, no how.

"I'm not," the Exceed said. "I only-"

"I think it's sweet," Levy said, glancing at both of them. "Laxus really must love Mirajane to try and work on things like this. So we should be supportive, Gajeel."

Speaking of support… With a yawn, he moved to rest his elbow on her head and lean again her.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," he grumbled as she just smiled. "They need to hurry up though. I ain't got all night!"

"What else could you have possibly been doing?" Levy asked.

"Important things. Like trainin' or practicing my guitar. What else?"

Lily sighed as the man and woman in question came strolling through the gates. "Here they are. And here I go. Have fun you two."

"Is that even possible?" Gajeel mumbled to Levy.

"Be nice," she said with a frown. "Laxus is counting on us, you know."

"Yeah, sure."

"Gajeel-"

"I'll try to help out or whatever, alright? And hey, shrimp, if…if they think that, you know, this is a date or something-"

"It is, right?" She glanced up at him, knocking his elbow off her head. "For them?"

"Well, yeah, but they might think it's, you know, a double date or-"

"Oh. Well…"

"And it's not."

"Of course not."

"We're just friends hanging out with friends."

"Who said we weren't?"

But Mirajane and Laxus were upon them then, the former talking loudly about how excited she was over the whole thing.

It showed.

And for once, it wasn't Laxus sighing, but Gajeel. Loudly.

"Hi, Levy," Mirajane greeted with a giggle. "Gajeel."

Laxus just frowned at them though. "Come on. Let's get this over with."

"Laxus," his girlfriend chided. "Don't be that way."

But he was that way. The entire day he'd been mulling over his decision and, honestly, the jury was still out on whether or not it was a good one. He would admit though that Mirajane had been in better spirits. And he already knew it'd turn out better than the whole Elfman and Evergreen fiasco.

Oh, and for the record, he'd gone out and bought a new salt shaker so they'd never have to go through that again.

"So," Mira said as they left the grounds, her walking with one of her arms entangled with Laxus'. Glancing back at the other two, she smiled at them. "It's really nice out tonight, huh?"

Ugh. The demon was going to kill him. Great.

Gajeel just grunted. Levy though, thinking that her deflecting onto them instead of focusing on her man was a cry for help, took to nodding.

"Super nice," she said with a nod. "Aren't you glad that Laxus planned this all? He must, like, really love you."

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Way to be subtle, shrimp," Gajeel mumbled when Mira turned back around.

"I'm trying, okay?"

"Not very well."

"What are you guys whispering about?" Laxus was the one that spoke then, though that was more because Mirajane was prompting him to. She kept staring up at him and mouthing, "Please?" at him.

"Nothing," Levy said as Gajeel just rolled his eyes and took to crossing his arms.

"Are we gonna eat soon?" the man complained. "Or what?"

"Well," Mira said slowly. "I thought that we could all just hangout some first, but if you want-"

"Yes. Now. Quickly."

"Gajeel," Levy hissed, making him glance down at her. "This is about them, remember? Not you."

Oh, no, it was about him. Him getting his music time that is.

"Yeah, sure, shrimp, whatever."

"I mean it."

Snort. "When don't I come through? Huh?"

Well…

Things only got more awkward from there. Laxus never once thought of the mess he'd created, as Levy tried many times to open dialogues that might bridge the gap between him and his girlfriend while Mirajane seemed far more focused on Gajeel and her. It'd never occurred to him that the two might not mesh well.

And by might, he meant didn't at all.

"So Levy," Mirajane would start. "You and Gajeel have been getting along well?"

"Well, yeah," she would respond. "But I'm much more interested in you and Laxus. You guys relationship is just so…so…interesting."

"I doubt that."

"No, Mirajane, honestly. You guys have been together what now?"

"A very, very long time," was Laxus response to that. Always. It usually would get him a glare from Mirajane and a command to behave.

That night was no different.

Laxus and Gajeel mostly just kept giving one another glances, as if testing the other one to see who would break first. They were both miserable, but they both had pay offs and had to stick with it. Laxus wanted Mirajane to feel better and Gajeel, well, concert. How many times does that need to be stated?

"Well," Mira tried once. "You know, I've noticed that the two of you don't spend a lot of time together recently."

"What? No. We spend tons of time together." Levy glanced at Gajeel. "I mean, as much as we should."

He shrugged. "I see you every day I ain't out on a job. What more do you want?"

"I don't want anymore! I wasn't the one who said something. In fact," Levy went on, glancing between Mirajane and Laxus. "Did you ever think that maybe the two of you spend too much time together? And that's, you know, a problem too?"

"What do you mean?" Mirajane frowned. "Laxus and I don't spend too much time together. Not at all. And there's nothing wrong with us."

"Okay," Levy was quick to back off. "I just know how much Laxus wants this to work out."

"What to work out?"

"You know. You guys' relationship."

Mira blinked. Then she glanced at her boyfriend? "Why wouldn't it, Laxus?"

"I…I…" He started coughing then, loudly, before pushing up from the table. "I got something caught in my throat."

"Laxus!"

Mirajane was quick to jump up and follow him. As the two went to talk between themselves, Gajeel snickered.

"Gee-hee."

"What?" Levy glanced up at him. "Why's it funny, Gajeel? I think it's kinda sad, really, that Mirajane and Laxus-"

"Calm down, woman," he complained, reaching out to pick up his glass of water, wishing the food would hurry up and show up. "That's not why we're really here."

"What do you mean?"

"Laxus was just tryin' to get you on board, yeah?" Rolling his shoulders, he said, "Mirajane is on some sorta kick where she likes to try to fix people's problems."

"W-What problem do we have?"

"Hell if I know," he grumbled. "But she thinks there's one, so you let her fix it, yeah?"

"Why do you care?"

"'cause," he grumbled. "The sooner it gets fixed, the sooner this is over. And, just so you know, I've been promised two hours play time out of this if we just suffer through. So stop questioning her, huh?"

"Play time?"

"Up on the stage. You should be there." He grinned that time. "It will be quite the show. I've been practicing."

"Why do you get something?" Levy asked with a frown. "What about me?"

"I think he was content in tricking you into thinking you were helping them out. Which you are in a way, I guess." He shrugged slightly. "You could be my roadie if you want."

"Your what?"

"You know, carry my guitar and amp around for me, help me set up-"

"Uh, no thanks, Gajeel. I think I'll pass."

"Fine," he grumbled. "Your loss."

"I'm sure."

When Mirajane and Laxus returned, Levy was a little more than peeved at him, but still, if Mirajane wanted to 'fix' her and Gajeel, she figured she'd let her have at it. There was nothing wrong with them, after all. She'd be hard-pressed to find anything.

"So your cough is all better, Laxus?" Levy asked with a slight grin as the man sat down across from her. He narrowed his eyes, if only for a moment before nodding slightly.

"Yeah," was the grumbled reply she got.

Mirajane had her excited face on once more and was no doubt ready to get back to what she'd came for; to counsel her and Gajeel. Sigh.

"This sure is fun," Mirajane tried once more. Levy, more willing that time, nodded her head.

"Yeah, it is," she said. "We've never all gone out together, the four of us before. Isn't that kinda funny? We've known each other all this time."

"Why's that funny?" Gajeel grumbled. "None of us are-"

"Concert," was what it sounded like Laxus coughed then, but then again, maybe Mira was hearing things.

Whatever it was, it got Gajeel to stop speaking. And then, bowing his head, he said, "Yeah. All this time. Amazing. Hey, Mira, you know what?"

"What?"

"I, uh…I heard from the Salamander and Lucy that…that you…"

"Yes?" Mira was sitting up real tall then, her smile seeming to grow. Laxus just rolled his eyes. Finally, they were playing along.

"That you helped them…uh…have a better relationship. And that's what I'm lookin' for me and the shrimp here."

Levy frowned at him before glancing at Mirajane. "Friendship."

"No, I understand," she said with a nod of her head. "Friends have relationships too."

Laxus just frowned. Huh. So they really weren't dating. Well crap. he'd chosen the wrong people. Oh well. Seemed to be workin' on the demon anyhow.

"Of course they do," Gajeel complained. "And we have issues."

"We do?" He glared at Levy for that until she said, "We do. Of course we do."

"Like?" Mira asked.

"Uh…"

"Levy don't appreciate my music properly."

That came out of nowhere. She frowned up at him as Mirajane just looked between them.

Laxus only sighed.

"Well," he said slowly. "That's an easy fix. Stop playing horrible music and she'll be able to like it. There. Next problem."

Gajeel growled in response. "I'm getting' real tired of you, sparky."

"What did you just call me?"

"I-"

"Laxus, behave," Mira told him, not even sparing the man a glance.

"Me? You're telling me to behave? What kinda sense does that-"

"I let you bring your headphones, didn't I?"

"You don't  _let_  me do anything, woman."

"Just listen to your music and ignore us if you're not going to be helpful."

"How am I not being helpful? I set this whole thing up, did I not?" Then, locking eyes with Gajeel, the other slayer said, "I mean, I could have gone to a  _concert_ instead, but I chose to be here."

"What is up with you and music today?" Mirajane complained as Gajeel just scratched at his head before looking off.

"Never mind," he told the woman. "The point is to fix me and Levy, right? So get to it."

"Gajeel," Levy complained. "And besides, Laxus is kinda right. I mean, your music just isn't…for me. That's all."

"Not for you? What do you mean? I even wrote you that song, didn't I?"

"Aw," Mirajane crooned. "Laxus, write me a song."

"I think you're forgetting the point of all this, demon."

"It's hardly a song," Levy complained. "It doesn't even have words."

"It's instrumental," he told her.

"How is a guitar solo supposed to be about me?"

"You interpret your own meaning into it!"

"What? All I mean to you is a bunch of poorly crafted together notes?"

"Oh, wow, demon." Laxus, who was moving to latch his headphones to his ears, stopped then. "This is fun. We should do this more often. Who else can we lure here with the ruse of helping them only to really be watching them fight?"

"Shut up, Laxus," was her response. And to Levy, she said, "Don't you think you're being a little harsh?"

"A little?" Gajeel complained.

"I mean sure," she went on. "His music sucks and nobody likes it-"

"Hey! What is this, huh? Beat up on Gajeel day?"

"But," Mirajane told her, "at least he cares enough to do something like that."

Still, Levy said, "Lily's song got words."

"Oh, what now? You're puttin' yourself on the same level as my cat?" he complained.

"No. I'm just stating a fact. That's all."

"So what? Huh? You want a whole new song?"

"I don't want a song to begin with. I was just saying."

"I really don't see that as being the main problem though," Mirajane said. "Clearly, Levy, your deflecting about something. Right? So what is it?"

"I'm not deflecting about anything," the other woman insisted. "Honest."

"I completely understand," Gajeel said. "If she doesn't feel like her song is up to her such high standards, fine. I'll just write you a new, better one. Constructive criticism is important in times such as these."

"Huh?" Laxus made a face. "How come hers is constructive and mine ain't?"

"Because you insulted him," Mirajane said. "And this isn't about you."

"Everything's about me."

"At least you try to make it that way," his girlfriend sighed. "And anyhow, Gajeel, I really think that we should dive deeper into this-"

"And the food's here." Laxus grinned at the server. He'd be getting a massive tip for that one. Perfect timing.

But that didn't stop the demon. Not soon after the waiter left, she started right up again.

"Maybe," she said slowly as Gajeel and Laxus both dug right in, hardly listening to her anymore. She had Levy's attention at least. "The song is a metaphor for something else."

"As the person that brought it up," Gajeel grumbled between bites. "I have to go with no."

"It's a metaphor that you didn't even realize you were making," Mira said. "Not consciously at least."

"I really don't think that Gajeel has enough brain power, even in his subconscious, to say anything other than what he really means," Laxus said. "I mean, honestly, Mira. And before you complain, Gajeel, just remember. Could have been at a  _concert_."

"I'm not stupid," Mira said, glancing between the two men. "What? Is concert code for something?"

"Nope," Laxus said with a shake of his head. "In fact, it's rather…up front. Wouldn't you say, Gajeel?"

"I ain't sayin' nothin'," he grumbled. "Till you explain to me what I was metaphorically sayin'."

"Metaphorically. Wow. Maybe you're not just full of nuts and bolts," the other man remarked with a hint of snark.

"Oh, I got a bunch of nuts alright, sparky. More than you'll ever have."

"What did you just-"

"Okay, okay," Levy complained, glancing between the two of them. "If anyone needs therapy, it's the two of you. I mean, sheesh. As two of the strongest wizards in the guild, you should at least try to get along."

"I do get along," Laxus grumbled." I get along just fine. It's you idiots that are bothersome."

"Why did you set this up, Laxus?" Mirajane asked with a frown. "If you don't even really want to help them?"

He didn't even glance at her. "I guess sometimes I have lapses of judgment. Sue me."

"I think you're lying," she said. "I think that you did this because you want to do this too. Because you actually think this is fun."

Oh, he was lying. But that definitely wasn't why.

"Think what you want," he grumbled. "But dinner's half over. Don't you think you should do more counseling and less bothering me while I'm trying to eat?"

"So what is it?" Gajeel wasn't giving up. "Huh? What does the song mean, oh so intelligent one?"

Mira thought for a second before saying, "I…don't know."

"Ha. Then it means nothing. And Levy just wants a song because she's jealous of a damn cat which is just-"

"I'm not jealous of anything," Levy complained. "And especially not Lily."

"As someone that's heard the song about your cat," Mira said slowly, "I would have to agree. Not many would be jealous of that."

Gah! Even Mirajane was against him? What kinda dinner was he on anyhow?

"If the song has a double meaning," Laxus grumbled, more to get the thing finished with, "it's probably that the two of you just need to hookup so that we can get the whole thing over with."

"Laxus, don't be vulgar."

"That's vulgar? I'll show you vulgar, Mirajane, if you want vulgar."

"I just said that I didn't."

Levy was blushing so deeply then that her whole body almost turned red. "I-I-"

"Yeah, that's definitely not what the song means. Concert or no concert," Gajeel grumbled.

"Ah, well, I tried." Laxus shrugged. "The song means nothing, Mirajane. Gajeel needs to write Levy a song and that's that. There. You helped them. Don't you two feel helped?"

No. Not at all. But as Levy only sat there, still stricken, Gajeel took to nodding.

"Lots."

"I really think we should dive into this more," the she-devil said slowly. "Maybe-"

"Sometimes, Mirajane," Laxus said as he reached over to pat her on the head. "A song is just a song. And a friendship is just a friendship. And an amazing boyfriend is just an amazing boyfriend. So if you're thinking of rewarding me for that last one, I take payment in the form of days without nagging and chocolate chip cookies."

Mira had no choice, but to give in then as the conversations drifted away from her precious therapy and more onto what kinda tips Mira had for Gajeel in becoming better at guitar (Levy's idea). Reluctantly she gave in.

To Laxus though on the walk back home, she was somewhat discouraged.

"I feel like I didn't get anything accomplished," she told him.

"I'm sorry, demon," he said, though he had to concur. "Don't feel so down about it, huh? Maybe there was just nothing wrong with them to begin with. I mean, you guys all say that they really are just friends, huh? So do they really need couples therapy anyhow?"

"A couple of friends," she reasoned. "And everyone has some sorta issue to work through, you'd think."

"Maybe at the moment they just don't have one. Which would mean you did a good job, huh? Keeping one from popping up?"

"Stop trying to make me feel better, Lax," she told him with a soft sigh. "I'm no good at this, am I?"

"Well…I think you're okay." He even bumped shoulders with her. "And I don't ever see you look on the dark side of things."

"I don't think there is a bright side this time."

"Of course there is," he insisted. "And if anyone can find it, I'm certain it's you."

Across town though, in the direction Gajeel and Levy were walking, they were having a conversation of nearly the same topic.

"I can't believe that Laxus would say something like that," Levy said as she and Gajeel walked around the park. Neither felt much for going back to the guild yet and it gave them some time to go over what had happened, anyway.

Or it did for Levy. Gajeel mostly just kept a scowl on his face and said very little.

"I dunno," he finally got out, hardly glancing at her. "I mean, it's Laxus. Who ever knows what he's going to say?"

"Yeah, but usually around Mirajane, he's more relaxed."

"I think he was just happy that she was feeling better."

Levy giggled slightly then, if only a little. "She did help Natsu and Lucy, I guess."

"And Evergreen and Elfman are beyond repair anyhow."

"Yeah, they don't really make much sense, do they?" she asked, glancing up at him.

"Who does?" When he looked back down at her, it was with a similar stare. "Shrimp?"

Smiling, she turned her stare back down to the ground. "The park's really pretty out tonight. There's hardly anyone around."

Grunt. "That just means they're all back at the guildhall, waiting to ruin our night."

"Hasn't it been ruined already?"

"For who? Me? No," he said with a shake of his head. "Not at all. I mean, we got to go out to dinner, talk about my music, I'm going to get to play up at the hall out of it. What was so wrong with it?"

They'd stopped walking then, almost simultaneously. And they were facing one another, his grin growing to where he was just showing a bit of his teeth. She wasn't blushing like she had been down at the restaurant, he'd give her that, but there was definitely some sort of a tint to her cheeks then. And when he leaned down to brush his lips against hers, it was almost too perfect.

Almost.

"Here you both are," they heard then, turning quickly, the red taking over Levy's entire body then. It was Lily, of course, flying towards then.

"I feared the worst," he said as he came to land next to them, though there was suspicion in his stare. Had he seen…what he thought he had? "When the two of you did not return to the bar."

"Hey, cat," Gajeel complained. "What's the big idea, huh? You keepin' tabs on me? The two of us can do things without one another, ya know!"

"Gajeel," Levy whispered, her grin returning once more. "And dinner was fine, Lily."

"Really?" He stared up at both fo them. "It seemed a tad more than just fine to me."

"I dunno what you're implyin'," Gajeel grumbled as he turned away. "But ya better quit implyin' it. Before I call Laxus back here to bring on some thunderstorms, huh?"

"Gajeel" Levy glared at him once more, losing all the blush in her cheeks. "You can't just threaten him with stuff like that, you know. Lily's very sensitive!"

"I am not!" Still, the Exceed glanced around, fearful that perhaps Laxus was hiding behind a tree or something, just waiting to jump out and scare him. "Thunder is merely something I do not enjoy. That is all."

Gajeel grunted before turning his head up back to the sky. "Whatever. You're here now anyhow, so I guess we don't gotta even go back to that stinken guildhall. We can go straight to my place. So I can practice! I gotta get my whole set perfectly right." Then, snickering, he said, "And I gotta rewrite your song, eh, Levy?"

"Really, that's not-" she tried, but he just shook his head.

"So you comin' with us? Or what?" He was turning to walk off then. "Shrimp?"

"Well, Jet and Droy…" Then she smiled and shook her head. "I guess I can go listen to your music for a bit."

It was Lily's turn to snicker. "If you can call it that."

"Hey, cat," Gajeel grumbled. "Laxus is just a call away."

"Don't joke about that," the Exceed responded over Levy's giggles that time. Glancing around, he added, "Seriously."

Sometimes a song was just a song. But other times, it was a lot more.

 


	4. Chapter 4

  


For a day or two, Mirajane was pretty down about herself still. And after all that Laxus had gone through. All he'd done for her, it seemed, was drive home the fact that she very much so wasn't the great fixer of the guildhall. She was just, as he'd told her, a barmaid. That was all.

He did everything to make her feel better. If he wasn't at her mercy on a typical basis, he was those couple of days. He didn't argue, didn't smart off. Sarcasm wasn't even in his wheel house. He just tried in vain to get her back to her peppy, blissful naivety that everyone loved so much.

Nothing worked.

Then the news broke. And her happiness rivaled even the new couple's.

Gajeel and Levy were dating!

Apparently, and she'd hounded Levy on this for an hour at least, after their outing with her and Laxus, she and Gajeel had some sort of breakthrough in their relationship and taken things to the next level.

It was so…amazing!

She must have gushed on about it for hours. Mirajane, the bridge between friendship and courtship. The greatest counselor of all times. And, as it turned out, the most annoying woman Laxus knew.

But that wasn't news to him. Not at all.

Sigh. It was like he had to pick between two extremes with that woman. Either he had to deal with her moping and wailing, or he had to put up with her bouncy and giggling and…

Gah!

She was his demon though and, hate it as much as he did, he loved her. A lot.

He did not, however, love the Salamander. Or like him. Most of the time. Tolerate was more of the right word. The blue cat though was a very different story.

"Hey, Mirajane?" Happy asked one day as he stood up on the counter, staring at her. She was on her break, actually, and seated at the bar with Laxus, who was listening to her, once again, detail to him just how the whole date with Levy and Gajeel had gone down. As if he hadn't been there. Or orchestrated the whole thing.

Only his demon…

"Hmmm?" She turned away from Laxus to stare at Happy then. "Did you want a fish or something? Lisanna's on right now, not me. Or did you want me to sing you a song?"

"No," he said slowly. "I didn't. But now that you mention it, do you got any new ones about fish?"

"Well-"

"What," Laxus grumbled, as Mirajane's break time was very brief and precious, "do you want, cat?"

"Oh." Happy grinned at them then. "Well, Mira, I heard all about how you set up Gajeel and Levy."

"Really?"

Ugh. Skewer him. Please.

…The cat. Not Laxus. He rather liked his body intact.

"What did you hear?" Mirajane was full on facing the Exceed then, leaning against the bar and everything. He had her full attention, only, truly, because he was getting ready to talk about her. Mirajane loved to gossip. So much so that she had no problem with making herself the target. "Happy?"

"You know," he said with a shrug. "Just that you and them went out to eat and then bam! They were dating."

"Well, there was a lot of psychological stuff in between, but yes," she said with a nod. "It was a lot like that. Wasn't it, dragon?"

He narrowed his eyes at Happy. "Get to the point."

"Right." The cat was refusing to stare at Laxus too long, hoping to stay in his good graces for another day. "You got Natsu and Lucy so happy again and Ever and Elfman haven't murdered one another yet, so I was just wonderin', Mira, if maybe…"

"Yes?" She looked so dang giddy that Laxus thought she was gonna faint. "What is it, Happy?"

"I…I want you to set me up with Carla."

Laxus blinked as Mirajane let out this really weird squeal that he was pretty sure he only heard thanks to his dragon senses.

"Demon," he whispered. "Calm down."

"Oh, Happy! You've made me so…so…"

"Happy?" the cat suggested.

"Yes!"

"It is my namesake, after all."

Ugh. Never mind. Skewer Laxus. Right threw the ol' noggin. Please.

"Happy!" they heard then, called from over by the front of the guildhall. It was Natsu and Lucy, of course, both staring over at him. "We're leaving. Are you coming, little buddy, or not?"

"I gotta go, Mira," the cat said, his wings forming. "But you'll help me, right? I've tried a lot on my own and all of Natsu's advice kinda sucks, so-"

"I'll help you," she said, giggling again. "I'll spend all day figuring it out, okay? Though this isn't quite counseling…this is more match making…but I'll make it work. I'm an expert at both, of course."

"Of course."

"Happy." Natsu was rather impatient that day, apparently. "Come on."

"I'll write you so many songs about fish too," Mirajane went on as the cat took off. "And-"

"Mire, you're doing him the favor," Laxus pointed out. "Stop thanking him!"

"Bye, Mira." Happy grinned back at them. "And thanks."

Then they were gone. But Laxus' headache wasn't. Not by a long shot.

"Dragon-"

"No."

"Lax-"

"I said no."

"Please?"

"No, Mirajane," he said, shaking his head. Then, in a lower voice, he said, "Besides, isn't this, like, bestiality or something?"

"What?" Mira would have choked, had she had anything in her mouth. "Laxus-"

"I'm just checking. 'cause I ain't cool with that."

"They're both the same…species." His question had clearly flustered her as her fair skin heated up. "So no."

"Well," he grumbled. "You can't blame me for being confused."

"In this case? That that would even cross your mind? Yeah, Lax, I can."

"In any event, I'm not helping."

"Of course you are."

"No," he told her with a swift shake of his head. "That ain't my thing. Animals ain't supposed to talk and…have relationships. They're supposed to mate and shut the hell up about it."

"Laxus!" That time he got a hit to the arm. "Behave."

"Me? I'm not the one walkin' around like you're so high and mighty. Like it was some sorta godly work, puttin' together Gajeel and the Levy. Wow, Mirajane. You made two people that everyone thought were screwing together anyhow. Good freaking job."

She blinked. Then she smiled. "Aw, Laxus. Are you jealous?"

"What? No. I'm screwing you. What the hell do I need with her? Or him?"

That got him another hit. "I meant about how you think that I'm getting all the praise in this and you're getting none," she explained. "Because, Lax, trust me; I am telling  _everyone_  that this was a team effort."

"Yeah," he grumbled, none too happy about that either. "I know."

"So don't worry, okay? This is something we're doing together. A public service, really."

Why did he put up with her again?

"Mira," Lisanna was complaining about then. "Are you almost done with your break? Kinana took off today, remember? I'm all alone!"

"Coming," she sighed before leaning over to press a kiss against his cheek. "Love you, dragon."

Oh yeah. That's why.

"Yeah," he grumbled as he hooked his headphones back on. "Back at you."

"You're so cute."

Cute. He was cute.

Ha.

His demon was something else.

But with her gone, so was his desire to sit up at the bar. When he stood, he immediately spotted Bickslow, who was moping off in the corner about Lisanna having to work, along with Freed, who was waving him over.

To get to them though, he had to pass Gajeel and Levy. Barf. He liked it better when he just assumed they were banging. Now that he had confirmation that they were at least dating, it made it kinda…creepy.

Like that Carla and Happy stuff. Which, for the record, he was not so sure yet didn't fall into bestiality. Gross.

It wasn't like Gajeel and Levy were overly…into one another or anything like that. In fact they appeared mostly as they always had. Just sitting there with one another, hardly talking as she looked over some books and he bragged to Lily about his many accomplishments. Randomly though, the two would glance at one another and blush.

Childish.

But better than two cats, Laxus figured.

Sigh. How did the demon always manage to get him into these messes?

"Hi, boss," Bickslow sighed as the man came to sit with him and Freed. "Are you here to put me out of my misery?"

"She has been working for half an hour, Bickslow," Laxus complained. "You are not that lonely."

"I am though." He even sniffled. Dear lord. "My babies understand, don't ya, babies?"

"Papa," they all cried, circling around him. "Poor Papa."

"Poor me."

"Anyways," Laxus said before looking at Freed. "Mirajane wants me to help two animals get frisky."

Freed blinked. "Come again?"

"The blue one came to her wanting to hook up with the dress wearin' one," Laxus said with a shrug. "And she's all into match making."

"Counseling."

"I think it's all the same to her."

"She put me and Lissy together," Bickslow sighed.

"She did not," Laxus said with a frown. "She set you up on a date with one of her modeling friends who called you repulsive and made you depressed."

"That wasn't Lisanna?"

"No."

"Huh. Then I've been harboring these feelings of deep hatred mixed with attraction for her for no reason."

"Bickslow-"

"I'm just teasing." He cackled some, lifting his head. "But Mira kinda set me and Lisanna up."

"How?"

"Remember? I was all depressed about that other chick and my Lissy, boy, she feels sympathy like a madman. She came and talked me through it and, well, now we screw regularly and I'mma get her name tattooed somewhere on my body. The end."

"I hate you guys," Laxus said with a shake of his head as Freed ran through the events in his own mind, just to see if they added up. "So much."

"We love ya too, boss! One big happy… Oh. Sorry, Freed." Bickslow rubbed the back of his neck. "You don't got a Strauss. Too bad. I'd share with ya, but I think mine is missin' a few parts for ya, if you know what I mean."

Ignoring the jab, Freed said, "I am content with waiting for Laxus, thank you."

"Right here, freaks," he grumbled. "And no, sharing Lisanna with anyone… No. Just never say that again."

"Oy, boss, it was a joke. I don't even let other people look at her if I can help it! Especially when she's in her sexy little kitty mode," he said with more snickers.

"Meow," his babies agreed.

"Meow is right."

"This is getting weird." Laxus turned up his music. "And I was just propositioned to help a cat get some from another cat, so I'm definitely a good judge of weird."

"Meow."

Laxus stuck around till close, waiting for Mirajane. They would be going back to his place again and, honestly, he was ready to just relax.

Mira was never down with that though.

"So?" she prompted after closing up the guildhall and making it off the grounds.

"So what?" Laxus only blinked, glancing down at her. "Was I supposed to be doing something or-"

"You were supposed to be thinking up ways to get Happy and Carla together, of course."

"Oh." Gross. "Well…they're both cats, right?"

"Right."

"And don't cats…well…go through heat or whatever? So just wait till then and- Mira, stop hitting me! I'm being helpful!"

"You're being gross!"

"No! Why else would he want to be with her? Clearly Natsu and Lisanna's little kitten is a full fledge cat now and he wants some. Why's that my fault?"

"You're so stupid! And why does Happy have to… Ew, Laxus."

"What? Aren't we all adults here? I mean, what do you think Gajeel and Levy-"

"Shut up. No. Laxus, you're ruining everything."

"Wait a minute," he said, finally having to reach over and grab her hands to get her to stop batting at him. "Mira… I mean, wouldn't that make you happy? That's kinda, like, part of the whole couple thing, which you're so into. Pairing people off and stuff. You know, Natsu and Lucy screw too. And, apparently, your sister and Bickslow are freaks, so-"

"Laxus, you're ruining everything!"

Laughing then, he released her hands. "Sorry. I just-"

"It's not about that to me," she told him, a frown etched into her features as she stopped walking just to glare at him. "That's not what it means to love someone or to be with them. It's a lot of other things. We're a lot of other things…aren't we?"

"Sure."

"Laxus-"

"Demon, I just think it's…weird. For two cats to… I dunno. Maybe I'm just immature."

"Maybe?"

Giving her a look, he started to walk again. "I'll give the little cat some tips, huh? To…not sleep with the other cat, I guess. Whatever. But I'll help you, if it means this much to you."

"It does." She was quick to hook one of her arms in his, grinning slightly. "But Laxus?"

"Hmmm?"

"We're…more than just sex, aren't we?"

"Babe," he told her after pressing a kiss to her head. "We're so much more that I can't even begin to explain it."

* * *

"Have you ever, I dunno," Laxus sighed as he sat off in a corner, Happy standing on the table in front of him. "Thought about leaving more to the imagination?"

"What do you mean?" Happy was munching on the fish at the time and just cocked his head to the side. He'd woken up extra early and snuck out without Natsu or Lucy just to get up there to talk to Mirajane. But she'd gotten a shipment of something in and was stocking, so she said that Laxus was going to help him out first.

Man to man.

Err…

"Well, look at the other cats," Laxus said with a slight shrug. "I mean, Gajeel's wears pants. And Carla wears clothes. But you're just walking around, showin' everything off."

Happy frowned. "I'm more free this way."

"Yeah, well, once Carla's seen what you got to offer, what's left for her to think about, huh?"

"Think about?"

"Ain't you ever wondered what the frog one looks like? How his wings are and stuff?"

"Ew! I don't wanna date Frosch!"

"I didn't say that you did, numb nuts," Laxus grumbled. "Just… Never mind. The point is, you should start dressing or something."

"I dunno…"

"Not to mention," Laxus said, reaching over to poke the Exceed in the stomach. "You might want to conceal this."

"Hey!" Happy turned from him then, a fish still poised in his hands to be eaten. "I'm working on it, alright?"

"Well, work harder. I mean, sheesh, at least the black one has those bulging muscles going for him," Laxus complained. "How do you expect to compete with that, Happy? Huh?"

"Well…"

"Do you want Carla or don't you?"

"I do!"

"Alright then."

"So what then?" The Exceed cocked his head to the side. "I just work out some, stop eating so much, buy some pants, and then ask her out? Or-"

"That," Laxus told him, "is the demon's deal. Not mine."

"But she said to talk to you about all this."

"I did talk to you about everything. Everything I could help you with."

"Yeah, but… How did you get Mirajane to like you?"

Sneering if only slightly, Laxus said, "By being me."

"But being myself hasn't worked up to this point! Why-"

"I didn't say be you," Laxus told him. "I said be me."

"Rude, crude, and lewd?"

With narrowed eyes, Laxus said, "I ain't like the damn Salamander or Lucy, cat. I don't think you're cute. So unless you want to become a scorch mark, I'd start talking to me with some respect. Got it?"

Grinning at him then, Happy got out an, "A-Aye, sir," before, suddenly, the guildhall doors opened with a bang.

"Happy! Here you are."

It was Natsu and Lucy, of course, the Salamander rushing over to the table, an accusation on the tip of his tongue.

"I should have known that you stole him, Laxus," Natsu accused. "You've always wanted an Exceed. Well, you can't have him! I'll fight you for him!"

Laxus blinked. Then he shook his head, not even dignifying that with a response.

"Happy." Lucy came to pick him up and give him a tight squeeze. The cat seemed confused by this though and just stared up at her. "We thought you'd run away."

"Why'd you think that?"

"Because you left us a note, little buddy," Natsu said. "That said you had run away."

"That was just because I was hopin' when I got back that you'd be feeling sorry for me and bake me a fish flavored cake or something."

"What?" Lucy wasn't so into hugging anymore. "Happy-"

"It was a cry for attention! If you would give me more of it, it wouldn't be needed."

"You're such a brat."

"You're the weirdo that won't stop hugging me."

And she wouldn't either. But, with one last squeeze, she let him drop. Right onto the floor.

"Lucy!"

"Oops."

Natsu was still focused on the bigger picture. "If you didn't steal him then, Laxus-"

"Trust me, I didn't."

"-why are you two together?"

Happy, who was getting back to his feet and back to eating his fish, said with his mouth full, "He's helping me win over Carla!"

"That's…sweet," Lucy said slowly, glancing at the other blond. He just gave her a dark look.

"It's the demon's idea," he said.

"Likely story." Natsu shook his head. "I'm still just wondering how you broke in, took Happy, and-"

"I'm not having this conversation. At all." Getting to his feet, Laxus let out a loud, "Leaving, demon!" before heading to the door. He had a way with words.

"Wait!" She came running out of the back quick as, well, lightning. "Laxus, you can't- Oh. You're all here."

"Here? So you're in on it too, Mira?" Natsu shook his head. "No, that can't be right. You… I got it now! This is a surprise party!"

"Natsu, quit while you're ahead," Happy whispered.

"And when was that?" Lucy retorted. "Ever?"

"Where are you going, Laxus?" Mira asked then as she came closer. "I mean, this is great. We have our next person here and our original two. It's kinda like a before and after."

"I don't think you understand what a before and after is."

"Happy," Lucy said then, glancing down at him. "Why did you go to Mirajane and Laxus with this? You could have asked me and Natsu. I mean, we're together, right? We're just as good of people to ask. I-"

"I get it now," Natsu said loudly. "You were asking Laxus about Carla and getting dating advice."

Laxus turned back just to glare at the other slayer. "You know, someone should have you checked out by a real doctor. There has to be something wrong up there."

"I have asked Natsu for advice," Happy was telling Lucy then. "But it's all crummy."

"I resent that," Natsu said. "I told you that if you want to get Carla interested in you, you have to act completely uninterested in being anything, but her friend, and then, one day, sneak up on her in the showers and-"

Mira's eyes widened. "You told me that you guys got together after you came home from a job and he just asked you out on a date, Lucy."

"He did," she said, frowning at him. "So what are you-"

"Erza left a book over at your apartment and I took a peek at it," he said with a shrug. "Worked like charm in the book, so I don't see why-"

"Tell me that I'm not the only intelligent one here," Laxus groaned. "Please."

"Laxus told me that I need to buy some clothes," Happy told them all then. "To leave more to the imagination."

Lucy about choked. "What?"

"Laxus," Mirajane complained. "I said to tell him about all the sweet things you do for me. Not…whatever it is you two discussed."

"What sweet things?" Lucy asked. "You always complain about nearly everything he does."

"Lovingly."

"Right."

"I think the point is," Natsu spoke up again, "that the ship has sailed, Happy's not ever going to be with Carla, and we should just go out on a job instead."

"Natsu!" Happy glared at him. "How could you say that?"

"I'm sorry little buddy. I just mean… It's been years."

'I took years for you and Lucy to get together."

"Yeah, but Lucy was at least my friends during those years."

"Carla and I are friends!" When everyone just stared at him, he said, "It's true! Really!"

"Alright, alright, make the damn cat shut up, Salamander," Laxus grumbled. With a groan, he walked back over to them to toss an arm around the demon's shoulders all while staring down at the Exceed. "You know what, cat? I'm in a good mood today."

"Really? This is good mood?" Lucy mumbled to Natsu.

"Well, he hasn't told anyone to fuck off yet."

"Good point."

"And," Laxus went on, just to make Mirajane smile. Man, he was growing soft. "I'll make a deal with you."

"Really?"

"Yeah. If you, the Salamander, and the bimbo-"

"Why do I get called a name?" Lucy complained.

"-go on a very long job, very far away, for, oh, three weeks and I don't have to see your ugly mugs until it's up," the older slayer went on, "I'll do you up right, just like everyone else me and Mira have…counseled. Me, you, the demon, and the other cat will all go somewhere, talk this shit out, and then bam! You got a little feline action going on, yeah?"

"Are you drunk?" Mira frowned at the last part. "Laxus?"

"Shut up. I'm doing this for you."

"What did you just tell me?"

Groaning, he dropped his arm. "Fine. Let the cat flounder around with this other cat. Like I care. I was trying to be nice. All I've been trying to do is be nice! I-"

"Three weeks, huh?" Natsu thought about it. "What sorta job do you have in mind?"

"Like I would know off the top of my damn head, Natsu," Laxus complained, turning his anger onto the other male then. "Honestly, sometimes-"

"No one's going on a job," Mirajane told him. "I mean, you can, but not in exchange for anything. Me and Laxus are going to help you, Happy, because we want to. You clearly love Carla-"

"More than anything." Then, frowning down at his fish, he said, "Well, more than most things."

"Then we'll figure it out. Promise."

"I never knew it was really that important to you," Lucy remarked, staring down at Happy. "I thought you had more fun-"

"Being rejected?" Happy frowned up at her. "No, Lucy, rejection isn't fun."

"Yeah, Luce." Natsu crossed his arms. "It's not."

"Oh, whoever rejected you?"

"Laxus does all the time for fights!"

"You know, demon," Laxus was saying then. "That someone's going to have to talk to Carla."

"I've already figured that out, before you started trying to run things."

"Oh?"

Nodding, she said, "I'll just ask Wendy to come hangout with me. Easy. Carla never lets her do anything alone."

"With all the Exceeds just running away these days," Lucy remarked, "I'd be shocked if it wasn't the other way around."

"Can you stop bring that up already?" Happy complained. "This isn't the kinda of attention I was going for."

"Then Happy is going to show up," Mira went on, "at my house, and it'll be such a shock. Laxus, you'll have been napping in the back."

"Seems likely."

"And will come out and be Happy's wing man."

"Great plan, demon." Laxus kissed her head. His random bout of wanting to stick around was dying out then and he was about ready to take off for real.

"Real great." Natsu rubbed his hands together. "So where do I come in?"

"W-Well… This is kind of a couple thing."

"Right. Me, Luce, you, Laxus-"

"No, no," Mirajane said with a shake of her head. "When I said couple, I mean, well, me and Laxus."

"And me and Lucy."

"No, Natsu. Not you. Or Lucy. At all."

"I don't think I'm following you."

"Natsu." Lucy patted him on the shoulder. "We have a date planned on…whatever day it is they're doing this."

"Really?"

"Uh-huh." Giving him a look, she said, "You didn't forget did you?"

"Uh-"

"Natsu."

"I'm sorry!" Then, looking to Mirajane, he said, "I can't go to your little get together thing. Me and Lucy have a very important date. Rain check, yeah?"

"But Lucy," Happy spoke up, his normal mischievous look in his eyes. "Mirajane never said when this is. So how could you possibly-"

"If you want me to do this thing, cat, shut the hell up," Laxus grumbled softly under his breath. He'd even pay for the made up Lucy and Natsu date if it meant that the Salamander wouldn't be dropping in on the one the demon would be making with Wendy and Carla.

"It's okay, Natsu," Mirajane said slowly then, glancing at Lucy. If he was that willing to believe that he'd forgotten some fake date, she wondered what else the other woman could trick him into. "Maybe another time, huh?"

Not if Laxus was involved, there wouldn't be.

The date of the little get together was actually about a week later, as Natsu and Lucy had to go off on a job, taking Happy along, and then later, Wendy was busy with one with Erza. But when, finally, they were all in town together, Mirajane got a day off and went for it.

Wendy was more than happy to accept Mira's offer to have lunch over at her house. Carla seemed fine with it too.

"Should we invite Lucy?" Wendy asked. "Or Erza? Or-"

"Nope," Mirajane said. "We just never get to spend any time together, you know?"

That made the teenager excited, if only a little. She always looked to Lucy and Erza for immediate guidance, but Mirajane was definitely at the top as well.

When she showed up for lunch, she was a little disappointed though to find out that Lisanna wasn't around. She was another one of the older girls that she really looked up to. But Mirajane said it would just be them, so she wasn't that upset.

They were in the middle of eating though when the doorbell rang. And, as Mirajane excused herself to answer it, Wendy just went back to nibbling at the food on her plate.

"Please," Carla whispered when she heard what sounded very much so like her male counterpart. "Tell me that is not-"

"Guys," they heard then as Mirajane came back into the kitchen. "Happy's come by to speak with me for awhile. You don't mind if he joins us at lunch, do you?"

"Of course not," Wendy was quick to say, smiling at him. "What did you need Mira for though, Happy?"

"Ah, well, she just told me that she'd help me…um…write a song about fish soon," Happy said as he came into the room. "And-"

"Demon! Who was at the door?"

"Laxus is here?" Wendy asked as Carla eyed Happy wearily. He just flew up to the table before holding out the flowers in his hands to her.

"These are for you."

"How did you know I was here?"

"Er…huh?"

"How did you know to bring flowers?" she asked. "If I-"

"I forgot. He was napping in my bedroom," Mirajane told Wendy with a shrug. "It was Happy, Lax!"

"No need to yell. I'm right here." And he was then, coming into the dining room to stare at them. What was he supposed to say again? Mirajane had given him lines and everything. Sigh. "Oh. Wow. Are you guys eating?"

"Mirajane invited us over for lunch," Wendy told him. "Did you wanna join us?"

"Well," he said slowly. "I am here, anyhow."

"Anyhow," Carla repeated slowly, still suspicious. Happy just grinned at her.

"Hi, Laxus."

Clearly his throat, he tried to remember his next line. "Your Salamander friend isn't around, is he? You know that the two of us are quite…quarrelsome."

So the demon wasn't a script writer. Big whoop.

Wendy just stared at him before saying, "I guess you two can be…quarrelsome sometimes."

"Let me get you and Happy plates," Mirajane said, dashing off into the kitchen. Laxus just took a seat at the head of the table, glancing around at the cats and the teen.

"So," he said slowly. "You guys and Mirajane were…talking, yeah?"

"Uh-huh," the other slayer was quick to say. "She was just telling me about how great she was at counseling people and how she put together Gajeel and Levy."

"Gajeel and Levy," Laxus whispered, "put together Gajeel and Levy. The demon just wasted my night trying to though. But don't say anything about that to her, alright?"

Obviously, that wasn't in the script, but Laxus felt like it needed to be said.

"That sounds about how it went," Carla agreed. Happy just grinned some more.

"I think that Mirajane is a miracle worker," he said. "She's very talented."

"Of course the demon's talented," Laxus grumbled. "Just…not at this."

"Laxus," Wendy said with a frown. "Why would you say something like that?"

Because he was annoyed that she had him on a script.

But then she was coming back into the room, carrying plates for him and Happy, which was just as well. At least she hadn't overheard him talking about her.

"Okay," she said as she came to reclaim her seat. "Now, where were we, Wendy?"

"Uh, you were saying that Gajeel and Levy are forever in your debt or-"

"I don't know if I phrased it quite like that."

"No, I think you-"

"Wow," Laxus said. He remembered this part of the script. "Gajeel and Levy are quite the pair, Mirajane. You sure are great at this kind of stuff, huh? You bridge the gap between friendship and companionship. Good for you."

"Good for us, dragon," she corrected. "You were there too, remember?"

"I was," he agreed. "But I'm sure glad that none of you need that sort of counseling. I mean you and Carla are the best of friends, huh, Wendy?"

The younger slayer blushed. "I guess you could say that."

Still, Carla just glanced between them. "And what of it?"

"But even the best of friends, Laxus," Happy reminded, "go through rough patches. Think of Natsu and Lucy. Mirajane's first two clients."

Great. So the cat had gotten a script too.

"That's right," Mirajane said with a nod of her head. "I guess you could say that I have my share of success stories."

"But demon," Laxus sighed. The script was growing old to him already. "Aren't you forgetting about Evergreen and Elfman?"

With a shrug, she said, "They're a work in progress. And I'm certain that with a few more sessions with me, they'll be all patched up."

"That's our Mirajane," Happy said with a thumbs up.

"Yes," Laxus said through clenched teeth. "That's our Mirajane."

Even Wendy was starting to pick up on something being off, if only a little, but being who she was, took to only smiling at the others. Carla though just rolled her eyes, though she didn't intervene. She figured that she'd go ahead and get through whatever it was that they were trying to do so that they could all just move on with their lives.

Mira was grinning too, mainly because she hadn't thought that Laxus would really go through with all of that. Maybe they were more than just sex. But she had to stay focused. If she thought too much about Laxus, she'd start complimenting him and, well, once she went down that road, she usually had a hard time coming back off it.

But he just did so many things so well! She really thought that he was the best boyfriend she'd ever had. And she wasn't just saying that. He was-

Oh. Oops.

"Well," Mirajane began, knowing that she needed to get back on track. "I just really can pick up on these things, you know? When two people are in need of some help to…keep things together?"

"Keep things together?" Wendy repeated, frowning. "W-What do you… Carla, you should have told me if there was something wrong. I-"

"Given the way that Happy is beaming at me right now, child," the white Exceed said with a very pointed glare the others way. "I highly doubt that any of this has to do with you."

Still smiling just as brightly, Happy said, "I don't know if you've noticed, Carla, but I've bought a pair of pants yesterday."

She blinked. "Why would I notice that? You're not even wearing them."

"Well, it's hot," he defended. "And-"

"What difference does it make anyhow?" she asked. "I mean-"

"You know," he said, almost bashful then. "I wanted to leave more to the imagination."

Laxus couldn't do it anymore. He snickered a little. In his defense though, Wendy had cracked a grin too. Mirajane just gave them both glares in response.

"So what?" Carla asked then after her blush died down some. "We're here to…be counseled? Happy-"

"Just as friends," he was quick to say. "Or as more than friends. I have no preference, but…preferably the last one."

"That means you do have a-"

"What are you going to counsel them over, Mira?" Wendy asked then. Carla gave her a look for it.

"Do not encourage this."

"I'm interested," she defended.

"Ah, demon, you know me too well," Laxus said then when he easily spotted not one, but three salt shakers in the center of the table. She must have bought more just for him and his needs. That's his Mirajane.

Ha ha.

"Shush, Laxus, before you ruin this too."

No, that was more like his Mirajane. Truly.

To Carla, Mira said then, "You know, I think that regardless of Happy's feelings for you, I think it's clear that you have some rather unnecessary defense against them. It's almost like you're…guarding yourself from something."

"You don't gotta guard nothing, Carla," Happy told her with a nod. "I'll protect you from everything!"

"I'mma need more than salt for this," Laxus sighed as he got up to get a beer. "A lot more."

"There is no…this," Carla said. "Because there is no reason to have any discussion on our friendship at all."

"But Carla," Wendy reasoned, smiling at her friend. "Happy went through all this trouble. And so did Mirajane. And Laxus…well…he's here, anyways."

"And? This is none of any of your businesses," she said simply, holding her head up high. "And honestly, Happy, I am less pleased with you now than I would have been before for trying to trick me. And with that I…I…"

"You what?' Wendy asked as Mira stared at the cat too.

But it was behind then, Laxus, standing there in the doorway. He had two boxes of Darjeeling tea packets, staring hard at her, mouthing something along the lines of, ' _One date. Twenty more boxes.'_

And who could refuse an offer like that?

Recovering quickly, she looked at Happy then. "You may take me out, once, to get something to eat. That is all. And no more trying to trick me into things. I am not fond of tomcats and you are lucky to being with that I even consider us friends."

"Friends?" Happy nearly jumped for joy. "We're friends?"

Carla just hopped down off the table. Laxus had disappeared from the doorway, but Carla had her doubts anyways about him having the twenty boxes on him. And she was certain that they were not to be seen by Mirajane, less break her spirit. He'd have to give them to her on a later date.

"Come, Wendy," the white Exceed said. "This was…semi-pleasant, Mirajane. Thank you for lunch."

"Carla," Wendy complained, rushing to follow her. Over her shoulder though, she called out her thanks to Mira and Happy alike, as well as one to Laxus, who just grunted in reply.

Then there were three.

"I'm sorry, Happy," Mira said with a frown. "I mean, I hardly got to do anything. I-"

"Did you hear that?" Happy did jump then, into the air, before going to slam into Mirajane's arms. "She called me her friend! And we're going out to eat! Thank you, thank you, thank you! You're amazing, Mirajane."

"Really?" She was smiling slightly then. "You think so?"

"Yeah! You were great. And it's even better that it didn't take long."

Laxus was coming back then, beer in hand. "What? Is the party over?'

Happy just snuggled closer to the woman. "I love you, Mira. You don't even have to write me songs about fish anymore to make me love you either. I'll love you forever."

"I love you too, Happy."

Laxus just sighed as he went to take his seat at the table once more. Another day, another save by the Thunder God. And did anyone thank him? Realize how great he was? Going to reimburse him for all the tea he was going to have to buy?

_No_.

Well…Maybe Freed. Once he told him about it.

Still though, as he glanced at the demon and Happy, he figured that sometimes, it wasn't about the praise. Or the glory.

It was about the fact that he very much so was going to get laid that night.

And…Mira's happiness.

"I gotta go home and tell Natsu and Lucy," Happy said as he wiggled free of Mirajane. "Thank you so much though. And lunch was great!"

"Remember," Laxus grumbled. "Lay off the food a little, pudgy."

Happy just patted his stomach. "Aye, sir!"

After he left, Mira took to smiling at Laxus.

"And you said that I couldn't do it," she told him. "You said that I wasn't any good at this. But look! I hardly even had to say a thing to Carla to get her to change her mind."

"You got me, demon," Laxus sighed as she got up to kiss his head. "You got me."

 


	5. Chapter 5

  


If ever you want someone to give you a word of recommendation, there was no need to look further than Happy. He told everyone in the guildhall about what a great thing Mirajane had done for him. About how she'd gotten Carla to not only admit that yes, they very much so were friends, but also to go out on a date with him!

Which, for the record, went horribly and ended with Carla telling him that there would never be another one. Not that Happy took her seriously. After all, she'd turned him down for years and, well, eventually he got one out of her, didn't he? So that meant that if he tried even harder for a few more years, he'd get another one, right?

Man, if there wasn't ever a more optimistic person…cat…thing, Laxus had never met one. And, honestly, it had Laxus fearful that someone else would be requesting the demon's help soon enough. He kept hoping though that he'd let her end on a high note and be done with it. But if she kept coming up with more people for them to help out, well, eventually he'd run out of ways to backhandedly save her.

The tides seemed to be working in his favor too. For a good two weeks, he was able to take jobs and leave her all alone without worrying about her being depressed or anything. She was in a good mood. She'd accomplished her dream. And now? Now he was hoping they could put that all behind them.

And you'd think that the people to help him make that come to fruition would be his bodyguards. But nope. Na-ah. In fact, it was one of them that spurred on the next counseling session.

"Demon," Laxus called out as he knocked on Mirajane's front door. "You home? I smell you."

When the door opened, it was to reveal a less than excited looking Mirajane. But Laxus didn't pick up on that.

"I just got home from a job," he complained. "And you weren't at the apartment to tell me what a great job I did. You weren't at the guild to serve me beer. So what, Mira, could you possibly doing at home that's so-"

"Bickslow broke up with Lisanna."

Oh.

He blinked. "And that meant that you couldn't come over and make me dinner why exactly?"

"Goodbye, Laxus."

'Wait," he groaned, moving to put his arm out and stop the door from slamming in his face. "I'm just messing around."

"Well, that's clearly not the time for that. Lisanna's super upset and-"

"Mirajane, this can't be right though," Laxus insisted. "When I stopped by the guild to look for you, I saw Bickslow and he seemed fine."

"Oh, he's more than fine," they heard then and, glancing passed Mirajane, Laxus found her little sister sitting in the living room, glaring with her usually vibrant eyes that were then streaked with red. She really looked upset. Huh. "Of course he is. Because he got rid of the annoying brat that he feels like he has to haul around for no reason-"

"What," Laxus groaned, pushing his way inside then, "happened?"

It was clear to him that if he was going to get his demon back, he would have to get rid of her sister. Err, heal her sister. He totally meant heal.

"Why do you care?"

Uh, gee, Lisanna, because you were taking the time with his girlfriend away over your petty drama? Ever think of that?

"Because," he grumbled as Mira shut the door behind him, "I can see that you're upset. And-"

"I'm sure it's your fault."

"My fault? What do you mean? I don't have anything to do with-"

"He only ever does things to please you," she retorted with a near snarl as he came closer. Laxus had to admit, feisty Lisanna was at least a bit more interesting. Her standing up to him though? He could definitely do without that. "I be that he did this to get on your good side. What, Laxus? Am I not good enough for you?"

"For me? No!"

"Laxus!"

"Mira, stop hitting me," he complained. "I meant because you're the only one that's good enough for me."

She gave him one last hit. "Well, think before you speak. That sounded really mean."

Lisanna just kept glaring at him. "What did you tell him, Laxus? Huh? About me? That made him not want to-"

"I didn't do anything!"

"Then what happened?'

"How the heck should I know?"

"Because you know everything about him!"

"Look, girly," he growled, wagging a finger at her then. "You're gonna learn who you're talking to and learn it quick. I am the  _Thunder God_. Understand? Thunder God. I rule everything. Always. I-"

"Laxus." Mira frowned at him. "You're not helping anything. Now, you know as well as I do that there's no way that Bickslow would willingly breakup with Lisanna."

"Why do we know that? Huh? They're both young, vibrant, annoying people," he grumbled. "Maybe he doesn't wanna be tied down anymore. People break up. It happens. And Lisanna, honestly, he wasn't that great of a catch."

"He was the perfect catch!"

"A tattooed man with a bunch of creepy, magical babies is the prefect catch?" He was skeptical, clearly. "Though I will say that he has impeccable taste in idols-"

"Laxus."

"-but," he kept up as Mira gave him another look, "if it's over, Lisanna, then it's just over. Things happen. People change. Things change. You guys outlasted any of our expectations. I mean seriously, Lisanna. Nothing lasts forever." Then, before Mirajane could hit him, he added, "Except me and the demon. We're divine."

Lisanna narrowed her eyes. "Just leave me alone, you big jerk!"

"Lisanna, I didn't do anything."

"Why else would he break up with me? Huh? What's changed? We were fine yesterday and today he just-"

"I don't know! I wasn't even here! How could I have had anything to do with this? Huh? You're, like, seriously not even thinking."

"Okay, okay." Mira went to grab Laxus arm and drag him off. "Go wait for me in my bedroom, alright? Me and Lisanna need to talk this out and-"

"No," he said, shaking the woman off. "I ain't sticking around for this shit. I'm sorry, Lisanna, that you're hurt, and I love your sister-"

"Aw," Mira cooed.

"-which means I sorta like you, but I'm not-"

"Wait!" It was the younger Strauss sister's turn to grab onto his other arm and stare up at him. Her eyes were still full of tears, but did look somewhat hopeful. "You'll go talk to him, won't you, Laxus?"

"What? No." He shook that one off too. "This isn't-"

"Laxus, you have to," Mirajane told him. "You're our way back in."

"Why do you want back in?" the man growled. "He clearly hurt you, Lisanna."

"He didn't mean it. I know that if you just go talk to him-"

"Lisanna." He was the one moving to grab her then, though it was by the shoulders as he stared down at her. "I'mma give you some advice, alright? If a guy's done, fine. You be done too. Don't go crawling back, begging him to stay. You don't need to do that. It's just…pathetic. And you're not pathetic. I know that you're hurt and I know that this will take some time, but I'll set you up with a way better guy. I have tons of friends. Ones that will make Bickslow shit bricks when he sees. Okay?"

Sniffling, she just said, "I love him."

"No, kid, you don't."

"How do you know?"

"I just do, alright? He's…not good for you. And-"

"Yes, he is!" She shoved him off then. "And you're the only person I have that can get him back. Please, Laxus."

"Dragon." Mirajane was frowning once more, giving him a look. "Just go down and talk to him, alright? And then bring him back here? Please?"

"No, Mira. I'm not going to do that. I-"

"You have to."

"Why?"

"You just said that you love me, right? There's your answer."

"Demon-"

"Go."

Lisanna sniffled some more. "Please?"

"I hate you guys."

"That's great and everything, Lax, but I'm kinda on a time crunch here," Mira said. "So get going, huh?"

"You're pushing it, demon," he grumbled though he was headed out anyways. And, though it did cross his mind to just go home from there, he knew better. That was practically issuing a death warrant as far as Mirajane was concerned. Ignore a direct order? Yeah right. Even Laxus wasn't that brave.

He found Bickslow just as he'd left him; down at the bar, goofing off. When Laxus arrived he was actually in the middle of teasing Evergreen about Elfman while letting his babies bother Freed by flying close to him, but not touching him, therefore not breaking any rules.

"You," Laxus grumbled as he came over to the table, making them all look up at him. "Where do you get off, huh? I leave town for a few days-"

"I'm sorry, Laxus," Freed was quick to apologize. "I shouldn't have done it, but-"

"What?" Frowning, he looked at the other man. "What are you talking about, Freed?"

"Well, whatever it is that you think I have done wrong."

"I'm not upset with you!"

"Oh." Letting out a breath, he said, "Then carry on. Ever was it then?"

"What are you talking about?" The woman glared at her green haired teammate. "I haven't done anything!"

"Bickslow," Laxus said, ignoring thee other two. "Get up. Now."

"Me?" He racked his brain for things he could have done wrong. "What-"

"You broke up with Lisanna."

"Was that today?"

"What?" Laxus growled then. "You're so drunk that you don't even remember?"

"Errr…sure."

"You broke up with Lisanna?" Evergreen glanced around. "Bickslow, get out of here. Elfman's gonna flip. Did she break up with you or did you her?"

"Would Laxus be breathing down his neck if he were not the breaker?" Freed asked, slightly interested too. "And I swear that I just saw the two of you earlier, talking and giggling and-"

"That was before!" Bickslow jumped up then. Now that he knew he was supposed to be upset, he was gonna lay it on thick. "I…I… I hate her!"

"So suddenly?" Evergreen frowned at him. "What changed?'

"Everything changed!"

"Everything," his babies sang along with the man.

"She's not who I thought she was!"

"Thought she was!" was the echo behind his voice.

"Why," Freed complained, "are you yelling?"

"I dunno. It makes me sound more angry than I am, right?"

"Are you…not angry?" Ever asked.

"I-"

"No one cares," Laxus grumbled, reaching out to grab the man by the shoulder. "Because Lisanna? She is upset. And crying. At Mira's house. And it's keeping me from the demon. So you're going to go over there and make up with her."

"No, boss, I-"

"Yeah, Bickslow, you are. So get over it."

"I don't want to."

"Well, just do it. Then, for a week, act like a complete ass and make her break up with you. All fixed."

"No!"

"Bickslow, you're doing it." He just drug him off then, the man's babies following along. "You didn't want to fuck Mira's sister for the rest of your life? You shouldn't have fucked her to begin with."

"I don't wanna do this, boss!"

"And I don't care."

But dragging him was getting annoying. And, once they were off the guildhall grounds, he let the man go.

"Look," Laxus growled as he turned to face him. "I get it, alright? Not everything is meant to be. That's the problem with guild relationships, you know? And I tried to warn you, I tried to tell you not to date my girlfriend's sister. It was a conflict of interest, Bickslow. Two times over!"

"I'm sorry, boss. I just… I got overwhelmed. I'm still overwhelmed. And I can't be with her. We have so many problems. I mean, I'm a night person, she's a morning. I like sausage, she likes bacon. I'm a knight of darkness, she's an angel of light. It just won't work!"

With a sigh, Laxus glanced around before shaking his head. As much as he loved his girlfriend and cared about her sister, the Thunder Legion were still his friends. His best friends.

"I'm not going to make you do something that you don't want to," the lightning mage said finally. Sighing, he turned to walk off. "So go back in there and enjoy yourself. I'll go be killed by Mirajane for not forcing you to come make up with Lisanna. So pour some out for me, huh?"

"W-Wait!" Bickslow moved a lot more coordinated than he usually did drunk, Laxus observed as he came to grab the other man's arm. "You're just gonna give up?"

"Yeah, Bickslow, I am. You're grown. You've done this before. Lisanna's just, you know, all sad that her first boyfriend broke up with her." Then, frowning at the man, Laxus added, "And I'm gonna go get the real story from her right now. If you did something horrible to her, I'mma punch you in the fucking face. So get ready for that."

"Oy, boss," he complained, reaching up then to push his visor up so that they could stare at one another. "I really am in love with Lissy. I just-"

"I get it, alright? Now let me-"

"I just… We have so many problems, you know?" Bickslow was still staring at him, but Laxus was mostly just trying to figure out how he was going to explain to the demon that he couldn't make Bickslow date her sister. Err, well, he probably could, but that it wouldn't be healthy for Lisanna. "And I just wish that there was someone who could, I dunno, fix those problems? Or something? Then maybe would could stay together and-"

"Yeah, well, tough shit. Now-"

"Some sort of…I'm kinda stretching here, 'cause I don't really know the word for it," Bickslow went on. "Uh, like, counseling or... What's the word, boss? You probably know it."

"I don't know, Bickslow," hw grumbled. "Therapy?"

"That's the one, boss!" He even bounced a little.

"That's the one," his babies mimicked, sounded just as thrilled. "Boss!"

"I just think that if we had a more mature, older, more established couple to help us through all this," the seith went on. "Things would work out fine. You know?"

Laxus blinked. "I'mma more established relationship. I mean, I'm in one. And the demon, well, she's not too good at helping, but she really likes it."

"What are you sayin' here, boss? I ain't too smart, you know."

"That you should come back with me," he said. "To Mira's place. And we'll fix you and Lisanna."

"What?" Bickslow made a shocked face. "You? Help me and Lisanna? Unheard of!"

"Well, we'll try. Me and the demon got a pretty damn good track record going."

"Thanks, boss." Bickslow patted him on the back as they started off back towards the house. "This is a real favor, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah." As they were walking along though, Laxus was having his doubts, the same that he usually had when he and Mirajane were about to…counsel people. It wasn't so much that he didn't want Bickslow and Lisanna together. Or that he did. Quite honestly, he didn't care. So…why was he helping out again?

Oh. Right. The demon. Damn her.

When they arrived back at the house, Lisanna seemed to have calmed down some. At the sight of her (ex?) boyfriend though, her eyes sprung tears once more.

"What?" Laxus complained as they came in. Bickslow just scratched at the back of his neck, seemingly uncomfortable. "You told me to bring him here!"

"Don't yell at her, Laxus," Mira scolded as she jumped up from the couch. Then she turned her demonic glare onto Bickslow who tried to grin, but it was a nervous one. "And you-"

"Hey, hey," Bickslow said, backing away with his hands up. Over at the couch, Lisanna dropped her hands from covering her eyes, if only to watch. When Mira looked about ready to hit him, the man let out a yell. "Laxus! Get your woman!"

"I'm not his woman." Mira didn't hit him though. She just reached up to fully push his visor off his head. Bickslow blinked in surprise. She just reached out then to grab his ear and drag him over to the couch. "And how dare you hurt my little sister. After promising me you wouldn't."

"Don't hurt him, Mira," Lisanna pleaded, sounding actually concerned. "Seriously."

"Yeah! I didn't mean to," Bickslow complained as she just drug him over to the couch. "And look! Me and boss have come over here, yeah, so that you and him can help us sort all of this out!"

Mira wasn't playing though. When she let go of his ear, she merely said, "Apologize."

"Mira-"

"Now, Bickslow."

"I'm sorry, Lissy," he was as he took to rubbing at his ears. His dolls hadn't come to his defense though, as upon entering and seeing Lisanna in such a dispiriting state they'd gone to comfort her. At the moment, two of them were in her lap, one was on her head, and the other two had taken up residence on each of her shoulders. "I…Uh..."

"Leave him alone, demon," Laxus grumbled. "Didn't you hear? I brought him to you. Now this is a real test. If you can get the two of them all patched up then, hey, you're really a counselor."

That made her stop and blink. Then, glancing at him, she asked, "It isn't like with doctors?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like how you can't perform on your family," she explained.

"You dealt with Elfman!"

"That was different."

"In what way?"

"It just is, Laxus."

"How-"

"Mira." Lisanna started to cry again as Bickslow went to take a seat over in the chair, far away from the couch. "Help us!"

Sighing loudly, Mirajane said, "Fine. I mean, Lisanna, I'm great at this, as you know-"

"Do we really need a preface?" Laxus groaned.

"-but I have a big conflict of interest. After knowing that he's done  _this_  to you, I'm not too big on helping you get back with this oaf."

"I thought you wanted this?" Mira's boyfriend complained. "You said to go get him so that we could figure this all out."

"That was before."

"Before what?"

"Lisanna went into more detail about how he hurt her and, well, I don't want the two of them should be together."

"What did you tell her?" Laxus asked.

"Yeah." Bickslow was staring at the woman too, rather intensely. "What did you say, Lissy?"

"Don't you dare call her that," Mira hissed, turning to glare at him. "After what you did."

"Okay, okay, Mira." Laxus went to go lay a hand on her arm then. "I'll sit here and mediate, huh? And you go get us some snacks? Some tea? Coffee? Beers? Something to drink. I have a feeling we'll be here awhile."

"If this is what you want, Lisanna," her sister said slowly.

"I do."

As Mirajane walked off, Laxus looked between the other two mages. Lisanna had gone back to hiding her eyes and Bickslow was looking anywhere, but her then.

"Uh, boss?"

"What?" Laxus grumbled.

"Can I get my visor back? Please?"

"No. If the demon doesn't want you to wear it, you can't wear it."

Peeking through her fingers, Lisanna glanced at Bickslow before saying, "I can't believe that you showed up here. How dare you?"

Bickslow glanced at Laxus, but the guy had gone to peek into the kitchen and wasn't paying attention. Using that to his advantage, he mouthed,  _'Seriously?'_

Before she could say anything though, Mira was coming back.

"Okay, Lisanna, here's a water, Laxus, your beer, and Bickslow, you can go drink from a sewage pipe for all I care."

They all were taken aback by that. That was almost dirty coming from Mira's mouth.

"Demon," Laxus grumbled as he took his beer and she continued on into the room with a plate of crackers and cheeses. "Calm down."

"No, Laxus. He's a jerk and I…I… I don't like you anymore, Bickslow!"

The seith took to scratching at his Mohawk. "Uh…I'm sorry?"

"You should be! I trusted you!"

"Mira," Lisanna complained from the couch. "I'm the one that's hurt here. Not you."

"I'm hurt too."

Rolling his eyes, Laxus said, "Well, let's just all take a seat, alright? And get started?"

Mira narrowed her eyes at Bickslow again before going to sit down next to her younger sister. Tossing an arm over her shoulders, she said, "Fine. What, Bickslow, is your problem with my sister?"

"That's a real way of puttin' things," he said slowly. "I mean, I thought that therapy-"

"I asked you a question."

"Well…uh…I…"

"Bickslow said that I'm bad in bed."

"What?"

That came from all three of them. Bickslow made a face at her too, but she just shrugged at him.

He was the one that was drowning.

"I can't do this," Laxus gagged. "I mean… What are we supposed to do with that? I… Ew. No. Gross. I'm gonna barf. Never mind. We can't help. I'd help the damn Salamander again before I talk about… Next topic. Please. Someone. I-"

"Lisanna likes to sing in the shower and it really bothers me."

"I can work with that," Mira said slowly, still recovering from Lisanna's little revelation. "Though I'd like to think that we were here over more serious-"

"She also constantly flirts with Natsu which is really annoying and-"

"I do not!" Lisanna's voice hit a new octave then as she dropped her hands and glared the seith down. She wasn't even crying anymore. In fact, she looked more angry about that than she had been over being broken up with. Laxus just sighed, popping the tab of his beer before taking to walking around the room. "Why would you say that?"

"Because you do, Lissy. You-"

"No!"

"And you also flirt with, like, nearly all my friends outside of the guild."

"Being interested in what someone has to say isn't flirting!"

"The way you do it? Yeah, it is. Actin' all innocent and shit. And laughing at their stupid jokes and touchin' on 'em and-"

"Name me one guy-"

"Okay, guys, you're just arguing here," Laxus grumbled. "Mira, counsel them."

"W-Well," she said slowly, glancing at her younger sister and then back at Bickslow. "Lisanna, you really shouldn't-"

"I don't."

"She does too." Bickslow was getting into it then. "That's not even bringing up the fact that she keeps trying to make me clean my apartment when I don't-"

"It's disgusting, Bickslow, the way that you live. You-"

"And? You don't live with me, kid. I live alone. So-"

"If you want me to keep coming over-"

"Clearly," Laxus butted in, "he doesn't. Else we wouldn't be here."

"Laxus, shush." Mira was staring at Bickslow then. "So what? You're mad that she wants you to not live like a pig?"

"Mad is a harsh word," he grumbled. "I just don't like being treated like a kid. When I'm clearly not."

"Neither am I!" Lisanna, apparently, wasn't much up for using inside voices that day. "But you always act like I am. You always-"

"I always what, Lisanna? Huh? Protect you? Treat you good? Buy you things?"

"You, like, try to control my whole life."

"I do not."

"You do too. You want to know when I'm out on a job, if I'm hanging out with Natsu and Happy, if Lucy's gonna be there-"

"I'm so sorry that I don't like you hanging out constantly with the guy that you've openly admitted, oh, over a thousand times you're in love with-"

"Right, Bickslow. Because you never loved someone when you were a kid and then had to move on."

"You didn't move on! He was just never interested in the first place and you had to come to accept that." Crossing his arms then, he glared up at the ceiling. "I just don't like being second best."

"I have never called you-"

"You don't have to. It's obvious. You would rather hangout with him than me and you know it."

"Hangout with? Yeah, sometimes."

"See?"

"But you'd rather be with Freed and Ever than me sometimes too," she said. "Right?"

"That's not the point."

"That is the point!"

"Stop yelling," Mira told her sister. "And Bickslow, it's not fair for you to try and keep her from being friends with someone."

"I'm not doing that," he said. "I just think that it's really disrespectful to me for her to hangout with someone I don't want her to. Especially alone."

"Natsu's, like, devoted to Lucy, so-"

"Yeah, Lissy, and it'd be nice to have that same devotion from you."

"Why would she?" They were giving Laxus a headache and he was quickly becoming over them being together. "If you're breaking up with her? I mean, even if you guys work out, why would she ever be fully committed to you again? If you're going to pull shit like this? Which brings me to my next point; I made a horrible mistake. This clearly isn't working-"

"Behave."

"Mira-"

"Either behave or get out."

"Is the second really an option or-"

"Laxus."

"I just don't see what the big deal is," Bickslow grumbled, still glaring up above him. "I just asked you to run it by me a day in advance before you hangout alone with that guy. That's all."

"Wait, you did that?" Mira glanced at her sister. "Tell me that you didn't agree to that."

"No," she said with a frown. "I didn't."

"What good would that do you anyways?" Laxus asked his bodyguard.

"It'd give me time to clear my schedule and follow them."

"…I join Laxus' team," Mira said then. "I don't want this to work out. Sorry, Lisanna. I'll get you a better guy. A hotter guy. I have so many friends from modeling and guys I know from other guilds and… You know who is a lot like Natsu? Sting. Sting's a real good-"

"No, Mira!" Lisanna went back to holding her hands over her eyes. "I don't want someone else. I want Bickslow."

He was frowning then too, his tongue not even peeking its way out. "I was told by that little cat that you fixed people, Mirajane. That you had a perfect record. So are you not gonna fix us or what?"

Perfect record…sister being with douche…being able to brag about perfect record…

Mira took so long thinking that Lisanna spoke again.

"I just don't think that it's fair, Bickslow," she said, glaring over at him. "I mean, what then? Because I'm friends with a guy that when I was a kid I liked, we're going to break up?"

"No. It's… We still haven't covered the singing in the shower thing. And the bacon stuff. I was tellin' that to boss before."

"Bicks-"

"I'm just not no good for you, Lissy. I'm sorry. I… I'm, like, dark and brooding and-"

"Is this what others think about you? Or just your fantasy of what you are? Because, trust me, no one takes you seriously anyhow," Laxus grumbled.

"-you're just so bubbly and light and… It was fun. But I… I'm not the hero that you think I am. When I was a kid, I used to catch frogs and try and squish them between my hands until they died."

That one caught everyone off guard. Enough so that none of them spoke. Bickslow just went on with a sigh.

"And I, like, really get off on bondage, but I haven't told that to you yet because I didn't think that you'd be into-"

"What," the other man growled then, "did we say about bedroom talk?"

"I mean," he kept it up. "You, like, freaked that one time-"

"You can't just tie someone up in their sleep. That's not-"

"Oh dear." Mirajane put a hand to her cheek, glancing at her sister. "Why haven't we talked about this before?"

Lisanna was blushing though and wouldn't look back at her. "It was just a one time thing and he-"

"I'm a good guy, yeah," Bickslow was saying then, mostly ignoring the rest of them for some reason. Even his babies were too shocked for words, it seemed. Or were taking Lisanna's side in everything as they were still seated with her and didn't make a peep. "But with a tainted past. Did I ever tell you about that time that I-"

"If this is another story about sex or a damn frog, keep it to yourself." Laxus was done with his beer and also done with them. "Look, Lisanna, recent revelations have made it clear that this isn't going to work it out. Sorry, Mirajane. No more perfect record. I shouldn't have brought him here. Now-"

"I just… I don't wanna break up, Lisanna. I really don't. But…I don't want to stay with you and make you hate me either." He finally looked down from the ceiling to stare over at her. "You've become, like, the best friend I've ever had. I like hanging out with you. Point blank. I've never liked that about any other girl I've slept with. But me and you can just sit around and talk or smoke or train or do anything together and it's fun. And I want to keep that. So-"

"But don't you get by doing this that you two can't keep doing that?" Mira's dramatic side was winning out over her desire to keep her sister far from the seith. "I mean, if you break up, how do you think that you two could possibly-"

"I dunno. I was hopin' that we could be mature about this."

"Right. So basically," Lisanna hissed at him then. "You could still get to hang out with me, but I'd have to watch you hook up with all these random women and stuff."

"Well…I guess. That sounds good. Yeah. Let's-"

"I love you."

"Lissy-"

"That's not fair."

"I love you too! Did you miss that part? About how I'm a man of darkness and you're light and-"

"You've really built yourself up into a character, haven't you?" Laxus remarked. "I mean, I really don't think-"

"I don't care about that," Lisanna told him. "I… I just like being with you. Even if you do kill frogs."

"Used to."

"Bicks, I saw you the other day when we were out fishing with Natsu and Lucy. You-"

"I caught a frog to prove to Natsu that I could. That's all. Nothing more."

"Bicks."

"It's true! I let him go right after."

"Really?"

He just glared. "This isn't about the frogs."

"I really don't think this is about anything," Laxus kept up. "I mean, does anyone else see how dumb this all is or- Nope. Taking in you guys' looks, I'm going to go out on a limb and say I'm flying solo here."

"I think that the two of you should list what you like about one another," Mira offered up then, slowly. "That seems to be what's wrong here. Right? You're so caught up, Bickslow, in what's wrong with Lisanna and you that you forgot what's right. I mean, just the other day I saw you guys up at the bar, playing billiards and laughing and…and… I didn't think then and I don't think now that you want to hurt her."

"I don't."

"Well, this is hurting her. And why? Because you killed a few frogs in the past? And sometimes like…" Mira glanced around before whispering something about naughty things before continuing on. "I mean, Lisanna, before all of this, did you feel like he was a…bad guy?"

"Knight of darkness," Bickslow corrected.

"No," she complained, glaring over at him. "I didn't. I think you're cute."

"I'm not cute, Lisanna. I'm dangerous."

"You're very cute. And what have you done recently anyways, Bickslow, that would qualify you as-"

"I have dark thoughts, okay?"

"Bickslow-"

"I am, Lisanna. Say it. I'm a good guy with a dark past and-"

"Fine! Alright. Whatever. You're…cute, but bad. Happy?"

"Dark past."

"What have you done that's so bad? Try and take over the guild? Once? Acted like a douche to the rest of us at times? Killed a few frogs?" Lisanna was staring at him. "Who cares?"

"The frogs care."

"Behave," Mira told her boyfriend who just frowned.

"I like you, Bickslow," she told him then. "And all your weird stuff. I like playing with the babies or listening to your stories or just sitting around with one another, doing nothing. You're my favorite person in the whole world, Bickslow. You really think that that you can just end something like that?"

"I… It's a lot of pressure. Being so important to someone. And I-"

"Is that what this is really about?" Mira asked. "Are you feeling overwhelmed, Bickslow? Is that it?"

"I dunno," he mumbled, that time looking at the ground. "I sorta… You are always tellin' people about how you look up to me, Lissy."

"You do?" Laxus frowned. "I mean, Lisanna, sleeping with him is bad enough, but having him as your role model?"

"That's not what I mean when I say that," she complained, making a face at her sister's boyfriend then. "I just, I dunno, I…admire you, Bickslow. You've gone through a lot, but you're, like, the happiest person I know. Always. And even when something goes wrong, you're able to just laugh it off."

"I admire you too, kid," he said with a nod. "I mean, you got a way more interesting back story than me anyhow. That's how come no one even cares about mine."

"I dunno," Mira whispered. "This amphibious massacre is going to stay with me for awhile."

"I care," Lisanna told him. "A lot."

"I care about you too."

"And… If I'm too much pressure for you, then I'll stop talking about it so much."

"No, no." He shook his head. "I really like the attention I get from it. My ego don't get stroked that often, you know? Other than the babies, you're all I got. Really. In, like, everything."

"That's not true. You have Ever and Freed and…I mean, Laxus is there too, but-"

"Watch it, brat," the man grumbled.

"That's not true though, Lissy," he complained. "You're the one with so many great friends. And everyone loves you."

"They do not."

"They do too! They-"

"They feel sorry for me, Bickslow."

"Lisanna," her sister whispered, but she just shook her head.

"It's true. They do. And that's not the same as caring about someone. You're closer to Freed and Evergreen that I'll ever be to someone again. They're your team. And yeah, maybe at one point I was that close to Natsu and Happy, but not anymore. And probably never again. That part of my life is just…over."

She thought that he'd hit her below the belt about Natsu again then, but instead he just lifted his eyes to stare at her.

"I… I could be that close to you," he said slowly.

"No, you can't," she said with a shake of her head. "Not if you're feeling overwhelmed now as it is. I mean-"

"I just… Sometimes I get freaked out, okay? I mean…I love you, kid. And I ain't ever loved someone else like this. I ain't ever been loved either. Usually women think that I'm just stupid or just a replacement for Laxus."

"Replacement for… I knew it, Laxus." Mira frowned over at him. "All those women he used to date, they were your old girlfriends. Weren't they?"

"Demon, we can counsel ourselves later, alright?"

"Laxus-"

"What difference does stuff from over a year ago make?"

"All the difference."

"But you, kid," Bickslow was going on. "You think of me as, like, an adult. And are impressed that I can take us out to get cheap food. You don't expect me to, like, wow you. You just like being around me. And you even chip in for dinner sometimes, which-"

"Less focus on food there, buddy," Laxus mumbled to him as Mira still just glared at him. "More talk about how she makes you a better person."

"You do!" He nodded his head then. "Really, Lissy. You make me so much better. I… Yeah, I hate it when you make me clean my apartment, but it's not  _that_  bad. And when you sing in the shower, sometimes it's cute."

"I don't do it that often."

"Lissy, I can hear you."

"I don't-"

"Fine. You don't. Whatever." Shaking his head, he said, "I just meant that… Even if feel like you're taking over my life sometimes or that I can't handle it, most of the time I just gotta take a step back and look at all you've done for me. I have so much more fun than when I'm by myself. And… I overreacted. I freaked. And I said something I shouldn't. And I take it back. I don't wanna break up."

"Neither do I," she whispered. "At all."

Laxus frowned then. Had they…done it? He felt like he hadn't done anything! Then again, he hadn't. And neither had Mirajane. Huh. Maybe he should think about getting out of the mage business. Apparently, therapists do absolutely nothing. And get paid for it.

Hey… How come he hadn't been charging idiots for his time?

Just as he was about to ask Mira this, Bickslow and Lisanna jumped up and went to hug. Mira was clapping too, as if twenty minutes ago, she hadn't been against the relationship. Laxus thought about bringing up the bondage stuff, just to freak her out and ruin her happy moment, but…well… Mira did have a pretty smile.

"I did it again," she whispered to him as he came over to hug her. Bickslow's babies were cheering and he was hugging Lisanna real tight and, well, if that wasn't a job well done, Laxus didn't know what was. "Perfect score."

"That's 'cause you are perfect, demon," Laxus said as he smiled, if only slightly, just for her. "You know that, right?"

"Yeah," she giggled. "I do."

And eventually Laxus got Mira to go out to dinner with her though that was only after making sure that Lisanna and Bickslow were fine. They both said that they were. And when they got back from dinner, Mira and Laxus found no sign of them. Elfman was home though, snoring, so they just headed off to Mira's room silently, not even wanting to deal with him that day.

It was probably about midnight when Lisanna and Bickslow showed back up at the house. They'd originally planned to go back to his place, but he didn't have ice cream over there and Lisanna knew for a fact they had a whole carton of it back at the freezer at home.

It wasn't a hard choice.

"Mmmm," Lisanna giggled as she sat up on the counter, the carton next to her as Bickslow went to get them bowls. They'd already dropped his dormant babies off in the bedroom and were alone in the darkness "That was pretty damn fun, you know?"

"Lissy," he complained. "Such a filthy mouth."

"You did catch me off guard though," she said slowly then, glancing at him as he came over with the bowls. He just sat them down next to her though before moving to stand in front of her. "With that Natsu stuff."

"Yeah," he sighed as he held up his hands, waiting for her to interlace their fingers. "Shit got real for a bit, huh?"

"Mmmhmm."

"But… You know I'd never really break up with you. That was just for fun, you know?"

"You know I'd do anything for you," she agreed. "Though I really thought that Mira was gonna hurt you at one point."

"You know how much I love you that I didn't punch her when she pulled my visor off," he grumbled though, at the moment, he wasn't wearing it and they could stare at one another. Lisanna smiled slightly.

"You couldn't break character."

"Of course not. And if I had done somethin' to her, it would have ruined everything. Boss would have flipped." Then, snickering, he said, "He came up to the bar and was yelling and stuff and I had no idea what he was talking about. I forgot that today was the day."

"How could you forget? We had it all planned out."

"You know I'm forgetful."

"We talked about it before I left the bar to go whine to Mirajane," Lisanna complained. "I mean, Bicks-"

"It sucked too," he went on. "Watching you cry."

"It was all fake, you know."

"I know. But still. You had me feelin' like a douche."

"Well."

"Well."

"Well."

Both of them about jumped out of their skin at the sound of a third voice. Then, shocking them further, a light was turned on in the kitchen and there was a very ticked off Laxus standing in the doorway.

"B-Boss, I-"

"Hey, Laxus. Did you-"

"So," he growled as he came further into the room. "You two idiots played me, huh? Is that it? What? You think-"

"Keep your voice down," Lisanna hissed as Bickslow turned to face him. "You'll wake Mirajane and-"

"I don't care! Where do you idiots get off-"

"Oy, boss," Bickslow said, shaking his head "It wasn't like that. We just… Everyone else was havin' so much fun bein' fixed and all and… I just wanted to spend some time with you too. And Lissy likes actin' stuff out."

"I do," she agreed.

"And you were talkin' the other day about how much Mira likes this stuff and I know that you like makin' her happy, so I just-"

"I don't," Laxus grumbled, coming closer, "like being lied to."

"Laxus, if we told you it was a game, you wouldn't have gone for it," Lisanna pointed out. "And we wanted our turn. I mean, even Happy got to play therapist with you guys, but we couldn't? That's not fair."

"It's not," Bickslow said.

"It's not a game! It's-"

"It is a game. And me and Lissy really enjoyed it."

"We did."

"And we'd like to play other stuff with you and Mirajane."

"Well, within reason."

Bickslow snickered. "Gross, Lissy."

"What?"

"You was implying that I meant-"

"Ew! No I wasn't! Mira's my sister, freak."

"You're the one that said it."

"I did not!"

Laxus had to take a few deep breaths then to stop himself from murdering the two of them. They were so…annoying, to say the least. But also…

Huh. He just realized that the demon had been rather…willing that night. And if he had come home from a job, sure she would have been too, but not so much out of gratitude. She was really happy that he'd helped her fix her sister and Bickslow. And even though he knew then that they hadn't, it didn't mean that he hadn't felt any less rewarded earlier.

"Look," he growled at them then, giving both a point. "You two don't try and trick me again, got it?"

"Aye, boss."

"Sure, whatever."

"And your sister doesn't hear about how this was all fake."

"Sure thing, boss."

"Duh, Laxus."

Then, frowning at both of them, he said, "And I want half this ice cream."

"What?" Lisanna jumped off the counter. "No way! I-"

"Fair is fair, Lissy," Bickslow said, rushing to get the boss his share. After all, he had just been caught lying to the man. "So, uh, just sit there quietly for a moment, huh?"

"And," Laxus went on as he eyed them. "No more talk about… I don't want to think about you guys…"

"Like we really want you thinking about it to begin with," Lisanna complained.

"You brought it up! It was literally the first transgression you mentioned."

"Yeah, Lissy," Bickslow said with a frown. "What was up with that? I ain't ever said that you were bad at nothing."

"I just thought that's what people do in couples therapy," she said with a shrug. "And I wanted an authentic experience. I mean, what did you talk about with Natsu and Lucy then?"

"Definitely not that," Laxus grumbled, taking his bowl of ice cream when Bickslow handed it to him before walking off. He'd come for a sandwich, but, well, ice cream would do. "And don't wake me up again. With your voices and your talking. Just be quiet, alright? I am trying to sleep off the worst conversation I've ever had with you ever, Bickslow."

"Oy, boss. Not all of it was fun for me either."

Lisanna just glanced at her boyfriend. "So, about this frog thing-"

"It was part of the ruse, Lissy."

"Sure it was."

"It was!"

When Laxus got back to his girlfriend, he found that she was still sleeping and it was just as well. He was still a little peeved at Lisanna and Bickslow, but, in the end, they'd only done what he'd been doing to the demon the past couple of times. And it had made her happy.

So what was the harm in that?

 


	6. Chapter 6

  


Laxus resolved not to tell Mirajane about how the whole Lisanna/Bickslow thing was a sham. He chalked it up to the same as when he got Carla to phone it in. Just something to keep the demon happy. And it had worked. So there was no reason to be that upset about it.

There wasn't so long of a wait till their next case popped up. And by far, it was the oddest.

It started with Laxus sitting up at the bar, talking to Mirajane like usual. Kinana and Lisanna were both working that day, so she wasn't in as high of demand as usual and spent most of the morning standing n front of her boyfriend, pouring him endless beers and gabbing nonstop.

Not about counseling though, so Laxus was putting up with it. In fact, part of the time, she was bragging on him. Even better. She liked to do that some times and, well, Laxus sure liked hearing her do it.

"-perfect amount of muscles," Mira went on as she refilled his beer. "I mean, some guys go super big and that's not really attractive, you know? I mean, you're not lanky or anything, but you're not massive either."

Grunt.

But she was right.

"What is it that you always say? Laxus?"

Grunt.

"Say it, Laxus. Say-"

"I have the body of a god."

That made Mirajane giggle some. "That's it."

"It's true," he insisted. "I have the body of a blond haired god. Tell me that I don't."

"You do, dragon."

"I'm the Thunder God." He even held up an arm, flexing some. "You see that? I make women weak. You feel that clinch in your stomach, Moira? Does it-"

"What did you just call me?"

"Moira." He frowned. "Mo…Mo…Me…Ma…"

"How drunk are you?"

"Berry." More frowns. "Very. Very drunk."

"You're so cute, dragon," she giggled, reaching out to grab his chin in her hand and squeeze it. "I love you. You know that?"

Grunt. Then he pulled away from her. "Leave me alone…Mira." Ha.

She moved to pat him on the head then. "My little god. So cute."

"Stop it."

"I'm the only demon to have their very own tamed god."

"I'm going to kill you."

"Behave, dragon."

A loud throat clearing made them both glance up, fearful that it was Master Makarov, come to tell Mirajane to get back to work. But it wasn't. Instead, standing there on the bar, was one of the cats. The black one. Laxus narrowed his eyes at him, but Mirajane just smiled at him.

"Hi, Lily," she greeted as the cat held his hands up the air, almost poised to bring his ear folds down, just in case. He was dealing with Laxus, after all. "Did you need something?'

"No," he said, slowly glancing back and forth between the two of them. "Nothing."

"Oh. Well-"

"I was just… I have heard many stories as of late," the Exceed said as Laxus went back to his beer. "About all of the relationships you have healed. You are quite the…therapist, Mirajane."

"Aw, thanks, Lily." She was shifting her focus onto him then. Good. Laxus was done with her for the time being anyhow. "You know, it hasn't been easy, but I think I've done a pretty good job."

"You've done an excellent job. From what I hear, I mean."

She nodded. "I do have a lot of satisfied-"

"What, cat," Laxus grumbled, "do you want?"

"W-Well…" Lily coughed then and looked off. "I was wondering if you could… I mean…"

"Tell me that you don't want that damn white cat too," Laxus groaned. "Really, hooking up cats ain't exactly our specialty."

"Of course that's not it!" Lily seemed to yell at the Thunder God then, who raised an eyebrow. Pantherlily just reached up to grab his ears, preparing for the worst.

"Laxus, leave him alone."

"What?"

"I mean it. Behave."

"I'm not doing-"

"What do you need, Lily?" Mira wasn't up for arguing with her boyfriend, apparently.

"I just…well… You did a great job of course, Mira, putting together Gajeel and Levy."

"Yeah, I know, they-"

"But…well… It has been nearly a month now and… It has been hard on me, you must understand," he said slowly. "I…"

"Spit it out, cat," Laxus growled.

"I wish for you to help me and Gajeel's relationship!"

That shocked even Lily who, dropping his hands, moved to cough into his fist.

"Well, this is even weirder than originally imagined."

"Shush, Laxus." Mira was leaning down then, so that she and Lily could stare one another in the eyes. "What do you mean?"

"It is only… Gajeel and Levy have always spent time together," he said, glancing around, as if fearful of being overheard. As he was speaking to Mirajane. Who was the queen of gossip. Seriously. Laxus was starting to wonder if all Exceeds were born with brain disorders. The males at least. "But now it is nearly unbearable! And do not get me wrong, I very much so enjoy Levy myself, but this is just unreasonable at this point. And I have tried to put up with it-"

"Ooh." Mira clapped her hands. "I've never counseled two guys before. This will be so much fun!"

"Keep your voice down," Lily complained. "And Gajeel must not know-"

"I'm very discreet," Mira told him with a wink. "I know. We could all go out to dinner-"

"Demon," Laxus groaned. "We've done that so many times that even Natsu would be able to figure out what we were doing. In fact, I think he did. Like, on the first try. So-"

"Fine," she complained, standing straight once more. She could see Lisanna sneaking out of the bar about then with Bickslow, which, usually, she'd have shut down immediately, but she still thought that she'd just fixed them and all their many problems, so she was more than happy to give them some time together. Besides, she did need to work at least a little that day. "Laxus, you and Gajeel are going to go out training together."

"We're what?"

"And Lily," she went on. "Just make sure you stay behind when they go."

"I do not-"

"Demon-"

"Just make it happen," she told them. Then, with a giggle and bounce, she added, "And I'll take care of the rest!"

"Why," Laxus groaned moving to lay his head down on the bar, "am I not convinced?"

Lily just formed his wings before flying off. Putting his trust in his sworn enemy (or more like the god of his sworn enemy) was not reassuring to him either, but something had to be done. And apparently, that was it.

Oh, Gajeel would kill him if he found out. Lily just knew it. But it wasn't right the way that he and Levy were just excluding him from things. He wasn't allowed to even go out with them most of the time. He felt like Jet and Droy. Just less grovely.

Sigh. Maybe things would all turn out. Maybe.

* * *

"Hey, nut muncher."

Gajeel glared, turning quickly on the street to turn to face his addresser. "The hell did you just call-"

It was Laxus, of course, who'd managed to track the other man down about a day later. Gajeel was, in fact, heading down to the guildhall to look for Lily, who'd been missing the night before when he got home, but that could wait. He, apparently, had to kill a certain Thunder Fraud at the moment.

"You heard me." The blond haired man came to stand in front of him, glaring at the other slayer before glancing down at the woman with him. She just grinned though.

"Hi, Laxus," Levy greeted as Gajeel, realizing that his hand very much so was still being held by hers, moved to shake it free. "Did you need something?"

"Actually, yeah," he said, eyeing the other slayer once more. "A partner."

"Yeah, well, I'm taken. Hit someone else up."

Laxus, still determined to keep his usual void face, just narrowed his eyes before saying, "I need another Dragon Slayer. You know, for training."

"Find someone else. I-"

"There ain't nobody else," Laxus grumbled in response. "Other than Wendy, which isn't happening and the Salamander, who-"

"Natsu always wants to train with you though," Levy said, trying to be helpful. "He-"

"Look." Laxus glared at the other man then. "I helped you out, didn't I? You got that little concert, did you not, while I was out on my job?"

"Yeah, and I already returned that favor to you," Gajeel replied. "I went out on that stupid date with you and your girlfriend. So-"

"And I'm saying," Laxus grumbled as he took a step closer, facing darkening some, "that you haven't."

"And I'm saying," Gajeel said, not backing down for a moment, "that I have. So-"

"Hey, knock it off, guys." Levy frowned at both of them. "Seriously, Gajeel, if Laxus just wants to train, why not? You were going to today anyways."

"With Lily and you," he told her, not breaking his glaring match with Laxus for even a second. "If I could ever find the damn cat. He's never around!"

Laxus snorted. "Yeah, well, I am. And unless you're scared-"

"I ain't scared of shit."

"Gajeel-" Levy tried, but Laxus spoke right over her.

"Then prove it," The man held his head higher. "You come train with me for the day. Serious training."

"Fine," Gajeel growled. "Levy, I'mma be busy today."

She didn't like that. "I'm going too."

That made them break their match as they both turned to look at her.

"No way," Laxus said.

"Why would you?" her boyfriend asked.

"I'm not going to just let him take you off to kill you or whatever," she hissed at him.

"What are you trying to say? That I couldn't take him?"

"Gajeel."

Laxus though was a little in shock. So it wasn't just him and Mira, huh? A first name could really get a guy back under control? Huh. He was starting to feel a tad less special…

"Fine," the other slayer gave in. Rather easily, Laxus would add. Then again, even before they were dating the man seemed to have a weak spot for her. "You can come. But don't get in the way!"

Laxus wasn't going to stand for that. Mainly because he knew Mirajane wouldn't. Maybe he had his own weak spot…

"No," he grumbled, shaking his head. "You can't come, Levy. You-"

"And why the hell not?" Gajeel was right back to glaring at him. "The shrimp can go wherever she wants!"

But…Laxus wasn't sure of Mira's plan (honestly, he never understood anything she did, even when she took the time out to explain it all to him), but he still knew for a fact that there was no way that Levy being there factored into it. At all.

"Don't you have something else to do?" Laxus complained. "Or-"

"What," the other slayer growled, "do you want to do to me that she can't be there for?"

Because that couldn't have been phrased a better way. Still trying hard not to just fry them both and be done with it (it'd be impossible to explain to the demon), he turned to walk off.

"Fine! Come on!. Both of you then. I don't have all day."

So that part of the plan was done…sorta. Laxus just hoped that the demon came through because there was no way that he could put up with Black Steel and Levy for very long. No freaking way.

At the moment, in fact, Mirajane was busy checking in with her most favorite couple of all (right behind her and Laxus, of course, but that went without stating), Natsu and Lucy, who were in the guildhall early that day, looking at jobs with Happy.

"You're not taking Gray or Erza?" she asked as they perused the requests, Happy floating around their heads.

"Nope," Natsu said as he mostly just let Lucy decide for once. "Gray, that squinty eyed bastard, he's been trying to take all the glory out on jobs recently. He just makes me so-"

"Calm down," Lucy sighed, hardly glancing at him. "I mean, he's not even here."

"You know who else isn't here?" Happy asked, dropping to the ground then as he stared happily up at Mirajane. "Car-"

"Thank you, Mira, so much, for this," Lucy complained as she too glanced back at the woman. She was standing behind then after all, but was looking down at Happy herself, who had that lovesick look, bouncing around just from the thought of the other Exceed. "We've gone years without this level of weirdness from him, but you've brought it all back to the surface."

"It's not weird," Natsu said. "He's just in  _love_."

"Yep!" Happy wasn't even mad that he was using that against him. "I always have been, but thanks to you, Mirajane, my fire has been rekindled."

"Yean, Mira." Lucy didn't sound near as thrilled. "Thanks."

Happy looked ready to burst at the seams. "With our first date down, I'm think we're on track for the second to place, oh, anytime between now and the next five years!"

"You're real ambitious, little buddy," Natsu congratulated.

"Do you even know what that word means?" Lucy asked.

"Not a clue."

Mira was content with staying over there with them forever, what with her one track mind and all, but Lily coming over put a stop to that.

"Mira," he greeted as he stood next to Happy, staring up at her as well. "We have an engagement to attend to. Have you forgotten?"

"An- Oh. Yes. I-"

"Me and Carla are going to be engaged," Happy told them all. "Eventually."

Ignoring that, Lucy removed one of the posters from the board before turning to Mira. "We want this—Where are you going?"

"Me and Lily have something to do," she called over her shoulder as the two left the guildhall. "Kinana will take care of requests today."

"Wonder what they're doing together," Lucy muttered with a frown.

"I dunno," Natsu said, reaching over to take the request so he could read it over himself. "Say, Hap, think that she's setting him up with Carla too?"

"What?" That made the cat's glazed over eyes go back to normal. "Mirajane wouldn't do that! We have an understanding! And Lily wouldn't… Not all Exceeds like each other, you know, Natsu!"

"Yeah, Natsu." Lucy snatched back the request. "So rude."

"Very rude," Happy agreed.

"What'd I say?" Groaning, Natsu headed after them as they went to find Kinana. "I never get anything right."

Mira and Lily were long gone by that point though, heading to the predetermined destination that she'd confirmed with Laxus. It was supposed to be really casual. Completely unplanned. Mira was the master of things like that. The undisputed champ. She had it all figured out.

Just in case anyone forgot, she did have a perfect record going.

"See, Lily?" she said loudly when they stumbled upon them deep in the forest. "I told you I could lead you right to him."

At the moment, Laxus and Gajeel were in what looked like a heated argument. From what Mira could pick up, one had hit the other one without reason or something. Levy was just watching them, too nervous and unsure exactly of how to settle them down. At the sight of the other woman though, she seemed even more shocked.

"Demon," Laxus growled as he glanced over at her. Once again, he'd been given a script. "What are you doing here?"

"Lily," she said, gesturing to the cat who was standing next to her, looking unimpressed, "came to me and asked me to find the two of you. Well, you, Gajeel, of course. And since you're both together, it was easy. I mean, you know that I practically have a tracker on you, Laxus. That's what I told him. I could find you anywhere. Even without your nifty little dragon senses."

"Yeah," he grumbled as he relaxed some, rolling his shoulders. "I-"

"Well, what did you want, cat?" Gajeel turned from Laxus to look at them then, over where they were standing on the other side of the clearing. "Huh? And how did you know that I was with Laxus?"

"What?"

"You heard me. How did the two of you know that I was with Laxus, huh? That you knew to…track him, Mirajane? I mean-"

"Obviously, Gajeel," Levy spoke up which Laxus and Mirajane, who were exchanging worried glances, were thankful for, "Laxus told Mira beforehand that he was going to take you out training. I'm sure that you guys tell one another everything, right, guys?"

Grunt.

"Absolutely."

Lily cleared his throat before saying, "Levy, I am surprised to find you here." Mainly because it wasn't part of the plan, but in fact, extremely detrimental to it. "What, exactly, are you doing? Surely you are not training with the two of them…are you?"

"No," she told him. "Mediating, more than anything."

"Oh, wow," Mirajane said. "That's basically what I do, you know, when I counsel people. I've found-"

"What," Laxus grumbled, wanting to move the script along, "did you two need, demon?"

"Oh." More giggles. "Lily was concerned, Gajeel, as to where you were. He said that you two-"

"Not concerned," Pantherlily was quick to interject. That certain was not a word that he nor Gajeel would use in a general sense. "Just…confused. I thought that we were training today and was asking of your whereabouts."

"And you went to her?" Gajeel asked. Lily only shrugged.

"I thought perhaps you'd taken a job."

"Without you?"

"You seem to be doing many things without me these past few weeks."

Now Gajeel was completely done with Laxus. Growling slightly, he turned to face the Exceed. "What's that supposed to mean, cat?"

"It means whatever you think it means."

"What?" Advancing on them then, Gajeel said, "You're not making any sense. When have I gone on a job without asking if you wanted to come with me?"

"I am not saying that you have."

"Then what are you saying? Huh?"

"Gajeel," Mirajane interjected as Laxus resisted the urge to quietly sneak away and pretend like he had nothing to do with anything. "Don't you think that maybe you should speak with a softer, more clear tone? And-"

"Wait," Levy said slowly, looking to the other woman with a grin. "Are you trying to…counsel them? Right now?"

"What?" Gajeel glanced back at her before at Mira. "Why would you be doing that?" And, with a glare to Laxus, he said, "This isn't part of any deal!"

"Deal?" Mira repeated. "What-"

"Hey, now, guys," Laxus said, coughing some. "Let's, uh, calm down some here, huh? Clearly there are some things to be worked out and Mira's being kind enough to take a crack at them."

"Things to be worked out?' Gajeel wasn't having any of it, apparently. "Lily, tell me what they're going on about. Right now."

"Nothing," he said, though he was glaring at Mirajane. He had been insistent that if they did this, there was no way that Gajeel could know about it. He'd practically demanded it! "I don't-"

"Did anyone else see that?" Laxus interrupted, glaring over a tree line across the clearing. "I swear, I just saw, like, someone run by or something."

"I think," Mira said, speaking right over him. Which was fine, as no one was really paying attention anyhow. "Lily is just a tad…lonely, Gajeel."

"Lonely?" The Iron Dragon Slayer crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. "What exactly is going on here now? How are you lonely?"

"I'm not! Mira-" Lily tried, but Laxus wasn't having it.

"Seriously, I smell someone," the other slayer said, still glancing around. "Like, someone familiar, but-"

"Laxus, please," his girlfriend complained. "We're working here."

"Working? You're not working!" Gajeel had been okay the first time because he was getting a concert out of it, but at that point, it was just ridiculous. He liked Mirajane as much as you could like an acquaintance/distant friend, but pretending to have problems just to build up her ego was not something that he supported. "There's nothing to work on! You-"

"Lily," Levy asked as she came over too. "Is something wrong?"

"Nothing. I-"

"Lily thinks that-"

"Mira, please," the Exceed said, looking off and away from all of them. "There is nothing wrong and I-"

"Why would you be lonely?" Gajeel wasn't letting that one go. "Cat? I mean, we spend practically ever day together!"

"I'm not lonely. At all."

"He's jealous, alright?" Laxus was going rogue then. They had to get off the silly topic of the damn cat and his insecurities and onto the fact that Laxus was nearly certain there was someone _stalking them_. He thought that they should be the most important thing to everyone, but apparently not. "You're not spending enough time with him anymore, Gajeel, since you and Levy started…whatever it is that you're doing together. If I've learned anything from the Salamander, the cats are like kids. Just pay attention to them, feed them, and everything will be fine. Now, look, guys, does anyone else think that-"

"You learn things from Natsu?" Mira asked, more interested in that than anything else in that moment. "I thought you just hated him."

"I don't hate him, Mira," he grumbled. "Sometimes I just…I dunno. He's such a hero type and I'm such an anti-hero that-"

"Cat," Gajeel grumbled as Levy found herself more drawn to Laxus' apparent insight into himself. "You're honestly jealous of-"

"Of course not! Mirajane is just-"

"Right," she said with an affirmative nod. "I do have a perfect record going, in case you guys missed it."

"You're an anti-hero?" Levy asked Laxus with a frown. "I mean, I guess I see that, but-"

"Of course I am. What else would I be?"

"Well-"

"I think," Mira said then, "that there are too many conversations going on right now to focus on what's really important. Mending Gajeel and Lily."

"There's nothing to mend," the Exceed insisted as Gajeel just glared down at him some more. "Honest. I…well…you and Levy do go out on a lot of dates."

"Ain't that the point?"

"We used to all hangout together," Lily said then. "What do you expect me to do when every single night you want to be alone with her?"

"I think we're all overlooking the fact that you're a cat," Laxus said. "And the whole point of having a cat is so that they're seen, but not heard. I mean-" There it was again! A flash of blue and white in his peripheral vision. He turned his head swiftly, but couldn't make anything out.

What was wrong with him?

"Lily is more than just a cat!" Gajeel wouldn't stand for that sort of talk. "Although…you sound kind of annoying right now."

"I did not even wish to discuss it this way. I-"

"If you're feeling left out, Lily," Levy said as she came to pick him up, like usual, "you could go out on dates with us. Sometimes. I mean, it's not like we're purposely excluding you."

Great. Now that she had her hold on him, it was nearly impossible to think poorly of her. Not that Pantherlily did to begin with, but, well…

"Of course we are," Gajeel said. "It's a date! That's the point. Don't you get that, cat?"

"Yes, Gajeel," he complained. It was so hard to look tough when Levy was rubbing at his ears, which she usually did when he was being disagreeable. She knew that it soothed him. "I do understand that. And I do not wish to intervene on your dates. I only wish that they did not happen, oh, every single day that one of you aren't on a job!"

"Are you yelling at me, cat?"

"No. I am just-"

"Gajeel," Levy complained, frowning at him. "Take a breath, okay? Lily is trying to tell me-"

"Nonsense. You guys are all trying to feed me nonsense and, well, I ain't-"

"You were much easier to counsel the first time," Mira observed. Gajeel just glared at her.

"You're not counseling people! You're just trapping them all together and making them talk to one another until things get resolved. Or don't. You don't care. Do you? No. You just want to be able to say that you have this perfect record."

"Ain't that what counseling is?" Laxus grumbled. "And stop talking to my demon that way!"

"What are you gonna do about it, sparky?"

"Unlike you, I don't gotta fight my woman's battles. She's perfectly capable of tearing your scrawny ass- There!" Suddenly, Laxus shot a bolt of lightning into the trees surrounding them, from which produced a loud shriek.

"Jubin!" they heard then as the others all jumped. Laxus, however, felt extremely accomplished over pinpointing and taking care of the person that they'd all ignored…until everyone realized they knew that voice.

"You shot Juvia," Levy exclaimed, rushing over to check on the other woman. Gajeel just glanced at the other slayer.

"What kind of anti-hero does this make you?" he asked.

"Ha ha."

"Thanks a lot, Laxus," Mira complained, heading over there as well. "How am I going to convince people to come to counseling if you shoot their friends?"

"She's stalking us! Does no one else get that?"

"It's, like, what she does," Lily said as Levy sat him down so that she could go help the other woman get to her feet. Laxus' lightning was not something to taken lightly. After all, electricity and water never mix well. "Or haven't you noticed?"

"Considering I didn't even pick up who she was from her scent," he said as he just crossed his arms, "I'm gonna go with no. And what's the big idea, Juvia? Huh? Following us?"

"Gee, Lax, let's try making sure she is okay before interrogating her?"

"Why, Mira? She's the one following-"

"Boy," Lily remarked to Levy as they helped Juvia to her feet. "He is an anti-hero, isn't he?"

"I'm not even sure if hero is the right-"

"Is this what you get for being introspective? Huh? Ridiculed?" Laxus snorted. "This is why I never talk to anyone of you. You all suck."

"Are you okay?" Mira was looking over Juvia then who nodded her head, though she also held a hand to it. "Are you sure?"

"What were you doing though?" Levy asked. "I mean, Gray isn't anywhere around and that's usually why you sneak around, right?"

"Uh, I'd like to get back to the fact that you have no reason to be jealous of Levy, Lily," Gajeel said as the cat glanced over at him once more. "I mean, come on. I'm trying here, huh? To be with the shrimp? I don't mean to make you feel like…whatever it is that you're feeling. You know that. You're my cat! We're the best pair there ever was and ever will be. But if you've been feeling left out, well, just speak up! You don't got to go through these two for that. Please. I don't rather like wasting that much time with them."

"Back at you, nut breath," Laxus grumbled making Gajeel glare at him and also reminding the two that they had been in a fight of sorts before Mirajane showed up.

"I came to see you in action, of course," Juvia was saying then to Mirajane who was just staring at her. "You speak highly of yourself, but I had to see it for myself."

"See what?"

"Well…" She seemed almost nervous then as she stared at her. "Your therapy skills."

"Grade A," Mirajane told her. "Look at some of my happy cl- Laxus! You can't hit him. He's a patient right now."

"Yeah, well," the lightning mage grumbled. "My  _patience_  is growing thin."

"Same here," Gajeel growled. "Cat! Shrimp! Come on. I've about tired of hanging around here. Let's go get some real training done."

Levy, after making sure that Juvia really was fine, went to pick up Lily once more and follow after her boyfriend.

"You must have really felt strongly that we were ignoring you," she said softly to Lily as they left. "To go to Laxus. I mean, you usually avoid him."

"Feeling strongly is, well, too strongly put," the cat said. "I merely-"

"It's alright, cat," Gajeel sighed once he knew that they were out of earshot of the others. "Thinking about it, maybe I have been neglecting you."

"It is not like Laxus said. I am not a child. I am-"

"Yeah, but we're friends," Gajeel said, which was the most established their relationship had ever been. "And if I ain't paying attention to ya, who will? You're my cat, aren't you?"

Finally, Lily smiled and Levy just grinned too. The last thing she ever wanted to do was drive a wedge between the two of them, after all.

Too bad for Laxus, things weren't looking up for him yet. Not at all.

"See?" Mira was saying about then to Juvia as, slowly, Laxus came over. "I made that happen. Twice now I've helped them through something. I mean, I'm practically their physician now."

"Yeah, demon, I don't think you know what that means," Laxus said before sighing. "And, uh, Juvia, I'm sorry if I shocked you or whatever, but… Why did you wanna know about Mira and her…er…skills?"

"It's just… Gray and I have not…"

"Haven't what?" Mira prompted, grinning like crazy as it became clear to her that she was once more getting a new client. "Hmmm?"

"Become an official couple," she said slowly.

"What? You two? No."

"Laxus, behave."

"We ain't a dating service," the man said simply. "And-"

"Dragon, go stand over there," Mira said, pointing to the other side of the clearing. "Now."

"What? No. I'm not a child! I-"

"Go."

"No!"

"Behave. And go. Do I have to start counting?"

Narrowing his eyes at her, he turned with a growl before taking to grumbling under his breath. Stupid demon and her demonic control and the fact that he loved her and stuff. Stupid, stupid, stupid!

Juvia was still staring at Mirajane expectantly. "You will help me then? With Gray? I just know that if you do whatever it is that you've done with Gajeel and Levy that he'll see the light."

"Well," Mira said slowly. "I do have a perfect record going and it'd be a shame to mess it up-"

"Are you saying then that you can't get Gray to admit his feelings for me?" Juvia asked. "Because wouldn't that mean that you shouldn't have a perfect one to begin with?"

That was enough to get the demon. Laxus could tell from across the clearing. It wasn't stupid Mirajane anymore. It was stupid him. Stupid, stupid him for trying to ever make her happy.

Gah! Why did he have to be such an amazing anti-hero?

And the walk back to the guildhall wasn't much better. Mirajane and Juvia just talked the entire time about that godforsaken (non) relationship she had going on with Gray and Laxus just hated himself for even being a part of all the demons schemes. He should be out training or dong jobs or just looking damn cool with his apathy as the Thunder Legion showered him with praises.

Eek. Even the Thunder Legion were becoming off limits, what with Bickslow tricking him and Ever ruining that double date. The only one that hadn't done him wrong was Freed and, well, the day the man did that, Laxus would be kissing his ass goodbye, because it would have to be the apocalypse.

 


	7. Chapter 7

  


If there was one thing that Laxus liked about Gray, it was that the man typically left him the fuck alone. It was a quality that the man wished more of his guild mates possessed, but alas, that was just wishful thinking.

The downside to this though was that Laxus knew very little about Gray. Most importantly, how to bribe him into at least pretending to go on a date with the love stricken Juvia. Because, if there was one thing that Laxus knew for certain about the man, it was that he obviously did  _not_  want to be involved with her. Or, if he did, he had forced the feeling so deep down and covered it with so much denial that there wasn't anything short of the Second Coming that was going to drag it back out of him.

He had a few days to figure it out though, as Gray was out on a job and unavailable for a bit. Secretly, he was hoping that maybe the demon would forget about it or Juvia would, before the man arrived back in Magnolia. No such luck as, one day, he came strolling into the bar, all unsuspecting and shit.

Poor guy. If Laxus had any pity to spare, he'd use it on him. Instead, it was all going to himself for the time being and nothing could take that away.

Mirajane, however, was only optimistic. Then again, she was that way in most things, so that wasn't anything new. When Gray entered, the first thing she did was call him over to the bar.

"Hey, Mira," he greeted. "What's up?"

"I-"

"Well, for one," Laxus grumbled from where he was already sitting on a stool, having been watching his girlfriend work for the past hour or so, "take your damn hand away from your crotch when you're talking to my woman."

That was unconscious on Gray's part as, being in the building, he found it to be hot and had begun to strip. At Laxus saying that though, he frowned, glancing down at his hands before shrugging.

"Well, what did you want?" he insisted as he moved to hold his hands behind his head. "Mirajane? Something important?"

"Sit down, sit down," she said, gesturing to the stool next to Laxus. "I just feel like the two of us don't get a chance to speak anymore. I want to catch up, you know?"

He blinked. Then he glanced at Laxus who narrowed his eyes in return.

"Well," the ice mage said as he slowly sat down two stools over, leaving one between him and the other man, "not much has been going on to talk about, I don't think. But if you really want to talk-"

"I do," she insisted, nodding her head. "About everything."

Cue turning up his headphones.

As Laxus got to work doing that, Gray just frowned.

"What brought this on?" he asked her. "Something I should know?"

"Of course not, Gray." She feigned as if she were insulted. "I'm hurt that you don't value our friendship enough to-"

"Okay, I give," he said quickly, knowing all it would take was a few tears out of the woman for Laxus to punch his lights out. "You wanna begin or what?"

Nodding, Mirajane said, "Well, I mean, not much has changed with me. I spend most of my time here, you know, at my main job."

"Main job?" he repeated. "What's your secondary one?"

"Well, I don't know if you know this, but I'm sort of a therapist extraordinaire now, so-"

"Demon," Laxus groaned. "You cannot be serious."

"Yeah, I heard something about that," Gray said slowly as Mirajane went to go get him a beer. "You helped Natsu and Lucy, huh? And then Happy won't shut up about what you did for him."

"Oh, I didn't do much, really," Mirajane said slowly, as if attempting to be modest. Laxus wasn't buying it. "But I also got Gajeel and Levy together, helped Bickslow and Lisanna, and-"

"You've been quite busy," Gray remarked, still not suspicious in the slightest. Sigh. Laxus expected more from him.

"Well," Mirajane said then. "I haven't been doing it alone, you know. Laxus has been a big help."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Tell him, Lax."

"Tell him what?" the slayer grumbled. "Huh?"

"About how helpful you've been."

Oh? She meant how he'd basically orchestrated most of the sessions to set her up for winning? Did she want him to mention that?

"I've helped," was all he grumbled as Mirajane giggled and Gray shrugged.

"Maybe it's your calling," he suggested as Laxus sent him a glare.

"It's definitely mine," Mirajane told him then. "I've helped so many people with so many things. I'm practically a master at it by now, I figure."

"Sounds like it," Gray said after taking a sip of his beer. Laxus just grunted though. Great. So Gray was going to build up her ego even more.

"There's not anything that you need help with, is there, Gray?" the she-devil was asking then. He didn't even think about it.

"Nope," he said with a slight shake of his head. "Nothing going on in my life at all."

"Surely there's something," she prompted. "Everyone has something that they need counseling on."

"Can't think of a thing," he told her truthfully. "But I'll come to you first, huh? If I ever do?"

"I guess so," she sighed, as if disappointed. "Well, that's enough about me. What about you? What have you been up to?"

"Nothing, really."

"So no interesting romances?"

"Eh?" Gray about choked on a sip of beer. "What are you talking about?"

"The demon's hintin' at you being with a woman," Laxus grumbled.

"Got that," he complained before looking back to Mirajane. "But why would you ask that?"

"I dunno. It just feels like everyone's all paired off and happy," she told him. "And poor you, you're all alone."

"Trust me," he told her. "If I wanted a woman, I could get a woman."

"Just curious," Mirajane told him with a slight shrug. "I already told you about how I put Gajeel and Levy together."

"You mentioned it."

"So if there was anyone in the hall that you wanted to gt together with, well, I'd be more than happy-"

"No one," he told her. "Seriously. Not at all."

That made Mira frown some, but about then someone was calling for her at one of the tables, wanting something to eat.

"I'll be back," she told Gray before rushing off.

Then there were two.

"Your chick's kinda hyper today," Gray grumbled to Laxus, "isn't she?"

Instead of answering, Laxus just reached up to unlatch one of his headphones before glancing at the other man.

"You ever want something, Gray?" he asked. "I mean, really, really want something?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Because I want something," he said. "And to get that something, I have to go through you."

Blinking, Gray said, "Look, whatever you and Freed do together is between the two of you, but I'm not-"

"What?" Laxus glared at him then. "Freed and I aren't-"

"I won't tell Mira about this, but honestly, Laxus, you shouldn't cheat on her. For one, she's already crazy. And then you factor in her brother-"

"I'm not…propositioning you," he growled. "And Freed and I don't… I oughta kill you for even suggesting it! You little-"

"Alright, alright, alright," Gray said, holding up his hands. "I'm sorry. I just… What were you talking about then? What do you want?"

Laxus had to take a few deep breaths to calm himself down once more. Once that was over, he said simply, "For the demon to be happy."

"How does that involve me, exact?" Gray asked, heart still pounding in his chest slightly. "Huh? I mean-"

"I need you to play along, alright?"

"Play along with what?"

Glancing around, Laxus leaned closer before saying, "She's going to bring up you and Juvia-"

"Whoa, whoa, wait. I-"

"Look," Laxus grumbled. "You're gonna help me with this."

"And why the hell would I do that?"

"Look, I'll owe you one, alright?"

"Owe me what?"

"Whatever you want."

"But I don't want-"

"Okay, I'm back," Mirajane called out as she appeared before them at the bar once more. "What were you guys talking about?"

"Nothing," Laxus grumbled before Gray could say anything. He also gave the other man a hard look, as if a warning glance, before facing forwards once more. "I need a refill, demon."

As she went to work on that, Laxus just grumbled softly to Gray, "Bring up Juvia."

"No," he hissed back.

"You can either be on my side," Laxus told him stiffly. "Or I can destroy you. The choice is yours."

Destroy him, huh? With a frown, Gray got to his feet.

"Maybe we can talk later, Mirajane," he called over to her. "Alright?"

"Alright," she called out slowly, as if unsure. The second he was gone, she gave Laxus an evil stare.

"What?" he grumbled.

"You scared him off!"

"I did no." Maybe. Who cared? "You did."

"No, Laxus, I didn't. I was easing into things and it's pretty clear that you ruined that."

"Look," he told her gruffly. "I didn't do nothing. At all. And so what? You swung and missed. You still got two more chances. And that's not counting balls."

"What are you talking about?"

With a sigh, Laxus glanced around. "You didn't fix Gray and Juvia this time, but it's not over. Let me find someone else for you today, okay? Just give me a second."

"I don't want someone else," Mira complained. "I want-"

"Here." Laxus got to his feet before walking a little further down the bar. "Are you so blinded by damn Juvia to miss out on poor Cana here?"

"Poor Cana?" The woman was, at that moment, on her second barrel and just frowned as Laxus came to stand by her. "What are you getting at, huh? Know something I don't?"

"Clearly," Laxus said as Mirajane made a face over at him. "Cana has issues."

"I do not," she grumbled, frowning up at him. "I-"

"I mean, who would ever wanna date her? Huh? A drunk? A sloppy one at that? A-"

"What is your-"

"Just play the hell along," Laxus grumbled softly to Cana. "And I'll make it worth your while."

"Sorry, sparky," she replied, "but you can't get me drunk enough for that."

"What the hell is up with everyone and thinking that I'm hitting on them? I mean, seriously?"

"Laxus," Mirajane said, coming over then. "Are you drunk or something?"

"No." Unfortunately. "I just-"

"If the two of you must know," Cana said as she sat her barrel on the ground. "I actually have a date tonight."

"Really?" And suddenly, Mira forgot all about Laxus and his apparent sobriety (or lack there of), as she rushed to go stand in front of Cana. "With who?"

"Bacchus," she said with a shrug. "He's coming into town and we're-"

"You're welcome," Laxus told his girlfriend then.

"What?" she asked with a frown. "Why are you-"

"Two drunks? Meeting up? You don't think that the two of them need some form of counseling?" Laxus made a face. "I mean, even without a relationship added in, it's pretty clear that Cana has some problems."

"You know," Cana said then to Mira. "No one rather likes you with him."

Growling then, Laxus said, "I just meant, Mirajane, that if you want to find someone to counsel today, Cana and her loser drunk boyfriend are your prime candidates."

"Do you have anything then?" Mirajane asked her, sounding some what doubtful. "Cana? That you and Bacchus need discussed?"

"Worth your while," Laxus mumbled again.

"Well," the woman said slowly, "we have been fighting recently, I guess. Remember, Mirajane? I told you about it?"

"You guys fight literally every time he comes to town," Laxus pointed out. It comes with the drunk territory.

"Yeah," Mira sighed. "You're gonna have to be a tad more specific."

"About how he always wants me to-"

"Oh, I remember," Mira said quickly.

"Remember what?" Laxus grumbled. "She didn't even finish her thought!"

"You could help us through that, I guess," Cana offered. "If you really-"

"Yes! Of course!"

"What are we talking about?" Laxus complained.

"Oh, dragon," Mirajane giggled. "You'll see."

"Bacchus and I were gonna get something to eat and then go out drinking," Cana told Mirajane. "The second he gets in town. You and Laxus are welcome to tag along."

"Yes! Okay. I'll just have to tell Kinana and Lisanna that I won't be here for the night shift, but it won't be a problem."

She was being called off then and rushed away, leaving the other two mages alone.

"So what do you want then?" Laxus asked. "What-"

Cana just picked up her barrel once more before saying, "You're coverin' me and Bacchus' tab. All night."

"What?"

"You heard me. A deal's a deal."

"No way! That-"

"Unless you'd rather I cancel with Mirajane-"

"Damn you, Cana," he growled as he turned to walk away. And damn the demon too.

Since when did she become so expensive?

* * *

"What's the catch?" Bacchus complained to Cana as they sat at a restaurant, waiting for the apparent other couple they were meeting up with. They were on an outside patio with the sun setting and it was really nice and, well, the perfect night to find a seedy bar to get drunk and fight in. Especially on Laxus' dime.

"There isn't a catch," she told him while glancing over the menu. And by menu, she totally meant the wine menu. If Laxus was covering, she was guzzling. "That's the point."

"So the guy is just paying for the two of us to drink and wants nothing in return. Seems legit. What? I gotta let him fuck you or something in return? Because if so, I might just be bought."

Making a face over at him, Cana said, "All we gotta do is let Mirajane pretend to give us some therapy."

"Therapy, huh?"

"Uh-huh," she said nodding her head slightly. "That simple."

"Don't sound simple," he grumbled. "I mean, what's she helping us through anyways? And why does she want to?"

"You're always so suspicious when you're sober."

That was true. Get a few shots or beers in him and he wouldn't care what Mira and Laxus wanted from them. They could be harvesting their organs, just so long as he got some good drinks out of it.

"Yeah, well," he muttered, "I just don't get what they could want with us."

"Mira's real…simple about things. We just gotta fight a little, let her fix us, and then everything will be fine. And Laxus has to pay for the entire night."

"He better have brought his wallet," Bacchus remarked. "Because I'm drinking myself into a coma then."

When Mirajane and Laxus showed up, the demon seemed to be in a good enough mood. Laxus though, when he saw that Cana had already ordered a bottle of wine and was drinking straight from it was having second thoughts. Then again, it was probably closer to quadruple doubts, because he'd been having them all day.

It was amazing the things he was not only willing to do for her, but also content in her never finding out about. Things that he couldn't even cash in on.

"Hi, Bacchus," Mirajane greeted as she took her seat. The table was littered then with a few beer bottles as well as one resting in his hand. Great. So he was gonna run up Laxus' bill too.

"Ah," he said with a grin. "Cana told me that you'd be joinin' us, I was hopin' you'd be coming from a modelin' shoot or something. At least give me something to look at."

Right. Laxus couldn't remember why he hated the other guy so much, but, thankfully, he was always there to remind him.

They'd tried the whole group date thing a few times before. Cana and Mirajane were such good friends and, well, Laxus liked the other woman enough, so one would think that it'd work out perfectly.

The problem was, though, Bacchus. Nothing else, no one else, but Bacchus. There wasn't a woman that he didn't hit on when he was out, Cana with him or not, and at times, Laxus wondered how she put up with it.

Then he would remember the time that the four of them were supposed to go out drinking together, but the demon had to work late and couldn't make it, so Laxus went with just the two of them. It had been horrible. Bacchus was busy picking up women as Cana flirted her way though nearly every bar they went to until, finally, they both got into a big fight with one another that involved punches being thrown and cards being tossed, but, somehow, ended in the two heading back to dormitory to sneak him in so they could screw.

If there was ever a relationship that Laxus didn't even pretend to understand, it was the one that Cana had with the other drunkard.

And that was the one that Mirajane wanted to counsel?

"You're so sweet," Mirajane told him, giggling, as if had Laxus said it, he wouldn't have gotten rebuked. "Did you have a good train ride in?"

"It was alright," Bacchus said with a shrug. "Lot less appealing when I know I'm comin' here instead of going out on a job. Least them I get something out of it."

"Ooh," Cana slurred as she leered over at the man. "What? You tryin' to talk bad about me, huh?"

"I didn't say nothing about you," the man grumbled as he slung back some more of his beer. "Just said that I hate comin' to your shit town to hangout at your shit guild when my guild is, not only better, but also less shitty."

Mirajane had lost her jolliness then and glanced at Laxus, but he was just looking back and between Cana and her date. He'd told her to give them something to work with, but this?

Or…were they honestly about to fight? Laxus knew that Mira could handle fabricated things, but she'd hardly weathered Natsu and Lucy. He'd hate for her to get her perfect record broken by two drunks.

"See, Mirajane?" Cana gestured to him then. Well, if one could call it a gesture. Whatever it was, it almost made her stumble out of her chair. "He's always talkin' bad about Fairy Tail, like that's what's gonna make me wanna join Quatro Cerberus."

"You ain't wild enough to join anyhow," he retorted. "Can't even hold your liquor. Not with the big boys anyhow."

"Uh, demon," Laxus mumbled then as Cana went off on Bacchus for his comment. "I think this is where you're supposed to start, you know, counseling them."

"Oh," she whispered. "Right. They just startled me was all."

"They are quite the pair," he agreed softly.

"-talk bad about me in front of my friends."

"Like you don't do it to me, Cana!"

"I don't."

"You do too."

"No way."

"Yes, way. You-"

"Hey now," Mirajane intervened. "Maybe take a breather here, guys. I mean, what are you even arguing over? He didn't offend us, Cana, if that's the problem."

"I'd never try to offend someone such as you anyhow," Bacchus said then, even winking at her. That was enough for Cana who responded by reaching over to hit at Bacchus. She was off balance though and toppled over, falling backwards in her chair and into a waitress who was passing with a few glasses of water and such, causing, of course, her to fall as well.

And who did the water end up on?

"Oh!" Mira exclaimed as she literally got drenched. Laxus stood in his seat as Bacchus just made a face down at Cana.

"Hold your liquor my ass," he remarked.

"I've been drinkin' all day just fine," she remarked as he helped her back up and Laxus glared over at them. "Think you slipped me somethin'."

"As if I need to," he grumbled. "You're all sloppy already."

"Are you alright?" Mirajane, like always, was more concerned about the waitress that Cana had knocked over. She even got up to help her to her feet. When the woman nodded, though she did spare a glare over at Cana, Mirajane looked back at her friends.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom," she told them as she picked up some napkins and tried in vain to at least dab out some of the water that had her soaked already. "Be right back, guys."

"You idiots," Laxus hissed after she was gone. "Where do you get off-"

"Chill out," Cana said as she, with a lot more coordination than before, leaned over to take Bacchus beer from him and take a sip. "You told me to make it convincing, yeah?"

"You did that on purpose?" he howled then. "Cana-"

"Wasn't that the point?" Bacchus seemed to drop his distaste of Cana then as she decided to just finish off his beer while he said nothing. "For you to pay for our drinks and we let your women see us argue or something?"

"No," Laxus grumbled. "The point is for Mirajane to mend the two of you after you have a fight. Not get drenched in water and listen to two idiots argue over nothing!"

"I don't think I like your tone," Bacchus said, his grin falling some.

"And I don't think I give a shit."

"Hey now," Cana chided as she went back to her bottle of wine with a wink. "Don't get to fighting over me boys."

"So that is the catch?"

"No one is fighting over anything," Laxus told them. "Other than the two of you. And make it a lot easier for Mira to fix. If she can't fix it, then I won't be paying for crap."

"What?" Cana slammed the wine bottle back down. "But I ordered the most expensive type on the menu!"

"You what?" Laxus exclaimed.

"And I'm only getting started on these beers here," Bacchus said. "When I get to the bar, well-"

"You make the demon think she's done good or else you won't be doing anything."

"That's not fair, Laxus," Cana said. "It wasn't part of the deal."

"It is now."

"Mmmm," Bacchus grunted. "Much rather just forgo the tab pay off and me and you do a little switch, huh?"

"What's he talking about now?" Laxus complained. Cana just frowned over at him, letting him respond.

"You know," he said with a shrug. "You get Cana here, I get your little demon-"

"Deals off," Laxus growled, bucking up then. "You stupid-"

"Now you're just being rude," Cana remarked as the man cackled. "No, seriously."

"Aw, Cana, you know I was just jokin'. Like I'd trade you in for-"

"Not that. Like I care about that," she said, still glaring. "You pissed off Laxus and my chance to get him to foot the bill. Thanks a lot."

Laxus only shook his head. "Please don't reproduce."

"Trust me," Bacchus remarked. "We ain't trying."

"Laxus, are you insulting people again?"

Mirajane was back. When Laxus glanced at her, he about did a double take.

"Where'd you get the other dress from?" he asked, taking in the new one that she was sporting. "Demon?"

"I just used my transformation magic to, you know, transform into another one."

He blinked. "Then why do I ever buy you new ones if you can just-"

"Because, Lax," she said as she reclaimed her seat, "you have to do something for me. I mean, I do so much for you. It's only fair."

Oh, if only she knew…

"You look just as great in this," Bacchus complimented her as Mirajane only giggled.

Cana though was much more concerned with Laxus and keeping him from storming off. There was no way she'd be able to afford that bottle of wine…

"Mira," the other woman said then, glancing back at the barmaid. "You came here for a reason, remember? You were going to help Bacchus and I-"

"Oh, of course," she said, sitting up then and clapping her hands. "You wanted to talk about how Bacchus wants you to leave Magnolia, right? Well, I for one and wholly against that."

Laxus wasn't. Not in that moment, at least. Still though, after narrowing his eyes at Cana, he moved to take his seat once more. Might as well see it all through.

"But," the demon went on because, well, the demon always went on, "it would be a big step in your relationship and a show of good faith towards it having a happier future."

"I'm plenty happy now," Cana remarked. Bacchus shrugged.

"I've been happier."

"Or," Mirajane began then, "you could always come here, Bacchus. Have you guys not thought about-"

"No," Cana was quick to say, glaring at Mira then for the suggest. "He can't."

"Why can't I?" he asked her with a frown.

"Do you want to?"

"Well, no," he said with a shake of his head. "But I wanna know what you're hiding from me that I can't come here."

"Nothing," she complained. "I just don't want you here, that's all."

"Why?"

"Yeah," Laxus grumbled, knowing if he stayed too silent, Mirajane would take notice. "Why?"

"I-"

"Are you ready to order?"

If Cana thought that the waitress coming by saved her, she was wrong. Because the second they all had, Mira was back to the heart of the problem.

"So?" she prompted, sounding like less of a therapist and more like the gossip crazed freak Laxus knew and loved. "What is it, Cana? Why don't you want to live with Bacchus? Or at least have him come here?"

"Yeah, Cana," Laxus asked. "What's up?"

Shifting slightly in her seat, the card wielder said, "It would just be different, Bacchus. That's all. Being around one another constantly. That's not our thing."

"It could be our thing."

"It wouldn't work though," she argued. "I like it better this way, only seeing one another randomly and never having to worry about what the other's doing. If we were both in the same guild, you'd be in my business and I'd be in yours and-"

"What are you hiding though?" Mira asked.

"Nothing," the other woman insisted. "But I would feel like I'd have to start if we were around one another constantly. Besides, I like Fairy Tail. And you're committed to your guild too. There's no compromise."

"I guess you're right," Bacchus said slowly before nodding his head. Mirajane though, who'd been on the edge of her seat before, slumped back in annoyance then.

"That's it?" she asked with a frown. "That was all you guys needed help with?"

"That's just how good you are, demon," Laxus complimented.

"Yeah, but…I was hoping for a bit more."

He wasn't. In fact, he was coming around to Bacchus and Cana finally. They'd been by far the fastest of the couples they'd 'counseled' and, well, that was always to be appreciated. Sure, there were tons of other things wrong with them, but there was no way that Mirajane could really help with those, so Laxus was going to keep quiet and not mention a single one.

"You're so sweet, dragon," Mirajane complimented when the night was over. "Paying for everything and everyone."

He just grunted though as they stood outside the restaurant, Bacchus and Cana waiting for him across the street, in front of a bar.

"You sure that you wanna hangout with them tonight though?" Mirajane asked. She wanted to go back to the guild and check on things. Not that she didn't trust Lisanna, but… "I know that last time you didn't like it much. Being alone with them, I mean."

"I'll be fine," he said, glancing over at the couple who, at the moment, had their arms around one another and seemed to be in a decent mood. The first bar they hit, Laxus knew that would change. "Besides, I kinda made a promise to them, you know?"

"Mmmm. Well, I'll see you tomorrow, I guess-"

"What? No." He grinned at her. "I'll stop by your home after I finish with these clowns. Spend the night."

"You sure?"

"Very," he said before reaching out to gently tap his knuckles against her head. "You just put some more thought into this Gray and Juvia stuff, huh?"

"Oh, I am," she said as, after pressing a kiss to his cheek, she turned to walk off. "Trust me, I am."

So was he. Only he was trying to figure out more how to rig the whole thing without fixing a thing.

 


	8. Chapter 8

  


"How much more thought have you put into Gray and I?"

"A lot, actually," Mirajane told Juvia one day as the latter sat up at the bar, just to talk to the waitress. "And I think I'm wearing him down to the idea."

"Wearing him down?"

"Every single time that I see him, I always make sure to speak about you and just how great you would both be together. Slowly, but surely he will begin to-"

"No, no," Juvia sighed then. "That will not work."

Mirajane frowned. "Why not?"

"Same reason I tried to tell you, demon," Laxus grumbled from where he sat next to the water woman on the other side of the bar. "Juvia's been dong that for years."

"And years," the woman agreed.

"And if it don't work for her, why do you think that it will for you?" Laxus asked. "Huh?"

"Uh, gee, Lax. Did you miss my perfect record or what?"

He just shook his head. "Whatever you say, demon."

"Laxus is slightly right though," the woman said, putting a finger to her lips as she thought. "I've put a lot into this, Juvia, but I just can't seem to find anything. But I'm trying, okay? Gray is, as you know, very resistant."

"Yes," the woman agreed. "It is his one flaw, I suppose."

"One?" Laxus snorted. "Do you honestly believe-"

"Although," Juvia went on. "His resistance has also kept him out of the clutches of all those evil love rivals."

"That's looking on the bright side," Mirajane remarked with a smile and a nod.

"Demon, seriously," her boyfriend sighed. "Don't encourage this."

But then again, she was just as deluded as the water mage, in vastly different ways, fine, but just as detrimentally.

While they were sitting there though, someone else approached their area of the bar. Erza, to be precise, and though Mira was more than keyed in on Juvia at the moment, she always had time to spare for the reequip mage.

"Wow, Erza," she greeted the other woman. "You look rather chipper today."

"Do I?" she asked. "I feel no more than usual."

"You are grinning quite a lot," Juvia remarked, glancing up at her as well. "Perhaps you have come up with a plan for Mirajane to implement on Gray?"

"Is something wrong with him?" Erza glanced around for the man. "I did not know that we needed to formulate a plan. What is the endgame of this plan?"

Laxus just sighed. "Not you too."

"What? I do not understand why-"

"The plan isn't important," Mira was quick to say. As much fun as Juvia and Gray were, whatever Erza had going on was usually far more entertaining. "What's got you so happy?"

"I honestly can think of nothing," the woman said as she took a seat on the other side of Juvia. "It is you who accuses me of being so."

"Accuse is a harsh word," Mira remarked simply. "But if you really having nothing to be happy about-"

"Of course I have things to be happy about," Erza retorted. "Just nothing overly so. That is all I mean."

Laxus rolled his eyes. "Tell me the point of this conversation again? Someone? Please?"

"We were talking about my beloved," Juvia intervened, frowning over at Mirajane. "But apparently Erza's happiness is being called into question for some reason."

"We're still talking about Gray," Mira assured her. "Or at least thinking about him. These sorts of things take time. After all, you two aren't the conventional pair that Laxus and I counsel."

"Conventional?" Laxus snorted. "Mira, you made me spend time getting one cat to agree to fuck another, and you wanna talk about conventional?"

The demon's eyes were dark then as they turned back to her boyfriend.

"Laxus," she hissed. "For the last time, that was not what Happy wanted."

"How do you know? As a man, I think that I would be a little more keyed in on what another…sorta man would want from a date." He looked to Juvia then. "You want Gray? Huh? Sleep with him. Make it good. You'll have him for awhile then."

"Out, Laxus."

"Mirajane-"

She just pointed. "Go away. Out of the guild."

"Fine," he grumbled, getting to his feet. "But don't come crying to me when your stupid plan with Gray don't work. I just gave you the best one there is."

" _Go_!"

Stupid demon, giving him all those problems. So what? Sometimes he talked about sex. Who cares? Who didn't? Maybe if they all talked about it a little more, they wouldn't be so skittish to the idea.

He wasn't going to leave the guild though! She couldn't tell him what to do. He got to choose what he did. And, at the moment, he chose to go sit with his Thunder Legion and lick his wounds. In her face.

"Laxus," Freed greeted with a grin. "Troubles with your girlfriend? Perhaps a breakup on the horizon? Maybe even you needing someone to help you get over-"

"Not now, Freed," he growled as Bickslow, who was sitting there too, made a face.

"Don't hit on the boss in front of Lissy," he complained. "It's very awkward for her!"

"Yeah, Freed," Lisanna complained. "That is sorta my sister."

"Sorta," Bickslow agreed. Then, to Laxus, he said, "You'll be happy to know that me and Lissy have decided that we're the most important people to one another."

"Why would I be happy to know that?"

"Because," he went on. "Before, Mira was one of Lissy's people and you were one of mine. Now though, you both are taking a step down on our list and we're devoting ourselves only to one another."

"I'm still not seeing why I should be happy about this-"

"It means that he won't stalk you anymore," Lisanna said.

"I never stalked-"

"Bicks, you did it. Admit it. Get over it."

He sent her a glare before looking back over at Laxus. "The point is, boss, that I'm recommitting myself. To Lissy here."

"And what does that mean for me?" Laxus asked. "Exactly?"

"That he won't bother you as much," Lisanna told him.

"Right. So he's going to bother you instead." Laxus shook his head. "Have fun with that."

"Oh, we are," Bickslow insisted. "You just watch."

"Rather not."

"Why were you sent over here anyways?" Freed wanted to get back to that. "Laxus?"

"What are you talkin' about? I wasn't sent anywhere," he grumbled. "Mirajane can't send me away. I'm not a dog. And she especially can't do it because I got a tad too vulgar for her tastes."

"Right," Lisanna said slowly. "So you were sent away because you were being disgusting."

"Oy, boss, you're an inspiration," Bickslow snickered. "Standing up to the she-demon? You have some guts. Look! Here she comes now."

"What?" Laxus glanced around, as if fearful. "She's still over at the- Damn it, Bickslow."

He and Lisanna had a good laugh about that one. Laxus just gave them both a look though.

"Uh, Lissy?" Bickslow sobered quickly. "Boss looks mad."

"I think he is."

"Maybe we went too far."

"Mmmm…nah."

More snickers.

Then a growl.

"I can hear you idiots," Laxus grumbled. "And-"

"Hi, Mira," Lisanna called, staring passed him. He just narrowed his eyes.

"I'm falling for-"

"Dragon." Suddenly, there was a new beer sat in front of him and a frowning Mira beside him. Huh. "We have to-"

"I don't wanna talk to you right now," he grumbled, looking over at Freed. "I'm busy."

That got him a tap on the head and her a scowl.

"We're going out tonight," Mirajane told him then. "With-"

"No way. I already helped Juvia," he complained. "Gave her real sound advice."

"Laxus." She shook her head. "And not with Juvia. We're going out with Erza."

"Erza?" Bickslow made a face. "Don't do it, boss. Clearly a trap. Mirajane and Erza are taking you, the next guy higher than them in the guild, out? No way. Na-ah."

"I am inclined to go with him," Freed said softly. "It doesn't sound like a good idea at all."

"Yeah, Mira," Lisanna said slowly. "Maybe you should have pitched it better."

Laxus snorted. "I'm not afraid of going out with the two of them. Why would I be? They couldn't take me if they- Mira, you are not allowed to pinch me here!"

She did it again. "Behave. And we're talking Erza out so that I can find out what's wrong with her."

"You can't do that here because-"

"She keeps deflecting," the woman told him. "And Juvia won't stop talking about Gray."

"You brought that one on yourself," her boyfriend said simply. "And why do I gotta go with you and Erza? Huh? That's not fair. I-"

"Because, Laxus," she said with a frown, "you're going to pay."

"What? No."

"Yes."

"Mira-"

"It's the friendly thing to do."

"Why are we concerned with Erza again?" Lisanna asked. "Sis?"

"She's too happy."

"I thought you liked people happy, demon," Laxus complained.

"Not fake happy."

"Why does she have to be faking?"

"Either she's faking," Mira said slowly, "or she's actually really happy about something. In which case I deserve to know what."

"Me and Lissy wanna go," Bickslow said. "We-"

"No." Mira shut that one down quick. "You guys can't come."

"Fine! We didn't wanna anyways."

"You literally just asked," Freed sighed. "And I would beg a chance to accompany you, if I may. Clearly there would be three of you, yes? And that wouldn't be-"

"Jellal's coming."

"What?" Even Laxus did a double take at that. "Did you say-"

"He'll be in town tonight. Erza said so," the woman said with a slight shrug. "So I suggested that we all go-"

"Did it ever occur to you, Mira," Lisanna sked slowly, "that she's happy over that?"

"No. Why would she be? They're just fri-"

"When did you get so sneaky, Mirajane?" Laxus frowned up at her then, though a smirk threatened to poke through. "You silly little demon."

"What are you talking about? I'm not-"

"You don't want to go to find out what's wrong with Erza," Laxus accused then. "You just want to go so that we can try and counsel them. But you knew pitching it to me like that would make me not want to go. Again. For, what is it now? The millionth time?"

"You're not too good with numbers, are you, boss?"

"Shut up, Bickslow," he grumbled as the man and Lisanna snickered again. "And c'mere, demon."

She finally giggled then, when he pulled her down into his lap.

"Laxus-"

"We," he complained, "are not going to counsel Erza. At all. We haven't been on an actual date, just you and me, in weeks."

"Lax, we can't go out on a date."

"Why not?"

"Because I have to work."

"I'm confused," he said with a frown. "How exactly aren't you working if we take Erza and Jellal out?"

"Because then I'm taking off."

"It make sense to me," Lisanna told him.

"Completely," Bickslow agreed.

"You two are about to get it," he grumbled to their enjoyment. "Annoying idiots."

Mira just grinned at him though. "We are definitely going out tonight with Erza and Jellal. It's happening. Stop trying to fight it."

He knew better, after all. It was a useless endeavor. Once the demon had decided something, especially something that involved the two of them together, it was just a done deal.

"And Freed," she went on, glancing over at the man. "I'm sorry, but you can't come. If you had a date, maybe, but without one-"

"But-"

"Hey," Bickslow grumbled, cutting off his teammate. "That's no fair."

"Yeah," Lisanna agreed. "That's totally not fair. Like, at all. Me and Bickslow are each others date, but you said that we can't come."

"And we still stand by that," Laxus agreed.

"It's almost like you're making up separate rules," Bickslow grumbled. "A reason why Freed can't go, a different one for us. It's bull."

"It is," his girlfriend agreed. "What's wrong with us, guys? Huh? That you don't want to be around us?"

"Yeah," the seith kept up. "It's like we're damaged goods or something, me and Lissy. You healed us once and think it's all finished. It's not! We still have problems."

"We do?" The younger Strauss glanced at him before at her sister. "We do."

"Serious ones," Bickslow went on. "Lissy believes in ghost and I don't. Fix us, Mira."

She blinked. "How do you not believe in ghosts? Aren't those what your babies are?"

"How dare you?"

"Yeah, Mira," Lisanna agreed. "How dare you?"

"W-What did I-"

"They're not ghosts," Bickslow howled. "Ignorance."

"Ignorance!" his babies, who'd been rather quiet up till then, cried, taking to the air from where they'd sat at the table previously. "Ignorance!"

"Laxus, what did I do?" She glanced up at him, but he only shook his head.

"Souls are ghosts, you dopes," he grumbled to Bickslow and Lisanna.

"Are not."

"Are too."

"I'm not arguing with you guys."

"Yeah," Lisanna agreed. "Because you're wrong."

Laxus growled. "Mira, I can't take them."

"You're the one that came to sit with them," she pointed out. "Dragon."

"Because you made me leave!"

"Ha!" Bickslow and Lisanna high-five before the seith said, "So she did make you do it."

"I hate them." Laxus just shook his head. "I really do."

"Not to be a bother," Freed tried then. "But I do have to agree with them somewhat. I mean, surely I would not be that much of a problem out on your dinner with Erza and Jellal, would I?"

"Freed, you can't go," Laxus told him then with a frown. "Just stop asking. You don't have a date, which make you ineligible. Lisanna and Bickslow, you're annoying as hell. Also ineligible. So stop asking."

"Does that mean that we'll go, dragon?" Mirajane asked. He only gently shoved her back out of his lap so she could get back to work.

"As if there was a chance we weren't."

Bickslow just shook his head though before looking back at Lisanna. "I'm starting to think that we're, like, not their favorite people or something."

"No," she sighed. "I'm definitely Mira's favorite. You're just not Laxus'. And you're screwing everything up."

"That's not a very nice thing to say."

"But it's true," Laxus told them from where he was still sitting. Lisanna just patted the man's cheek. "Very true."

"At least you were allowed to be with them," Freed grumbled. "Once."

Sighing, the Thunder God glanced at his most loyal follower then. "Freed, honestly, it's not that we don't like you. Believe me; me and Mira like you a whole lot more than Evergreen or Bickslow."

"There goes my heart, shattering into a million pieces," Bickslow mumbled as Lisanna patted his cheek again. "I'm serous, boss. Think of your words before you say them sometimes, huh?"

Freed just ignored that though as he asked, "Then why-"

"You just aren't dating anyone," Laxus said with a shrug. "If you had someone, I would definitely let you and that…person help fool Mirajane. But as it is, you're useless in this category."

"He really is hurtful today, isn't he?"

"He sure is, Lissy."

Freed bowed his head. If it was for him to get a significant other that his idol wanted, than that was exactly what Freed would get!

Of course, at the moment, the only thing that Laxus truly wanted was for Bickslow and Lisanna to either bug off or show him some damn respect, but then again, very rarely were he and Freed on the same page about frivolous things.

Great. The last thing that he wanted at the moment was to do another damn therapy thing. Mira was starting to grate on his sanity. He'd thought that they'd burned through everyone already.

Who the hell wanted to deal with Erza? And her stupid friend? Not Laxus. If they were going into battle, sure, he'd bring both of them along. Have a grand ol' time. But just dinner? Fucking dinner?

No. Na-ah.

And didn't Jellal have more pressing matters than eating dinner with a woman he'd never end up with anyways?

Ugh. The demon and her schemes. It almost made Laxus sick.

Had he known the one that Freed was crafting himself right next to him about then, he might have truly gotten sick. But alas, that was another problem for another day.

* * *

"So let me get this straight," Laxus began. "You just so happened to be coming near Magnolia, felt the need to stop in on Erza, and just got weaseled into coming to this dinner?"

"We did not plan it, if that is what you are asking," Jellal answered stiffly as the two men sat at the table, Jellal still with his hat pulled down low, though the scarf wasn't as high up on his face. "Why would we?"

"Just curious," Laxus said, glancing around the nearly empty restaurant. The second they'd ordered, the demon had drug Erza off to the bathroom for whatever stupid woman reason and, honestly, he just wanted them to get back and soon. He and Jellal knew one another on a basic level and making conversation, like the demon had ordered, was not going according to plan. "Don't you normally travel with a whole barrage of other people?"

"Well, I did not invite them all out to dinner with Erza." He frowned over at the man. "I take it, then, that you know what we're doing here?"

For a moment, Laxus only stared at him before shrugging. "Honestly, Mira has this…thing. She's developed this idea that she's great at, uh, counseling people."

"I do not understand."

"It's, uh, you know, a couples thing."

That was one thing Laxus liked about Jellal. It didn't take hardly anything to make him squirm. Sitting up taller then as the other man blushed, Laxus grinned at him.

"I'm not sure her motives here though," he said mischievously. "Unless there's something-"

"Of course. Erza and I are…we're…not…"

"You're just in luck." Laxus was in his zone then. Making people uncomfortable was a favorite pastime of his. "The demon's other favorite thing to do is set people up. Hit a goldmine here. She'll get the two of you together, give you some counseling, and I'll get a happy little demon back at the apartment. Win-win."

"Erza and I are friends." Jellal wouldn't look at him then. "And I do not enjoy your insinuations of otherwise."

"C'mon." If the demon wanted therapy, Laxus was about to give Jellal a crash course. "You guys are great together."

"No." Jellal was glancing around then too, as if hoping the women would return. "We are not."

"You mean you and Erza never-"

"I am not enjoying this conversation."

Maybe Bickslow and Lisanna were onto something. Forcing the issue was great.

So long as he wasn't on the receiving end.

Heh. He kinda wished that the demon enjoyed that kinda stuff. As horrible as a couple as Bickslow and Lisanna were together (in his mind), at least they had fun doing the same, maddening things.

"It's obvious, anyhow," Laxus told him. "I mean, I don't even care about either of you-"

"I do not believe either of us has asked you to."

"-but even I can tell." He got another toothy sneer. "Not that I blame you. A lotta people are interested in Erza."

"Perhaps," the other man challenged, "you are pushing off your own feelings on me. Is that it? Is that what this is about?"

"Even you're not stupid enough to think that you'll outsmart me." Laxus snorted. "The demon versus Titania? Hmmm. Easy choice."

"I'm sorry that you made the wrong one."

That was it! That was why Laxus didn't like to play those games that Bickslow and Lisanna did. Because eventually, the tables got turned on him.

And if there was anything that Laxus hated it was being the butt of a joke.

Narrowing his eyes then, he said, "Coming from the guy that has apparently had neither, I'd shut your face."

"Touchy. Hmmm."

Great. Now the idiot was the one with the upper hand. Damn Mirajane for leaving him alone with the guy. Just giving him a chance to make a fool of himself. That was the exact reason he usually didn't talk to anyone and just listened to music.

Stupid demon. Getting him all involved and stuff. Did she not realize the problems she was causing?

Probably. She probably didn't even care. Would just say that it was a good thing. That she was helping to change him. Bleh. Bleh, demon. Bleh!

"Dragon, are you making friends?"

And she was back. Great.

"Something tells me that is unlikely," Erza remarked as she joined the table too, next to Jellal.

"I guess you're right," Mira said with a giggle. "Since you're both already friends."

"That is a stretch of a word," Jellal told her though Erza only shook her head, "but if you choose to think of it that way, then so be it."

Laxus only snorted, saying nothing. Mira saw this as a non factor though as she just clapped her hands together excitedly.

"I don't think we've ever done this before," she told them. "All gone out to eat together. It's so-"

"You say that, demon," Laxus grumbled, "every time we go out with another set of people."

"Because, Lax," she complained, glancing at him. "You've never wanted to go out on dates with other couples. Now that you're so willing though-"

"I'm not."

"Couples is a very strong word," Erza intervened. "And Mira, when I agreed to come, I told you it was merely because Jellal and I would have to eat anyhow. There is nothing that we require your assistance in."

"At all," he echoed.

"Of course you do," Mira insisted. "Everyone has something that they need to work passed. Even if you are just friends."

"We are," Erza insisted. "As I've explained to you many times."

"Friends do not get so happy to see one another," the other woman insisted. "You were beaming today."

"I still have no proof of this."

"My eyes are proof enough."

Jellal only sighed. "The fact is though that we so rarely get to see one another. Therefore, we do not have time for problems to sprout up between one another. You understand, yes? There's nothing for you to fix if we never are around one another for a problem to arise."

Erza was quick to nod. "That is right. We are most happy with one another."

"Yes." Jellal nodded as well. "There is nothing that Erza has done that would cause me any trouble."

"And I feel the same."

"Gah," Laxus groaned. "Please, just be together to save someone else from being with the two of you."

"Laxus," Mira hissed. "Behave."

"What? I'm serious. For two people that lead such exciting lives, you're so  _boring_  together. Seriously." He shook his head. "Or maybe you shouldn't be together then, if you bring out this side of one another."

Jellal glanced at Erza before saying, "Boring is not how I would describe things. Would you?"

"Of course not," she said before frowning over at Laxus. "Considering your new source of entertainment is counseling others, perhaps you should rethink what is boring and what is not."

"You think that I enjoy this sort of stuff?" He snorted. "You're not that stupid, are you, Erza?"

Mira frowned. "But you do enjoy this, dragon."

"Yeah, yeah, sure. But Erza, you're not stupid enough to believe that."

Jellal snickered. "You openly call the demon Mirajane stupid to her face?"

"When did he say that?" Mira frowned before glancing at Laxus. "Did you call me stupid?"

"What? No." Sorta. "Who are you gonna believe, Mira? Me? Or the wanted fugitive?"

"Don't put me on the spot, Lax."

"What?"

Jellal only sighed. "Erza, I am only in town for a few hours. Are you certain that you wish to spend them doing…this?"

"I promised Mira that we would."

"Why would you do that?"

"I do not know. She sounded so concerned and kept insisting that Laxus has been in a bad mood these past few days without having someone to counsel. I just figured that you and I-"

"What?" Laxus frowned at Mira. "Don't pin this on me. I hate this!"

"You're so cute when you deny your inner feelings, dragon."

"Mira, seriously, I just do this for you. I-"

"So cute."

She was killing him. The woman was literally killing him. And not slowly either. She was going straight for the jugulars every single day. He wouldn't last much longer.

"But," Mira went on, grinning across the table at them. "This isn't about me and Laxus or why we did this. Because we're already doing this. Clearly, Erza, you were subconsciously agreeing to this because there's something that you want worked out. So what is it?"

The other woman just stared at her. "You yourself said that I seem happier today that I usually am. Clearly, there's nothing. Is there something that you wish to discuss, Jellal?"

"Besides the fact I am extremely uncomfortable right now? Nothing."

"See?" Erza even smiled. "Perhaps you took a wrong turn with us, Mirajane. Surely there is someone else that you can help."

"You're one of the last couples though," she complained.

"Again," Jellal intervened. "Couples is a strong word."

"Extremely," Erza agreed.

"But," Mira started, clearly pausing just so she could think of something. "Don't you guys miss one another?"

"Hmmm?" Jellal frowned. "When would we have the chance to do that?"

"While you're gone," the demon reasoned. "I mean, I miss Laxus when he goes away. Especially on long jobs. And that's only a month or two, at most."

"It takes you months to complete jobs?" the other man asked. "Seems like an awful long amount of time for someone of your caliber."

"What are you saying?" Laxus grumbled. "'cause if it don't gotta do with the demon counseling you, I don't wanna hear it."

"There would be no reason for the two of us to miss one another," Erza said then. "Mirajane. We are both very content in seeing one another sparsely."

"It is much more enjoyable," Jellal agreed. "Like a…surprise."

"A surprise?"

"Yes." He nodded. "It's rather refreshing."

"Not to mention," Erza began though Laxus had a bad feeling she was going to mention, "we do not have the best of track record when together."

"I take full blame," Jellal said as Mira just stared at them. "Our friendship is almost like a shaky truce. It is better if we are not around one another very often. Less chance for me to screw something up, as it were."

"See?" Laxus gestured to them. "They're talking about him enslaving people and trying to take over the world and I'm still bored. So bored. Never been more bored."

Mira only mumbled, "Behave," under her breath to keep him tame before saying slowly to Erza and Jellal, "Does that mean that you just don't…need my help?'

"Of course." Erza was quick to nod. "It also means that your perfect record is still very much so intact. There was no problem here."

"We thank you for your concern though," Jellal added. "Erza and I though are just friends. Friends with very little contact with one another. Who like it that way. It is not just for the best, but also preferable for us."

"Very," Erza agreed.

"Still bored."

Completely ignoring Laxus that time, Mira just said slowly, "I guess, if you two really don't think that you have anything you want to talk about-"

"We would much rather listen to more of Laxus' description of where he disappears to for months at a time." Jellal smiled at the other man. Damn him. "I'm sure you have some delightful tales."

Narrowing his eyes at the other man, Laxus said, "I've always wondered who would win, me and you, no holds barred. I mean, I know, but-"

"How courageous of you then, to challenge me knowing you will come out a failure."

"Behave, Laxus," Mira chided though Erza only smiled at Jellal. He hated the look they were sharing too.

They were playing them. Just like Bickslow and Lisanna. They were getting a kick out of messing with him and Mirajane. He was starting to think that everyone had been playing them from the beginning.

Could he trust no one? Was nothing sacred? Since when were you allowed to secretly mock the man buying your dinner?

Oh shit. He forgot. He still had to pay for dinner.

Damn the demon. And she hadn't even gotten anything she wanted out of the whole thing. That meant, obviously, that the whole thing was a waste. A complete and utter waste.

When the food came though, some of the focus shifted from Laxus as Mira took instead to asking Jellal about what he'd been doing recently. And though there was a lot that he didn't seem to wish to tell, he did keep her entertained. Sigh.

His demon was crazy.

But his. And that was all that mattered.

"Ooh, Laxus," Mira tried when they were done. "Dessert-"

"No."

"Dragon-"

"I just paid for the three of you," Laxus grumbled. "What more do you want from me, woman?"

"Clearly," Jellal told him, "dessert."

Growling, Laxus looked over the bill on the table before pulling out some jewels and tossing them down on the table. "Come on, demon. Maybe I'll buy you ice cream or something on the way home."

"On the way to the guild, you mean."

"What?"

"I have to get back to work, Lax. I told you-"

"You're killing me, woman."

After they left, Erza, of course, with the thought of dessert on her mind, ordered some for herself before moving to sit on the other side of the table, so that she and Jellal could face one another.

"That," he told her as she only grinned, "was horrible."

"It wasn't  _horrible_ ," she complained. "Just not enjoyable."

"I'll agree," he caved. "Though I'm still unsure why you chose to waste our very limited time together with them-"

"How often are we able to openly go out to eat with one another without having to avoid my guild members?" she asked with a grin.

"Hiding in plain sight, I suppose," he agreed. "Now that you've convinced Mirajane that there is no chance we are-"

"It worked all too well," she said with a nod. "Though I had no intentions of actually having dinner with them, knowing the outcome now, I'm glad she was so insistent this afternoon."

"Tell me," he said as he picked up his glass of water to take a sip. "Were you honestly that excited to see me? That you were, what did she say? Beaming?"

"Mirajane has quite the problem with over exaggeration."

"Unfortunately," he said. "Though you do seem a tad happier than usual to me right now-"

"Hardly."

"And tell me, Erza," he said with his own smile. "Do you think the dormitory can spare you for the night?"

"Just for the night."

"Perfect," he said as the waitress appeared with a slice of cake. "That is all the time I can find to get away as well."

When the plate was sat down, it was in the center of the table, between the two of them. Jellal immediately moved to stab it with a fork, but came up with only air.

"What do you think you are doing?" Erza pulled the plate over to her. "Jellal?"

"We're sharing a piece of-"

"No," she told him as she herself took a stab at it. "We are not."

The man just smiled though, settling back in his chair. Even when she was being selfish, Erza still amazed him.

"You know," he said as she devoured the cake, leaving him to only watch. "We could always try just telling your friends that we have been seeing one another and stop the charade of-"

"If you think that it is that simple," she told him with hardly a glance, "then you do not know Fairy Tail."

Considering just from the thought that the two of them  _might_  be dating, Mira had drug them out to dinner with her clearly standoffish boyfriend (Jellal didn't remember him being that rude during the Grand Magic Games), perhaps Erza was on to something.

"Believe me," she insisted. "If you don't have problems in a relationship before they all find out about it, you will after."

 


	9. Chapter 9

  


It was very rare, honestly, that Laxus' schemes, while quite devious, had such pure intentions. Sure, part of the reason that he ever started counseling people with Mirajane was because she made him and because, well, he liked boning her and that didn't happen if she wasn't happy, but it was also because he cared about his little demon. He really did. He loved the fool, craziness and all. She was his number one. His heart.

So he cheated the system a little. Made some backdoor deals. Kept some secrets. Played the game and played it well. All for her happiness. Really. Honestly. He just cared that much about her.

Still though, devious and underhanded things always come into the light eventually. Laxus just didn't think that his would be drug there by his most faithful follower of all.

"You wanna what?"

Freed just stood there in front of the table, nodding his head at the surprised Laxus and already giddy from the thought Mirajane.

"I wish for you two to help me with my recent relationship," the man said. "I have not had many…relationships, as I have been waiting for-"

"Freed, I'm honored, but waiting on me isn't-"

"-the perfect person," the letter mage finished. "I am not one to just jump into relationships."

Laxus frowned. Just from that one statement he knew that something was fishy. Freed? Dating? And not mentioning that he was in love with his idol? No freakin' way.

Mirajane though was downright ecstatic, clapping her hands in her joy, almost falling out of her chair while she was at it.

"Oh, Freed! I can't believe that you've finally started dating," she said. "Is it serious?"

"I hope for it to be," the man said, bowing his head. "It is rather early on, as you well assume, but I can see a future for us."

"Then what are we supposed to do?" Laxus grumbled with a frown. In the past few days since Jellal had disappeared back out of town, he'd managed to keep the demon from finding anyone else for them to counsel. They still had Gray and Juvia, who she was working diligently on getting together (it was harder than one would think), but that was turning out to be a slow build. This Freed thing was so sudden though and, well, interesting. To her, anyhow. "I mean, what can we possibly do for you if you've only just started dating? Surely you don't have problems already, do you?"

Huh. Freed hadn't thought that far. "Uh-"

"Laxus," Mirajane complained. "Clearly, Freed is taking proactive measures."

The slayer only blinked. "Proactive, huh?"

Nodding, she said, "He clearly doesn't  _want_  problems to appear, so he's going to have us go out on a double date with them and divert any problems that pop up. Duh."

"No, Mirajane," he told her. "No duh."

"Huh?"

"We are not taking someone out to eat again," Laxus complained. "I mean-"

"You said," Freed challenged (he was rare to do such a thing to Laxus, but the time called for it), "that I could come out with the two of you if I had someone to go with. I have someone to go with now. You can't change the rules."

"Yeah, Lax," Mira agreed with a nod. "You can't change the rules."

He just glared at her before looking to Freed. "Alright. Fine. The demon's break's almost over though, so scram, huh?"

"O-Of course, Laxus," he said, glancing around. "Bickslow and Ever are waiting for me for a training session anyhow."

As he headed off, Laxus just snorted before moving to take a sip of his beer.

"Wow," Mira whispered. "Who would have thought it? Huh? Freed, with someone other than you?"

"Yeah, that was never happening to begin with," Laxus told her with a frown. "Although-"

"Hmmm?"

"It's just… This guy better be fucking hot if Freed thinks he's better than me." Laxus didn't know why it annoyed him that there was a chance of that, but it did. "I mean, can you think of a single guy that's better looking than me, Mira? Huh? Can you?"

"I don't get it. Do you want an answer or-"

"Mira."

"What?" She was still grinning at him. "Do you want Freed to want you? Is that it? Does it stroke your ego or something?"

"Don't use stroke and me and Freed in the same sentence."

"Laxus."

He just looked off. "I'm just interested in seeing this guy. That's all."

"Hmmm." Mirajane gave her boyfriend a once over.

"What was that?"

"Hmmm?"

"You know what. Why did you just-"

"I was just looking."

"At what?"

"All the improvements I could make," she said, nodding at him. "To you."

"What?"

"I mean, Lax, for Freed to be serious enough about someone to tell us about him, clearly he's a great guy," she said. "Which means that he's better than you. I'm just thinking of what that would be like."

"I am perfection in human form, woman," he grumbled. "If anything, Freed just came to realize he couldn't get the best and decided to choose the next best thing."

"Mmmm…no. I bet the guy is  _so_  smoking." She giggled. "Maybe I'll be the one jealous of Freed for a change."

"What?" Laxus growled. "Demon-"

"I bet he has rippling muscles."

"I'm built, woman, like a god. How many gods do you see with more muscles than me? What? You want me to be like your brother? With all those nasty, useless extra muscles? No. No! I'm fine how I am."

"And dark, long locks," Mirajane went on, closing her eyes slightly. "With just a killer smile-"

"I don't like this conversation." At all. "So-"

"I bet he wears those really tight shirts. You know the ones." Even when she opened her eyes, it wasn't to glance at him. Just stare up at the ceiling, as if lost in her own thoughts. "Show off all his muscles. Mmmm. And I bet he has dark, dark brown eyes that just-"

"Why," Laxus growled, "is your perfect man literally nothing like me?"

"This isn't  _my_ perfect man, Lax," she told him with a glance. "I'm just trying to figure out what Freed would go for. That's all."

"Right. Because I'm your perfect man."

"Uh…yeah, okay."

"But I'm also Freed's. So-"

"Clearly, not."

"For the last time, Mirajane, he's just picking someone else because I'm just so unavailable and we're never going to happen so-"

"Hmmm." Mirajane shut her eyes again. "I bet he's a top. Or, ooh, power bottom."

"God, you're killing me! Shut up!"

"He probably surprises Freed with tons of gifts," she went on. "And carries her places. All around."

"You said her. Again, you're just talking about yourself."

"I said him."

"You did not," he grumbled. "And Freed's a grown man. Another guy wouldn't carry him around."

"They would if they were in love. I bet he does. I'll ask."

"Why? To add to your stupid fantasies about some other guy that isn't me? And I could carry you, you know." He was glaring. "And I am definitely a top. Have something inside my… No! So don't fantasize otherwise."

Lisanna, who had been walking over to the table to tell Mira her break was over, only turned on her heel. Either Mira and Laxus were having a bad day or she had just completely misinterpreted a conversation.

"I wasn't even talking about you, silly."

"No, you're talking about your perfect guy. Why would you perfect guy be gay, Mira? Huh?"

"He wouldn't," she said. "But in Freed's case, he'd have to be."

"Ha! So you are describing both you and Freed's perfect-"

"Yes, Laxus," she sighed, giving in. There was no point in fighting it. "It's just that Freed and I have similar tastes."

"No," he growled. "Freed likes godlike creatures with blonde hair and amazing personalities."

"…I don't get it. Is that supposed to be you?"

"But you, on the other hand, Mirajane, apparently like dark headed, long haired, overly built men who carry you around and waste jewels on buying you things."

"…Yeah, pretty much."

Growling loudly that time, he shoved away from the table. "This is stupid. I have better things to do than talk to you about imaginary guys that probably wouldn't even treat you right! Not like I do. I'm the best guy for the job, Mira. That's how come I have it!"

She only rolled her eyes as he stomped off. "Remember to pick a day for the date with Freed. Set it up and then get back to me, alright?"

"Yeah, yeah."

* * *

"This has to be the nicest place we've gone in awhile," Mirajane mentioned to Laxus after they were seated. "Wow."

"Well," he grumbled slightly, "you said that you wanted someone who gave you things, huh? Here you go. A real fancy dinner."

"Laxus, are we still on that?"

Yes. And they had been for the past three days. Apparently, her little dragon did not take well to her envisioning another man. Go figure.

"I'm just saying that you wanted to come here. So we're here." He glanced over the menu. "Besides, this is the first time that we're meeting Freed's new friend. I-"

"Oh, I get it."

"Get what?"

She grinned. "You're tyring to show off, right? To this other man?" She put a hand to her mouth. "Ooh, it's so cute! You're jealous and this has made you realize it and now you and Freed are going to be together for-"

"Uh, demon?"

"Hmmm?"

"You do know that I'm with you, right? I mean, not to burst your bubble-"

"Oh." Mira dropped her hand, blushing slightly. "I just got a little…over excited, I suppose. I love a good romance plot."

"That's not a very good one though."

"You're just saying that because you-"

"No. I'm saying it's overused."

"It's overused because it's real. Something like that could really happen. It does happen."

"Yeah, well," Laxus grumbled, glancing over at her. "It ain't here. I have no desire to get with Freed. He can be with whoever he wants. Not my problem. Never gonna be my problem."

"If you say so."

"I do." And his tone was absolute. "I just think that Freed gets the short end of the stick."

"What do you mean?"

Shrugging, Laxus said, "Bickslow and Lisanna preoccupy most of our time. They're so needy and whiny and just annoying. Then Ever and Elfman are fighting constantly, so we have to put up with that. Poor Freed just gets overlooked and… Why does it sound like I'm talking about my children?"

Mirajane only sighed, looking off. "I hope that Freed really likes this guy."

"What difference would it make to you?"

"Think about it, Lax. We don't have anyone to go out on dates with," she said. "You don't like Ever with Elfman-"

"I liked it. When I was able to tease her about it. Now she's actually with him and that's just not fun for anyone. Even her. And him."

"-you hate spending time with Bickslow and Lisanna-"

"I don't hate spending time with Bickslow. And I don't hate spending time with Lisanna. I just hate when they're together and all over one another and-"

"-and you know that I like Lucy, but for some reason, you won't just admit that you think Natsu's great and let us go out with the two of them-"

"Uh, because he's not great and I don't like him and it's rude of you to try and make me-"

"-so," Mira went on in conclusion, "this is our last chance at having a couple that we can do things with. I want it to work out. Don't you?"

"I don't know." He shrugged. "I like it better when we go out alone."

"I don't."

Laxus only frowned. "You know, woman, recently you've really been getting on my nerves."

"Oh, whatever, Laxus. Why can't I like to be around other people sometimes?"

"You can, demon. You do it constantly and never just want to go out with me anymore, but-"

"We just went out the other… What difference does it make?"

He only shook his head. "Never mind. We're here and that's all the matters. Now we just have to wait on Freed and get this over with. Maybe you can even hook up with the guy he brings. You know, so he can be with you and then Freed can be with him and in a roundabout way he's then been with me. Oh, and you got to be with your dream guy."

"Don't be like that, Laxus."

"Like what? Huh?" He was glaring hard down at the menu then, but none of the words were making sense. "Since your perfect man is just-"

"And I'm your perfect woman, Lax? Really?"

"Yes, really."

"Bull."

"Mira-"

"We're not doing this here." She glanced around then, remembering their surroundings. "And look. Here's Freed."

Laxus didn't glance over at the front of the restaurant to look for his faithful friend. He was still too upset. He also didn't glance at his demon. If he had, he might have noticed the annoyed look leaving her face and being replaced by one of shock. No, Laxus was left to be blindsided when they were joined at the table by, of course, the green haired mage as well as his date.

Which, for some reason, was not a dark headed, long haired man who wore tight shirts and was ripped beyond belief. Instead it was a petite, redheaded woman who, personally, Laxus usually wouldn't give a second glance, but being escorted over to the table by Freed more than gave him a reason to give her a few glances.

"Sorry we are late," Freed said as he pulled out a chair for his lady friend, right next to Mirajane, before moving to sit on the other side of the table with Laxus. "I did not-"

"Freed," Mira said slowly as Laxus just stared. "Who's your friend?"

He didn't realize that Mirajane was more inquisitive as to why the woman was there and instead saw it as an oversight on his part.

"Silly me." He grinned as he took a seat. "Laxus, Mirajane, this is the woman I've been seeing. Alida, this is my friend, Mirajane, and, of course, this is Laxus."

The demon and dragon were no longer fighting then. Only staring at one another.

"Hi," Alida greeted with a grin. "It's so nice to finally meet you both. Freed told me  _so_  much about you. Especially you, Laxus."

"Well," the man said slowly as Mira only stared. "I wish that he'd told us a tad more about you. And his tastes."

"Uh, what?"

"Laxus." Mirajane gave him a look for that. "Hush."

"Laxus is merely referring to the fact that you are clearly not a mage," Freed told her. "He no doubt senses your lack of magical ability and it has shocked him. I am very into magic, after all, but Laxus-"

"No," the slayer told him with a shake of his head. "That is not what I-"

"That's what he meant," Mira said with a nod. "Yes."

Freed only glanced at Laxus. "I was surprised too, but we both just get along so well."

"That's right," Alida was quick to quip. "We just hit it off. Right from the start."

"Um," Mirajane slowly tried. Clearly, the woman didn't know that she was there for a counseling session, so Mira would have to ease on in there. You know, after her shock died down. "Where did you two meet?"

"Meet?" Alida looked to Freed. "Um-"

"It's very simple," the man said. "We, uh, you know, um, just met. At a park."

"A park?" Mira asked. "Here in Magnolia?"

"Yeah!" Alida nodded her head then. "I was, um, you know. At the park."

"Obviously," Laxus grumbled.

"And Freak was there too-"

"Wait, did you just call him-"

"It is a nickname," Freed was quick to tell Mirajane. "That she has for me. Freak. It's very…personal."

"Yeah, well, I don't want to hear about that one," Laxus grunted. Freak? As a nickname? Between a couple? One of whom Laxus was sure up until a few minutes ago was into men? No way. No need for an explanation at all. "Please."

"Anyhow," Freed took over the story. "We were both at the park and saw one another and it was just attraction at first sight."

"Really?" Laxus asked. "Just first sight? No confusion? Or revelations on your part? Or-"

"Dragon." Mira was still glaring at him. "Honestly."

Humming, Freed said, "It was quite the day."

"Why's this the first that I'm hearing about it?" Laxus asked. "Huh? I mean, this seems to be a rather big deal in your life."

"And I'm confused on the timeline," Mirajane said.

"Huh?"

"When Laxus and I were going out with Erza a few days ago," she went on. "You didn't have anyone to go with. But now you say that you've been seeing this woman for-"

"I was not sure how the two of you would react," Freed covered easily. "That is all."

"React?" Laxus snorted. "How else could we have reacted? Like what? You thought that we would tell you that you couldn't date someone? We're not, like, your masters or anything."

"O-Of course, Laxus," the other man said, bowing his head slightly. "I would never think otherwise. It was just that I did not wish to trouble the two of you with-"

"Why would it trouble us?" Mira asked. "We're happy for you."

Snort. "It's a little early to say that, demon. So far we know that she's very pretty-"

"Thank you," Alida said, though honestly, Laxus was just saying that to keep the demon from saying he was being rude. The woman was alright, definitely on par with Freed, but not nearly up to Laxus' standards. By which he meant she was no Mirajane. Then again, no one was. But Mirajane. So…

"-that she calls you a freak," Laxus continued. "And that against all common knowledge on everything I know about you, you're not actually gay."

That one kinda just fell in there to a stunned table. Then Mirajane took to glaring again. He wasn't sure if she ever stopped.

"Laxus Dreyar-"

"What? It's something that I want to talk about. I mean, honestly, Freed, are you just interested in both men and women? Or something? Because I swear-"

"This is a rather awkward place to discuss such a thing." The letter mage looked off. "Honestly, why are you-"

"Laxus," Mira hissed. "Do we need to have a word in private?"

"No," he grumbled. "I just-"

"Uh," Alida tried then, glancing around the table. "Maybe we could get back to the story of how we met? Or, um…did you say that we were being counseled here or something, Freed?"

"Oh." Mirajane turned her attention on the woman then. "You know about that?"

"I told her that that was the main goal of this encounter," Freed said, though his face was still bright red. "Although I did not think you would be discussing such a topic."

Laxus just grunted. "I get to the heart of problems, in case you haven't notice."

"Oh, no, I have."

"I can guarantee you, if you'd like," Alida said with a big grin. Laxus had to hand it to the woman, she had a nice smile. "Freed is very much into women."

"Do we honestly have to talk about this?" Apparently, counseling with Mirajane and Laxus was not all Freed had thought it would be. "Let's speak on something else, yes?"

That elicited another snort from the slayer. "Fine. What sorta problems have the two of you been having then?"

"Problems is a strong word," Freed told them both. "More…disagreements, I would say. Right? Alida?"

The redhead was quick to nod. "And they're such silly, little things, you know. Like, err, uh…Freed?"

"We have trouble deciding on where to eat," he said. "Or go on dates. Every single time. We just have such different tastes."

"I don't understand how that's a problem," Mira said.

"Huh?"

Laxus nodded. "You just go where the woman wants and shut the hell up about it, Freed. I mean, come on, you think I like half the things that I do with Mirajane? No. But I put up with them and she puts out. That's how it works."

The demon's gaze was smoldering then. "You know, Lax, if you're so unhappy-"

"I have not said that I'm unhappy."

"You might as well! All you've done for the past few days is whine about some made up guy-"

"Your perfect made up guy."

"He wasn't mine! He was for Freed. Freed's perfect made up guy-"

"Why," the letter mage groan, "are you two so insistent on this? Honestly? Just because I do not pay attention to most women does not-"

"Dude, you literally have told me before that you're into me," Laxus grumbled, though he was still glaring over at his girlfriend. "I mean-"

"Yes, Laxus, I am…attracted to you."

"Well, don't blush when you say it." More grumbles. "Fucking weird. Just say it normal."

"How do you normally say something like that?" Alida asked slowly as Mirajane huffed.

"Laxus," she hissed. "You're ruining everything. Again. You always do this. I try to have a nice time out-"

"Nice time out?" Freed was rubbing at his eyes then, as if to wake himself up form a nightmare. He'd always envisioned going out with Laxus and Mirajane as a pleasant experience. One to relive for years. It was turning out to be pretty horrible. And the waiter hadn't even come over to the table yet! "When does that start exactly?"

"You described your perfect man as someone that looks nothing like me," Laxus hissed. "I'm not going to just get over that."

"Yeah, because you're a big baby."

"Oh, I'm a baby."

"That's what I said."

"Coming from the woman who cries every time someone doesn't get along with her? Or like her? And forbid that someone doesn't think you're good at this stupid match maker shit or counseling bull that you've been pumping. Then you mope and pout and-"

"Shut up, Laxus."

"No, Mira. I'm not going to. You-"

"Really, Laxus? We're going to fight because I said that some other, made up mind you, guy would be attractive? Like you don't think other women are attractive?"

"What sort of man did you pick out for me?" Freed asked then, frowning. "If he did not look like Laxus? Just out of curiosity, of course, I-"

Glancing at him, Mira said, "Well, I was just-"

"It doesn't matter," Laxus hissed. "Mirajane wasn't thinking about you. She was thinking about herself. Just admit it, Mira."

"What, Laxus? That I'm not only attracted to you? Really? Is that what we're talking about right now?"

"I don't care about who you're attracted to. What I care about is that you described the best person for you and it wasn't like me. At all."

"I couldn't imagine a man more attractive than you," Freed offered. "Laxus."

That got another grumble. "You can't hit on me in front of your lady friend, Freed. That's weird. Knock it off."

"I was just-"

"I think," Mirajane said, glancing at Alida who was mostly just staring at Freed, too stunned for words. "That this was a mistake. Clearly, Laxus doesn't want to focus on anyone other than himself today, so-"

"Oh, right, okay, Mira. I'm the one at fault here."

"You are!"

"Like you wouldn't care if I told you what my perfect woman-"

"I wouldn't. At all."

"Perhaps we could get back to me and my date?" Freed tried. "Yes?"

"Alright," Laxus said. "Assuming you and Freed work out, Alida, would you ever tell him about how you would much rather be with some toned, hot, long haired loser instead of him when he's clearly a god in the flesh?"

"Uh" Alida glanced at Freed. "Yes? No? I don't-"

"And that's not even mentioning the tight shirts."

"Laxus, shut up," Mira told him. "Honestly. Do you just try to ruin everything?"

"Try to- Are you serious? Woman, I'm the reason that we've even had these stupid counseling sessions!"

"What are you talking about? You've resisted constantly," she said. "It's getting harder and harder to pretend like I don't notice, Lax, and just act like you enjoy it. I really don't appreciate it either."

He frowned. "Wait, so you know that I don't like-"

"Of course I do."

"Then why do you always tell people that I-"

"The same reason that I tell them that you like taking me places or doing things with me," she said.

"Which would be?"

"Because, Laxus, I hope that if you see how much I would like for you to be that way, you would try being it sometimes. But you continue to-"

"Why should I suddenly like something that I clearly don't, Mira, just because you want me to? Shouldn't you just, I dunno, like me? For the things that I like? And respect them? Like I do you?"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"What do you think it means? There're things about you that I don't like."

"Like what?"

"Na-ah, demon." Laxus even shook his head. "I'm not as big an idiot as you think. You ain't gonna get me to say anything close to that."

"Laxus-"

"Surely," Freed said, glancing around, "a waiter should have been along by now. Surely."

As if that would save them.

"If you don't like doing things with me, Laxus-"

"I didn't say that, Mirajane."

"Then what are you saying?"

"Just… You're a lot to deal with, alright? And I'm tired, okay? Of constantly having to be the one to give things up."

"I give things up too."

"Oh, right, yeah. Dark haired men with tight shirts that like to carry you around. I'm so sorry."

"You're being rude."

"And you're being inconsiderate."

"What do you want, Laxus? For me to tell you that you're the best man in the world and that everyone else is jealous of you?"

"Well…it would be nice."

"Oh, Laxus."

"It would."

"And you are," Freed agreed readily. "Honestly, you-"

"Not helping," the man grumbled.

"I was just-"

"Not helping!" Looking to Mira once more, he said, "You just don't appreciate me and all I do-"

"You've yet to name anything, but-"

"I do plenty! I'm not on trial here."

"And I am?"

"Yeah, Mira. You don't think that I'm the best guy to be with you. So what happens when the best guy shows up? Huh? You just going to throw me to the side?"

"Laxus, it was just some stupid wishful thinking," she told him with a glare. "Like you don't think about other woman?"

Now, usually, Laxus would have dropped the whole thing by then. The demon could only argue for so long with him before she broke off in tears and, well, the dragon just couldn't watch his woman cry. It was impossible. But a lot of things were factoring in then. Freed was being weird, thoughts of Mira having fantasies about other guys (and also possibly him with other guys, which was also weird) were swirling in his head, and, not to mention, he was stuck on  _another stupid therapy session for no apparent reason_. The list went on. So, that's why Laxus just went off the cuff with his next statement.

"Oh yeah, Mira," he hissed. "I think about tons of women."

"Great. Then-"

"I think about Cana and that nice little top she wears. And your stupid blonde friend, Lucy. I really like thinking about-"

"Laxus!"

Freed started taking a headcount then of the people in the restaurant. According to his calculations, they were about to have a high casualty count. Because there was no way that Satan Soul wasn't going to rip apart every person in that building in her rage. No way.

That was probably the most astonishing fact of the night though. Mirajane didn't have a meltdown. She didn't even looked distressed. Only stared at her boyfriend for a moment, though he refused to meet her eyes, before speaking.

"If you're so miserable, Laxus," Mirajane said as she got to her feet, "then let's not do it anymore. Good?"

" _Great_."

After Mirajane left, they all just kinda sat there for a moment. Then, slowly, Freed looked to Laxus.

"When she said that you weren't going to do it anymore," he asked slowly, "did she mean the therapy stuff? Or-"

"Well, duh. What else could she have meant?"

"I thought that perhaps she meant your relationship in general."

"What?"

Freed shrugged. "That's what it sounded like."

"That's what I thought too," Alida offered, making Laxus frown over at her.

"I'm surprised you're still here," he said. "I mean-"

"Oh, I'm waiting to get paid."

"Paid?"

Freed just rolled his eyes. "You did understand the point of this, yes? Saying in front of him that you are being paid-"

"The point was to fool that ditzy woman that you went on and on about, right?" Alida was giving him a look then as Laxus just frowned. "That was Mirajane? She seemed convinced."

"I can't deal with this," Laxus said, putting a hand to his head. "Freed-"

"W-Well, it is quite simple," the man said. "Mirajane has been on this couples kick and you have only furthered it by insisting that if I wished to go out with the two of you, then I must have a date. So…I got a date."

"You paid a woman to go out with you? Freed, seriously, you really didn't need-"

"I needed a woman to say that we had been dating and were having problems so that the man I admire most in the world will go out with us, with his girlfriend, and see how much better the two of us are together and leave her. But I will have brought her a new friend and they will bond over…whatever frivolous things Mirajane likes and things will be fine," he insisted. "That is not so easy to explain to just a random woman on the streets. Believe me, I tried."

"…Are you and the demon just shitting me?"

"What do you mean?"

"Mira said the exact same- Well, I mean, I think she was hoping you'd bring a hot guy and she'd end up with him and that you and me would get together-"

"That crossed my mind too," Freed admitted. "But men were even harder to convince of this plot."

"Not to be a bother," Alida interrupted, "but are one of you still buying me dinner or-"

"I don't even…" Laxus hung his head then. "Freed?"

"Yes, Laxus?"

"How certain are you that she wasn't just talking about the therapy thing?"

"W-Well, I was just reading the conversation, but I thought it was pretty obvious. And then you agreed, so- Oh! Laxus! You're a single man again. This calls for a round of beers."

"Don't make me kill you." He moved to get to his feet then. "I gotta think. And maybe go talk to Mira. This…was horrible. And don't pay people to go out with you anymore, Freed."

"Of course, Laxus. Sorry."

"And…just for the record…are you…"

"Going to pay for my dinner?" Alida was not giving up on that. At all. "Or paying me soon?"

Just shaking his head then, Laxus headed off, leaving the restaurant before he even got something to eat. Not that he was that hungry then. Really, he just wanted to go talk to Mirajane. After thinking. And deciding. On some stuff. Like how mad he was. And how mad she was.

And he was just realizing that he'd told her that he had thought about sleeping with two of her closest friends. Which, considering he had made passes at both of them before they got together in front of her, should have been obvious to the demon. He knew it wouldn't be though and now he'd only dug his grave deeper. The only question was if Mirajane had already started filling it in or not. Because if she had, well, there was a good chance he wouldn't be able to climb back out.

"They were nice," Alida told Freed once it was just them at the table. The waiter had finally come around and taken their order and, realizing that not only was he going to have to pay the woman for the date, but also dinner, (and for a failed endeavor too), only groaned. "I mean, other than the fact that they were fighting, they seemed pretty alright. And good choice. That Laxus guy is hot."

"Yes," Freed sighed. "I am aware."

"He looks pretty hung up on that woman though."

"Also aware."

"If I were you," she suggested then, "I would go get him while they're in limbo. He's going to need someone's shoulder to cry on. Why not yours? I mean-"

"Please," Freed requested as he frowned down at his drink, some sort of guilt pooling in his stomach for some reason. Was he the reason that Mirajane and Laxus were fighting? He wasn't sure. Hadn't that been his goal though? From the start? Why was he feeling so horrible then? "Stop talking about it."

"Whatever you want," she said, picking up her water glass. "You're the one paying for the night. We can spend it however you'd like."

Unless she had access to a time machine he could use to go back and not bring misery upon his idol and, probably, the closest friend he had outside of the Thunder Legion, then no, they couldn't.

Why was it Lisanna and Bickslow got to have fun tricking Mira and Laxus and Freed only got screwed in the end? Huh?

 


	10. Chapter 10

  


Considering the guild had survived years without Mirajane and Laxus being together, one would think that their breakup would, at the very least, not affect it at all. If not put everything back in its correct order. Laxus could go back to being a brooding, yet protective watchman of the guild and Mirajane could be the extremely available, yet equally unattainable barmaid that got in everyone's business.

Things, essentially, should have been back to normal. Instead, things seemed to just become awkward.

"I don't know," Levy sighed as she and Gajeel sat with one another in the hall. Lily was there, standing on the table, listening as well. "I just feel bad."

"Why?" the slayer in question grumbled. "What does the two of them have to do with the two of us?"

"A lot," the woman reasoned. "I mean, they're kind of the whole reason we're…that we're…"

That got a snort from the man before he moved to sling back some of the ale sitting in front of him. The second he did his face grew dark.

"Damn it," he growled. "This is the wrong type of beer."

Levy made a face at him. "Does it really matter? Isn't it all just the same?"

"No, shrimp," he grumbled as he glanced around for Lisanna. "It ain't. And why is Mira's damn sister workin' anyhow? She never gets anything right."

"Be nice," Levy said, giving him a look. "She's super busy and Kinana is sick and-"

"And this is why Mira should be-"

"You know that her and Laxus have things all mapped out," Lily said with a nod of his head. "She works in the morning and in the night. He gets the hall during the afternoon."

At that, Levy shook her head. "They can't honestly think that that will work for a prolonged period of time, can they?"

Gajeel just took to staring at his cat. "So what then, Lily? You keepin' up with relationships now?"

"Huh? No! Of course not." He crossed his arm and looked off. "I just have a hard time ignoring it when it is spoke of in my prescience. That is all."

"Who speaks of it?" Levy was grinning at him then as Gajeel only gave him a hard stare. "Pantherlily?"

"Yeah, cat, who? Who just forces you to listen to-"

"You are right now," he pointed out, still refusing to look at them. "And…and Happy! He does constantly."

"Happy does what constantly?"

Suddenly, they found the core members of Team Natsu standing before their table. It was Natsu who spoke, even glancing at his Exceed friend as if questioning him as well.

"Nothing," Levy was quick to say as the blue cat only frowned, knowing just from Pantherlily's tone that whatever they were saying about him hadn't been good. "We were just talking about…well, about Mira and Laxus."

"Oh." Happy's frown faded. "Yeah, I talk about that a lot."

Natsu only frowned as Lucy moved to take a seat on the other side of the table. "What are you guys doing?"

"I'm just along for the ride," Happy explain as he stayed resting on Lucy's head. "She's the one that sat down."

"We're supposed to be picking a job," he complained. "Lucy-"

"Go pick one, Natsu," she said with a slight shrug. "Come show it to us when you find one you like, huh?"

He didn't wanna do it alone (then they'd critique whatever he chose the whole time they were out doing the job), but neither of them were passing up talking about that with Levy, so he was on his own.

"It really is kinda sad, huh?" Lucy said after he walked off. "That they-"

"I didn't really want to talk about this," Gajeel grumbled. "I just wanted Lisanna to bring me the drink that I ordered. That's all."

"Gajeel, shush," Levy said, not even glancing at him. He glared at her words, but she only continued to stare at her blonde friend. "It is sad, huh? I mean, I never really…liked Laxus and Mirajane together."

"Not at all."

"I always picture her with…literally anyone else."

"Yeah and I think that he belongs with someone a lot more…rugged or something. Just not Mirajane."

"Right?" Levy nodded. "I've always thought that."

"Now that they're broken up though," Lucy said slowly, "I just…kinda think it's sad. Laxus is super bummed about it, Lisanna said. And Mira too."

"I know, Lucy," Happy suggested as he bounced off her head to land on the table with Pantherlily. "You should date Laxus to make it up to him."

"Shut up, cat."

"What?" He cocked his head. "I owe Laxus my date with Carla. So if he wants, I would gladly give him you."

"You don't have me to give away," she pointed out. "And I don't think that Laxus would really want me anyways."

"Don't get down on yourself," Levy said. "I bet he would totally take you."

"Is this really what you all talk about when I'm not around?" Gajeel complained. "Honestly?"

"Laxus wants Mira," Lucy insisted with a frown. "Not me."

"Everyone needs a rebound," Happy kept up. "And you're perfect for that."

"You're about to get it, cat. Mira's my friend. And you know that I'm with Natsu."

He only snickered. "I'm just joking. Sheesh, Lucy, you take everything so seriously."

"Yeah, sure."

"I," Levy went on, "just think that Laxus and Mirajane did a lot for all of us these past few weeks and that we kinda owe them. Don't we?"

"You too are donating Lucy to Laxus?" Lily sighed. "I suppose I will cast my vote the same way."

"Lily!" Lucy complained as the two Exceeds only snickered. Gajeel was more concerned with the fact that Lisanna still hadn't passed by and that he couldn't find her anywhere.

"I am about to get behind that damn bar and get my own beer," he grumbled to which Levy only shushed him again.

"What can we do for them though? Seriously, guys?" the letter mage asked. "I mean, it's all kinda our fault that they broke up, isn't it?"

"Oh, I'm sorry," Gajeel grumbled. "Did I make the two of them incompatible and completely wrong for one another? My bad."

"Stop being so grouchy," Levy said as Lily only snickered.

"I do agree," Lucy said slowly. "With some of that, at least. We didn't make them all break up…did we?"

"I think you did, Lucy."

"Look, Happy, if you don't-"

"I'm just saying," Levy intervened, "that they broke up on one of their stupid counseling session things, right? That's what I heard."

"More or less," Lucy agreed.

"Well, we're the ones that kept encouraging the whole thing," Levy insisted. "We all let Mira think that she was the goddess of therapy and kept letting her take us all out places. If we hadn't done that, she would have been over the whole thing long before they took Freed out and ended up in that big fight."

"Or," Gajeel kept up. "They would have just had a fight over something else because that's what happens and you're both just trying to get involved in this because you're as nosey as Mirajane. Now, where is her fucking sister?"

"Is, uh, something wrong, Gajeel?" Lucy asked, rubbing at the back of her neck. "Or-"

"When isn't something wrong?" Levy sighed. Lily's snickers agitated him that time though and Gajeel turned his glare on him.

"What, cat? You think it's funny, huh? That I can't even get any damn service in this guildhall because Lisanna's too damn stupid-"

"All this over a beer?" Levy rolled her eyes. "Anyways, we should just do something for Mira and Laxus."

"Like what?" Lucy asked. "I mean, they're broken up now. It's not like we can just take them out to dinner. Unless…I guess we could take them out each separately or something."

"Can I not go on the Laxus dinner?" Happy asked. "Please?"

"I find that I would rather not enjoy that either," Lily agreed.

"Yeah, uh, Gajeel and I already went to dinner with Laxus and it was okay," Levy said slowly. "No need to do it again."

"Well I'm not going alone," Lucy complained.

"Maybe we can all just give Laxus a gift," Happy suggested. "And take Mirajane to dinner."

"What kinda gift can we get Laxus though?" Levy asked. "I mean-"

"Lucy."

"For the last time, cat-"

"Hey, are you guys gonna come on this job or what?" Natsu was back then, coming to hand off one of the request fliers to his girlfriend. "I think I picked a great one."

"You always think that," Lucy sighed as she took the paper from him. Happy only grinned up at his friend though.

"Hey, Natsu, do you think it's okay if Lucy goes on a date with Laxus to make him feel better?"

"Happy-"

"Why would that make him feel better?" the slayer asked, scratching at his head. "I mean-"

"I think Happy's a little sidetracked," Levy said with a giggle, glancing at Natsu. "But hey, you know Laxus pretty well, right?"

"Right."

"As well as you can know someone who you annoy constantly and hates when you talk to him," Lucy mumbled as she took to reading over the flier. "With those qualifications, he knows him awfully well."

"Well," Levy went on. "What do you think we should do for him? We're trying to do something for both Mira and Laxus, you know? Since they broke up?"

He gave her a blank stare and, for a moment, she feared that he'd either forgotten that they'd broken up or that they were ever together. Instead, he only shrugged.

"You should give them therapy."

"Eh?" Even Gajeel glanced over at that one, giving up his fruitless search for Lisanna. "Therapy?"

"Sure," Natsu said, taking the job request back from Lucy then before looking around for Makarov or whoever was tending bar. He wanted to get gone and fast. "That's what they all did for us. Now they need it returned back to them. You can counsel them and get them back together. That's all Laxus would want."

For a moment, they all just sat there. Then Happy snickered.

"Natsu came up with a better solution than you, Lucy."

"He came up with a better one than you too!"

"We could do that," Lily said slowly. "I suppose."

"How though?" Levy asked. "Mira won't go for it. Lisanna says that she doesn't even want to talk about it with her. And Laxus would never let us do something like that to him."

When everyone looked to Natsu again, he just frowned, suspicious.

"What?" he complained. "Do I have something in my teeth?"

"No," Lucy said slowly. "But you had the answer to the last question, so-"

"Oh." Then he grinned, punching at the air. "Tell Laxus that if he shows up, he can fight me! No way he'd pass up on-"

"And we should have quit while he was ahead," Happy sighed.

"He was ahead at something?"

That came from Gray, who had been walking passed, but stopped at the words.

"Really?" the ice mage insisted. "I'm impressed already."

Natsu only growled, turning his eyes onto his sworn rival. "Why don't you just keep walking, pervert? We're busy."

"Pervert? How am I-"

"Gray, your clothes," Cana sighed from the table next to theirs. To Levy and Lucy though, she only said, "If you wanna get Mirajane somewhere, that's easy enough. Just tell her that you're taking her out for some other reason. Any other reason. She'll go if it's interesting enough to her. And Laxus, well, just get one of the Thunder Legion to invite him out somewhere. He'll do almost anything for one of them."

"Are you speaking of Mirajane and Laxus?" Erza came over then as well. "And trying to find a solution for their tiff?"

"Does everyone in this damn hall just think they're invited to come join in on conversations?" Gajeel complained. "And for the last time, where is Lisanna?"

"Uh, yeah," Levy said slowly, glancing at Erza. "Why?"

"I am concerned as well," she said. "Mirajane and I are friends, after all."

"After all," Lucy mumbled. "And if you're so concerned, why are you taking the job request from Natsu?"

"W-Well, I might be a tad more concerned with this, sure, but I came over here for the conversation." Nodding her head then, Erza said, "Excellent choice, Natsu. Come. Let's-"

"You just came over here to speed things along," Lucy accused. "And we'll leave after we finish this."

When Erza gave her a look, the blonde only grinned sheepishly before getting to her feet.

"Or, uh, we can go now," she said. "Whatever you want, Erza."

Snickering, Happy took to the air. "You're in trouble, Lucy."

"Shush, cat."

"I don't wanna go on a job with this idiot," Natsu complained, as he and Gray glared at one another.

"Oh, yeah, like I wanna go with you, flame breath."

"Then why are you trying to?"

"I never said I was!"

Erza frowned, glancing up from the flier. "The two of you aren't fighting, are you, boys?"

"Wha'?" Gray looked away first. "Us?"

"No way!" Natsu even trough down some laughter. "The two of us? Never."

"Never," Gray agreed. "Best buddies right here."

"Totally."

That made the ice mage frown some. "Would you stop trying to get the last word?"

"Me? You're the one that keeps-"

"Yeah, because you keep-"

"If," Cana spoke up again after taking a long gulp from her barrel of wine, "you guys want my input on the subject-"

"Why would anyone want that?" Gajeel asked. "Why would I want any of your inputs? I was trying to have a drink, with my shrimp, and my kitty when you idiots all-"

"-the thing to get Mirajane interested in going is pretty simple," Cana said with a nod of her head.

"And what's that?" Lucy asked as Erza only turned to walk off, Natsu and Gray taking to glaring at one another the second her back was turned. "Cana?"

"Tell her that she finally got her Gray and Juvia thing to go through," she said. "That'll perk her right up. Say that they're dating and that they want her to go out with the two of them, as a celebratory-"

"What?" Gray was completely done with Natsu then. "Why would you even suggest something so-"

"Did I hear what I think I heard?"

And Gajeel only groaned as the rain woman appeared  _literally_  out of nowhere, coming to toss her arms around Gray.

"We are going on a date?" She even bounced slightly as she held tight to him. "I knew this day would come!"

"No," he hissed. "We're not. We-"

"Gray," Cana complained. "Do you want Mirajane to be miserable forever?"

"No. But there are other options for-"

"Then just go on one fake date with Juvia and-"

"That's not fair! Why do I have to give up for them? Her and Laxus didn't help me any with this therapy stuff," he said. "And what do you mean about Mirajane trying to get me and Juvia to-"

"Oh, Gray," Levy sighed. "Were you that blind? Mira's been trying at that for weeks now."

"Yeah, well, she can keep trying, but it's not gonna do any good," he said, trying to shake Juvia off. "I'm not going to-"

"Gray." Erza turned then, on her heel, to stare at him. "Are you saying that you do not believe that Mirajane had done enough for you over the years to qualify you to make a little sacrifice for her sometimes?"

"A little? This is-" Then he saw the look in Erza's eyes and gave into his fate, allowing Juvia to hug him without even fighting it. "I guess not."

"Good. It is decided then." Erza set out once more. "We will take this small job and then, when we return, we will begin preparations on counseling Mirajane and Laxus. Even getting them back together if it's necessary. Now, I know that Master is gone, but where is Lisanna? Someone must process this request."

"That is what I've been sayin' for the past hour," Gajeel complained. "I mean-"

"I can find her," Natsu said, nodding his head before taking a big whiff of the air. "I smell her right now."

Levy elbowed Gajeel. "Why didn't you think of that?"

"Don't test me, shrimp."

"Lisanna," Happy called as he flew after Natsu who assumed the scent trailing position, which just meant that he got down on all fours and sniffed at the ground, nearly running into almost everyone he passed. "We're gonna find you!"

"Because I don't see this ending horribly," Lucy sighed, following along. "And Natsu, is that really necessary?"

"It is completely necessary."

"Yeah, Lucy," Happy agreed. "Completely."

Natsu led his two friends out of the main part of the hall and into one off the halls. He came to a stop at one of the closet doors.

"Lisanna," he called. "Are you in there?"

It took a moment. "Uh…yeah. Did you…need something? Or-"

Natsu only popped up then, reaching out to open the door. "Yeah, I- Oh. Hey, Bickslow."

"Go away," the seith growled from his position the floor, visor pushed up as he glared out at them. "Seriously."

Lisanna, who was sitting in his lap, only frowned over her shoulder. "We're a little busy."

"You do know that you're on the job right now, right?" Lucy asked slowly, rubbing awkwardly at her neck. "I mean, Gajeel's about to lose it out there."

Happy only covered his mouth with his paws. "You guys are in  _love_."

"Yeah, sure, just close the door," the seith grumbled. Then, to Lisanna, he said, "Your friends are annoying."

"We need to talk to you anyways, Bickslow," Natsu said with a nod of his head. "It's important."

"Schedule an appointment," he growled. "I'm free anytime other than  _now_. So-"

"It's about Mirajane and Laxus," Happy said. "We want to get them back in love too!"

"Guys, I don't think this is the time," Lucy tried. "Maybe-"

"What's the plan?" Hearing her sister's name was all Lisanna needed to stand right back up. She and Bickslow couldn't have been doing much as the only thing she really had to do was straighten her shirt a tad before facing them. "Happy?"

"Uh, Lissy," Bickslow complained. "We were kinda-"

"Ah. Lisanna. They found you. Good work, Natsu." Erza appeared then too. "Here. This is the job that we are-"

"Here you are." And there was Gajeel and Lily as well. "You know, I tried to be nice about it and just drink, you know, the wrong beer, but I ain't puttin' up with it! This guildhall's bad enough, but now I can't even get drunk the way I wanna? You better shape up or ship out!"

"By which Gajeel means," Lily snickered as he fluttered along, "you gave him the wrong ale."

"The completely wrong one!"

Lisanna only stared at all of them. "This is a lot to take in. Let's focus on Happy right now. What was that about Mira and Laxus?"

"Boss?" Bickslow perked up. "Is he here?"

"No, but-"

"Oh. Then I don't care." Reaching out of the closet then, he tried to drag Lisanna back in. "Go away. All of you. There has to be other people in this guild to deal with your prob- And Erza's giving me looks. Get away from me, Lisanna. Gotta save myself."

"Stop pushing me," she complained as he only shoved her right back out of the closet before closing the door behind her. "So annoying."

"Mirajane and Laxus can be dealt with later," Erza told them all harshly. "And so can Gajeel."

"No," Black Steel growled. "He can't."

"Alright," Lisanna said slowly, glancing away from Happy then. "Uh, what was it you wanted then? Erza?"

"The job. Fill the request. Please."

"Right. I can do that. Of course I can do that."

"And then," Happy said, "we can talk about Laxus and Mirajane, right? Maybe? Erza?"

"No." She turned to walk off then. "We have a job to do."

"Fine," the Exceed complained. "Teaser though, Lisanna. Gray and Juvia are going on a date!"

"What?" She was quick to head after them, Natsu and Lucy following. "You can't leave me with only that. I need more information!"

Gajeel only growled, following them with the snickering Pantherlily. "Just get my beer, woman! I hope you're not expecting a tip after all of this."

"Wow, Gajeel," Natsu snickered along with Happy. "That's how you handle problems now?"

"Yeah," Happy giggled, though he made sure to stay close to Lucy, just in case. He wasn't as stupid as Natsu. "You don't sound tough at all anymore!"

"Look, you stupid little-"

"No tip?" Lisanna shook her head. "Then why should I even bother getting you a new beer?"

"What? You little-"

"Don't make me sic my boyfriend on you," she threatened.

"Yeah, like I'm afraid of someone who plays with dolls. Try again, girlie."

"I'll get my sister's boyfriend to kill you then."

"Laxus and your freaky sister broke up, last time I checked."

"And last time I checked, he's still in love with her, which means he'll do whatever I want him to do. So-"

"Hey, that's a good angle," Happy told her as she went behind the bar to get the request sent in. "We can completely bypass the Thunder Legion and go through you. Can you get Mira and Laxus to both-"

"Later," Erza reminded. "I mean it, Happy. We have a job to do and-"

"Why are you guys talking about sis and that unmanly scumbag?"

That came from Elfman who they found was seated at the bar, a newspaper out in front of him.

"Uh, don't you mean the idiot that left the most glorious man to ever walk the face of this planet?"

And that, of course, came from Evergreen, who was seated next to her boyfriend at the bar, filing her nails.

"Mirajane is  _not_  an idiot, Ever."

"Uh, yeah, Elf, she is."

"Don't you talk about my sister that way!"

"And don't you talk about my Laxus that way."

"Oh, now he's your Laxus? Really?"

"Really."

"That's-"

"We're getting Mirajane and Laxus back together," Lisanna told them before they dissolved any further into their fight. "And-"

"Fill the request, Lisanna," Erza said as she turned to walk away from the bar. "We're leaving. Come on, guys. And where is Gray?"

"Uh, I think he's being smothered to death by Juvia," Lucy said, pointing over to where the man had yet to be unable to escape the other mage's grasp. "Maybe we should just leave him to her."

"Ha ha!" Natsu punched the air. "See that, little buddy? Gray's all tangled up in a woman. Which means, of course, that I win."

"Win what?" Lucy asked.

"Uh, gee, Luce, the obvious competition we were having to see who wasn't smothered to death by a woman."

"When were you having that-"

"As soon as he saw that he was going to win," Happy said. "Duh. Come on, Lucy. That was obvious."

"So obvious," she grumbled as she walked off with them. "Shocking I didn't get it."

Lisanna, left behind the bar, only sighed, glancing at her brother and his girlfriend.

"So are you guys gonna help?" she asked.

"Help with what?"

"Help get Mira and Laxus back together, Elf. Duh."

"What," Ever complained, "do you think everyone's been doing for the past, oh, two weeks?"

Making a face at the other woman, the younger of the two said, "But this time there's a plan."

"What plan?"

"Well, I don't know. Happy came up with it."

"Oh, great," Ever said with a nod of her head. "Mirajane and Laxus closest friends couldn't get them back together, but a stupid plan thought up by an idiot will. That's great, Lisanna. Put some money on that one."

"Watch who you're talkin' about," Gajeel grumbled, though he still only glared at Lisanna. "My shrimp came up with that plan."

"Did she?" Lisanna shrugged. "Well… Did you need something, Gajeel or-"

"My beer!"

Elfman snorted. "Men don't yell at women."

"What'd you just say to me?" Gajeel growled. "You stupid little-"

"Great, Elf," Ever complained. "Argue with Gajeel. That'll solve everything and not cause any problems at all."

It was his turn to growl. "Ever, I'm trying to deal with something here!"

Lily snickered. "What happened to not yelling at women?"

Lisanna only groaned. "Okay, okay. Enough. This isn't helping Mira and Laxus which, obviously, is what we're all here for."

"No," Gajeel complained. "It's not. Now get me my-"

"Did someone mention Laxus?"

Again, they were joined, though that time it was by Carla, who spoke, and Wendy.

"Because," the Exceed went on as she landed on the bar in front of Lisanna, "there is a very pressing matter I must discuss with him involving tea that he owes-"

"He's not here," Lisanna said with a shrug. "We're just working on getting him and Mirajane back together."

"No, Lisanna," Gajeel insisted. "Only you're doing that. And at this point, I'm nearly certain it's just to piss me off!"

"Well aren't you a clever one?"

"You-"

"I really hope that they get back together too," Wendy said as she frowned a little. "I think it's sucks that they broke up. I really thought that they were cute together."

"I think you're alone on that ship," Lisanna told her. "But we do have a plan going that you're welcome to get involved in-"

"You're not even masterminding this," Lily pointed out. "You were literally brought in on the tail end of things. And not even because anyone wanted you involved."

"I don't remember it that way."

"Of course not."

"I'm pretty sure Bickslow and I orchestrated the whole thing."

"Figures."

Elfman only shook his head. "You shouldn't get involved, sis. Mirajane told us both that she's fine without Laxus and that this was going to be the ending to this all along. If she don't want you poking your nose in it, then-"

"She's just saying that because she's scared, Elf," Lisanna said. "I mean, sure, who in their right mind would want to get back with Laxus?"

"Uh, try everyone."

"No, Ever," the younger woman retorted. "They wouldn't. But Mira does. I can tell. I'm her sister."

"I don't care," Gajeel growled. "Just get me my beer."

"Are you still on about that?"

"Lisanna-"

"Just get it for him," Carla complained. "He looks like he's about to blow a gasket."

"Or a nose stud," Wendy quipped which got some giggles. Not from the slayer though. And, finally bored with him, Lisanna went to get him the drink that he wanted.

"Here you go," she said, setting the mug in front of him. "You're welcome."

It only took a sniff.

"This is the wrong drink. It's the same wrong one that you gave me before which is making me question why the hell you're tending bar."

Lisanna just stared at him. "You know, you get more flies with honey than vinegar."

"The hell would I want flies for?"

"I don't know, Gajeel. It's a saying. What? Am I supposed to understand every saying I use? I mean-"

"Thank you," the slayer growled when, at the sound of the guildhall doors opening, he turned and found that it was Mirajane walking in. The night shift was starting. "Finally. You know how sad it is, Lisanna, that the airhead is more competent than you behind the bar? Do you- And she's gone."

Pantherlily only shook his head as Lisanna headed back down the hall. "The closet awaits."

* * *

"I really don't want to be here right now."

"Come on, boss," Bickslow said as he led the man down the road. "What's the big deal? Me and Lissy miss you."

"Yeah," Lisanna insisted as she walked along with them. "Can't I miss you, Laxus? I mean, we spent, like, every day that you weren't out on a job together. Just because you and Mirajane are broken up, what? That means that you don't care about me at all anymore?"

"I didn't say that," he grumbled. "But-"

"Oy, boss, we're just takin' ya to dinner. Our treat," the seith said, reaching over to pat the man on the shoulder. "Even saved up some jewels just for the occasion."

"Really?"

"Sure."

Of course not. Why would he? His and Lisanna's obligation would be filled the second they got the man to the restaurant. Everything after that would be on the next pair they passed the torch to.

Then he and Lisanna could get back to hanging out and wasting the day away. He liked the idea of smoking, drinking, and then banging, but she usually liked drinking, banging, and then smoking so, really, the day was up for grabs.

Hmmm.

For Lisanna though, it wasn't at all. A week or so had passed since that day in the bar where the plan was originally formulated and now, with Team Natsu back from their little trip, things were finally underway. So long as Gray and Juvia had held up their end of things with Mirajane, when they showed up with Laxus, things would really get going.

Not that they would be able to see it all come into fruition. Nope. Her and Bickslow, as the others claimed, were not finishers. Or starters, really, but they were the least likely Laxus would suspect of actually pulling something so massive off (tricking him and Mirajane into a counseling session, sure, but something like this, no way).

Plus, they both insisted on having a part in it all and they were so annoying about it that the others had no choice, but to include them. They were honestly just that annoying.

With so many moving parts, it was a monster to plan, but so far, so good. On Lisanna and Bickslow's half. And honestly, that was all they cared about. If everyone else failed and Mirajane and Laxus didn't get back together, they would be able to hold it over the others for, oh, ever that they'd gotten their end done.

Oh, and Ever and Elf had theirs finished which was, of course, to stay the hell out of everything. Levy and Lucy made that one pretty clear (in much nicer words). The two of them just wouldn't be good at bringing people together. Heck, they could hardly keep themselves together.

"Sure?" Laxus repeated. "What do you mean? That was a yes or no question."

"Then yes."

"Bickslow-"

"What do you think I'm doin' then, boss? Huh? If not what I just told you that I am?"

"I think that you idiots are gonna eat a lot, get a huge bill, and dump it on me."

"What? Us? Never."

"That does sound like us, Bicks," Lisanna pointed out.

"Yeah, Lissy, I know, but we're not."

"We're not," his dolls, who were floating around, insisted. "We're not, boss. We're not."

"Alright, alright," he grumbled. "And you better not anyhow, because I will just pay for myself and leave you idiots to wash dishes or floors."

"I think that's just in cartoons, Laxus," Lisanna told him slowly. "I think they would just arrest us in real life."

"Good. You dummies need a night in the slammer."

"I do not like the sound of that at all, no," Bickslow said with a shake of his head. "Could you imagine it, boss? A guy like me? A single father of five? In jail? I mean, obviously, I would do great in there, I'd probably become, like, a prison god or something-"

"Obviously," Lisanna agreed.

"-but I would enjoy it so much that I'd probably never make it back out. And we can't have that, can we?"

"I don't see why not, but whatever," Laxus sighed as he only continued to trudge along. There was no part of him that wanted to go out with the two idiots. None. And if it had just been Bickslow to show up, he might have managed some way to weasel out of it (or just sent the dumbass packing), but with Lisanna there, well, Laxus couldn't pass up on an opportunity like that, could he? Though he wouldn't say it aloud, some info on Mirajane would be nice. And who better to somehow get to slip up on it than her sister? "Can we just stop talking though? For now? I have a headache."

"Sure, boss," Bickslow said. "Or should I say yes?"

"No, idiot, right then saying sure would have been fine."

"No need for the harsh words, boss. I am buying you dinner after all."

Or more like not at all.

Hehe.

Laxus was in for a shock when, as they walked into the restaurant, a scent hit him. It was, of course, a very strong one. Mirajane. It was very obviously Mirajane. And it was a lot stronger than it should have been, had it just been lingering on Lisanna or something.

Mira was there.

"No need for assistance, simple hostess," Bickslow said to the woman at the front, ready to seat them. "Our group's right-"

"No. Bickslow-"

"Come on, boss." The seith only tugged him along and, honestly, Laxus was too shocked to fight it.

Had Mirajane put them up to this? Did she want to see him? He couldn't run off if that was the case. He'd go see her and they-

And no. It wasn't the case. At all. Her face as she noticed his approach said it all.

"Laxus." It was Gray that spoke that. He was there with Mirajane for some reason, Juvia sitting on the same side of the table with him. That was hard to miss, honesty, as the rain woman was practically in his lap as she did not, at all, allow any space in the booth to be between her and her beloved. "You made it."

"What do you mean?" Laxus growled. Mirajane though was only staring at her sister.

"Lisanna," she hissed. "What-"

"What's that, Bickslow? You left the stove on?" Lisanna looked to her boyfriend. "That's a shame."

"Eh? Oh, no, yeah. Totally. Don't wanna burn down the apartment, boss. Cheers!"

Laxus tried to grab at them, but the two idiot were wiry and made it out with the seith's babies in tow.

"Don't bother with them," Gray told Laxus though, upon closer inspection, the Dragon Slayer found that the other mage looked extremely uncomfortable. Which was odd, considering he was the same mage that walked around naked (or close to it) ninety percent of the time. "I asked Bickslow and Lisanna to get you."

"And why," Mira asked, "would you do that? You said that you wanted to invite me out as-"

"A thank you," Juvia agreed, nodding her head as she left her arms wrapped tightly around Gray. "And it is. But we also have to thank you too, Laxus. It was because of the two of you that we get to be together now, after all."

"After all," Gray grumbled. "Uh, Juvia, would you mind loosening up a tad? I mean-"

"A thank you?" Laxus frowned. "For what? We didn't get the two of you-"

" _I_  got them together," Mirajane said then, sitting up taller than before. She wouldn't look at her dragon though. "Of course they would be thankful."

"And how did you do that? I mean-"

"Shut up, Laxus."

"Don't you tell me to shut up! I-"

"Shut," Mirajane hissed, "up, Laxus."

"Look you-"

"Hey, guys, don't start arguing." Gray tried to put his hands up, but they were currently pinned to his sides by his overly affectionate (and apparent) girlfriend. "Juvia here let me in on the fact that the two of you helped convince me to ask her to out. And you did. Thinking back on it, I can definitely think of instances of you implementing it on me. So just sit down, Laxus, and let me buy you some dinner. Steak sound good?"

When the man just glared at him, Mirajane literally gave out an uncharacteristic groan.

"Just sit down, Laxus," she complained, even sliding over in the booth. "They went through a lot, I'm sure, to get Lisanna and Bickslow to do that, so-"

"You don't tell me what to do, Mirajane."

"Then go! Just leave."

"I just said that you don't tell me what to-"

"Not to be a bother," Gray started then, "but you're making a scene."

Laxus only turned his glare back to the maker mage. "You're literally sitting here in a button up shirt and your boxers, bro."

"Wh- When did that-"

"No, no," Juvia said as Gray tried to pull his downed pants off the floor and back up, all without even standing (he wasn't doing so hot). "It is much better this way."

Rolling his eyes then, the Dragon Slayer sighed audibly before moving to take a seat next to his (apparently ex) girlfriend.

There was no point in fighting it. If the idiots had constructed such an elaborate scheme, why blow it for them? Sometimes being at the top of the guild like he was meant, yes, harping on the others, but just the same, it also meant keeping from discouraging them. And though he hated being the butt of the plan, he had to hand it to them; they'd achieved crossover with Juvia and Gray mixing with Bickslow and Lisanna.

Oh, if only he knew. If only.

Mirajane, clearly, had had her bravado broken by his appearance and even looked a tad flustered. Part of Laxus wanted to just go ahead and leave, to make her feel better, but the vengeful part of him who, after that dinner with Freed, had gone over to her house, ready to talk it out only to be thwarted didn't want to do anything close to that. She was the one in the wrong. Her. He was Laxus freaking Dreyar. He didn't need a woman to begin. She'd been lucky to get what she'd gotten. And now that it was over, well, sucked to be her.

"Anyways," Gray got back to saying then, looking to Mira. "It just hit me one day, you know? That Juvia and I…belong together."

The woman in question squealed, squeezing him harder. Mira only blinked.

"I understand that part," she said. "It's only… You've known of her feelings for you for some time. I'm just…surprised that the little effort that I put into this actually pulled something off."

"Of course it did," Juvia said, glancing over at them. She had a job to do too, after all. If she blew it, then her and Gray's time with Mira and Laxus would be over and, well, her (fake) relationship with Gray would be also. She was hoping that during the time she was convincing Laxus and Mirajane to get back together that she might also get Gray to see how great the two of them would be together. A pipe dream, sure, but no more than most of the ones she had. "You're a miracle worker, Mirajane. And you too, Laxus. You both just mesh so well together. As counselors, of course."

"Of course," Laxus grumbled.

Mirajane didn't even glance at him. She was refusing to. "Well, thank you for feeling so grateful. I just wish that you had realized how…awkward this is for Laxus and I."

"Well," Gray said as he went back to trying to shove Juvia off. It was as futile as ever. "We just thought that we should thank you both at the same time."

"But why?"

"Eh?"

"Why?" Mira insisted. "I don't understand-"

"What difference does it make?" Laxus shook his head. "We're here now so-"

"Shut up, Laxus."

"Look, woman, if you don't stop-"

"Oh, wow, I can't believe you guys are here."

Then, suddenly, at their table were two more people that Laxus did  _not_  want to see. At all.

"Hi," Mirajane said slowly, staring up at Levy and Gajeel, the former holding Pantherlily in her arms. "Uh, are you guys-"

"This is a damn conspiracy," Laxus growled as the sight of them. Gajeel only snarled back.

"What are you talkin' about? I am just takin' my cat and my shrimp out to eat." Then, he was elbowed by Levy, he added, "The cat and the shrimp that I have such a great relationship with because of you and Mirajane. So what a coincidence that we have stumbled up you-"

"You guys could have at least tried to come up with some convincing dialogue," Laxus added. You know, since he was the master of coming up with stuff like that. "I mean-"

"What are you talking about?" Lily asked. "We are merely out for a meal."

"Right."

"We are."

"Laxus, shush," Mirajane sighed, rolling her eyes. "Do you have to fight with everyone?"

"Fight? I'm not fighting with anyone, woman, so-"

"Shush."

"Mirajane-" She didn't cut him off that time. No, he stopped himself. Mainly because a scent hit him. Looking up, he said, "No. No way. Is that-"

"Natsu, we're not supposed to be here yet," Lucy was complaining as she and her boyfriend came into the restaurant, Happy tagging along with them. "The plan is for us to show up when Carla and Wendy do. Look, Gajeel and Levy are still here. Which means-"

"Laxus! Mirajane!" Happy flew right passed the hostess and headed over to the table where all the others were. "What a surprise! Now where's Carla?"

"What is going on?" Mirajane looked straight to Levy. "Why are-"

"I'm not a part of this," Laxus said, starting to get to his feet. "I'm not-"

"Enough!" Gray had finally managed to shove Juvia off though it involved him also tumbling out of the booth, bumping into the already agitated Gajeel.

"G-Gray." Juvia was scrambling after him. "What-"

"I said that I would go on this fake damn date with you," he hissed, "but this is just-"

"What are you doing?" Lucy complained, coming over as well to frown at him. "You're ruining things!"

"Hey, Gray, get up!" Natsu came to kick at him. "Ruinin' things, is he, Luce? Well-"

"So are you!"

"I'm not doing this either," Mira said as, after Laxus got out of the booth and started to head off, she quickly followed. "At all."

"Doing what?" Levy wasn't ready to see it all blow up. "Guys-"

"Learn to plan shit better," Laxus growled over his shoulder. "I managed to trick the damn demon through nearly all of your stupid counseling sessions and you idiots couldn't even pull this off? I mean, honestly?"

"What are you talking about?" Finally, Mira looked at him. It was hard not to. In her rush to get away, she'd caught him at the entrance to the restaurant (the hostess had vacated to deal with the brewing Gray and Natsu fight which, of course, also involved a cheering Happy and Lily as well as a growling Gajeel) and he had said something that sparked her interest, if only a little. "Tricking me?"

He only snorted, not even holding the door open for her. "What do you think I mean? I made all that shit up, Mira. I bought Cana off with booze, I gave Carla tea, I promised Gajeel a concert-"

"What?"

"You were never any good at this." They were outside then, on the sidewalk, and he stopped to face her. "You sucked at it, so I made it work for you. Are you that stupid that you never realized- Don't walk away from- Mira!"

It wasn't like he wanted to chase after her. At all. He was tired of Mirajane. He was tired of the guild. He was tired of whatever stupid plan it was that the others had hatched that had fallen through. He'd had two weeks to think things over and clarity was winning out. All he ever did when he was with Mirajane was work on keeping her happy. Well guess what? It was time to make himself happy.

Then it had to go and happen. Some drunk had to fall all over Mira, just right down the road, and he had to run down to there to protect her. From the drunk.

"Cana?"

The woman, for some reason or other that no doubt had to do with the big elaborate scheme the others had going on, was dressed in a heavy trench coat, probably to hide or something else stupid like that, but had been stumbling around the block, intoxicated and lost. When she'd seen Mirajane running off, well, what was she left to do, but pounce on her?

"Get off her." Laxus came to drag the drunk off as Mirajane, eyes still stinging from the tears that had been threatening to fall due to her dragon, only stared. "Cana, what are you-"

"Hey! Don't touch me!" Cana jerked away from him. "I'm a lady."

"Oh, yeah, okay. How much have you had to drink today?"

"Bah! I don't ans'er to ya! Laxus! It's your fault that I'm 'lone."

"What are you talking about?"

Cana, leaning heavily against him then as, after shoving away, she found it too hard to stand on her own, only said, "Erza and Freed were takin' me to the place to do the thing with the other… I's the mastermind! Since you payed me and Bacchus bill that day, Laxus. You're real good guy some-"

"Erza and Freed, Cana."

"They's takin' me, but then they got into a fight!"

"A fight?" Laxus frowned. "What are you going on about? Why were you with- Are you talking about that stupid thing back at the restaurant? They were taking you there and then got into a fight?"

"Sure."

He'd already had the sure discussion with Bickslow once and was not having it with another idiot then.

"Over what?"

"Freed said that ya were right and Erza said that Mira cou' do better and-"

"I don't have time for this." Laxus looked down at Mirajane who was getting to her feet then. "Are you alright? Mira, don't walk away, I'm asking you a fucking question."

"Hey!" Cana yelled as he shoved her off though, luckily, she was able to catch herself, as he took of after the demon once more. "This what I get, huh? For fixin' ya?"

"Mira," Laxus called.

"No."

"Just come here."

"I said no."

She wasn't running though and, when he did, he caught her easily. Mirajane just pulled away though, when he tried to grab her and, giving up, he took to only following her.

"Laxus. Mirajane."

Then they ran into a very irate looking Erza who was walking down the sidewalk, coming the other way. In her hand was a blade.

"Have you see-"

"Cana's drunk and you just left her-"

"Not her," she hissed, cutting Laxus off. "Freed. You do  _not_  challenge me to a battle and then-" She stopped, suddenly, in front of Mirajane, causing both her and Laxus to do the same. "Oh. The two of you are back together then, I take it?"

Mira only gave her a look. "What do you think?"

"Well, I am uncertain, but-"

"Stop snapping at people," Laxus said, frowning over at the takeover mage. "You're mad at me, not Erza."

"So you are not back together." Erza nodded. "Yes, well, that is most unfortunate."

"What are you taking about?" Laxus grumbled. They were standing in the middle of the sidewalk, forcing others to go around them, but considering they were some of the most recognizable mages in Fairy Tail and were still very much so some of the best, no one made any direct complaints. "Cana told us that you and Freed are fighting over how Mira could do better."

"Oh, she can." Erza spared no feelings. Ever. "Of course she can."

"Thanks," he grumbled dryly. "Then what's your point?"

"Just because she can doesn't mean she should." The swordswoman's eyes were still darting around, as if she was trying to locate someone. No doubt Freed still. "I very much so liked the two of you together."

"I think you're the only one," Mirajane told her, face still contorted into an uncharacteristic frown. "Erza."

Shrugging, she said, "I just thought it was nice that finally all the top mages in the guild could get along without tension. You kept Laxus from getting upset and he kept you from failing, once more, to beat me at your numerous-"

"What is that you want, Erza?" Laxus asked. "That you stopped us?"

"Directions to your follower. We have a score to settle."

"Yeah, well, I like the Thunder Legion in tact, so that isn't going to happen."

Erza huffed, looking them both up and down once before moving to walk around them. "Fine. I will locate him myself. I hope the two of you have a nice day, anyhow. And for what it's worth, you were very much so right, Mirajane."

The other woman only blinked. "About what?"

"Jellal and I. We are together. And you did help us, in a roundabout way. We did not wish for anyone to know and, through your insistence that we go out to dinner with you, we were able to go on a date, in Magnolia, out in the open. You as well, Laxus. It is a shame that we won't be able to do that again.

Snort. "Yeah, right. Jellal was an idiot. That punk kept tryin' to-"

"You and Jellal- Wait, Erza! We have to talk about-"

"No," she said as she swiftly moved down the street and away from them. "We don't."

Mirajane though, at hearing news like that, couldn't keep her sour expression or demeanor for long. After all, it was off the coupling of her guild mates that she thrived, not herself.

"Did you hear that, Laxus?" She was literally bouncing as she grabbed onto his arm in her excitement. "Now that Erza's with Jellal, I just have to find someone for Wendy and Laki and you-"

"And me?" He shook her off. "What's wrong with you, woman?"

"Huh?"

Growling, Laxus said, "You can't put me with someone, demon. I'm with you!"

She blinked, staring up at him. "No, Laxus, you're not."

"Yes, I am. Just because we're broken up doesn't mean that you can go around, putting me with other woman. What's wrong with you?"

"I think that's exactly what it-"

"There's somethin' wrong with you." He set off then too and, with Erza long gone, Mirajane only followed. "I mean, what? You think that we can just go back to being guild members like it's nothing?"

"I don't get what else you would want, Laxus. You said that you were tired of-"

"I said that I was tired of trying to keep you happy and that I want to make me happy. Or for you to at least put in an equal effort on my front. It's not fair, Mira, that I constantly have to give and give for you just so that you can berate me or act like I do absolutely nothing for you. It's not fair. I love you and I'm pretty sure that you just like to use me as a prop."

"That's not true. How could you say that?"

"Uh, because it is true." He'd stopped again, just to glare at her. His scar was much more menacing when he was upset. "You just like to show me off as the guy that you changed or your prime example of how good your skills are at match making. They're not! You just got lucky with Levy and Gajeel, everyone already knew Natsu and Lucy were happening, and seriously. What? You figured out that Erza's been banging the guy that she's clearly had feelings for, albeit rather awkward and odd ones, since you met her? Great, Mira. You're a true match-"

"Why are you being so mean to me? What have I done, Laxus? Huh?"

"What have you- You didn't describe me as your perfect man!"

They were both just staring at one another then, but it was Mirajane that spoke next.

"Is that seriously what this is all about? Why we're breaking up? Because you're so insecure about some stupid made up guy who, by the way, was gay in the fantasy, hence the reason he was with Freed, that I would never be with anyway?" She huffed. "You don't think that if I wanted a guy like that, I wouldn't go find one? Seriously, Laxus? I chose you, idiot. Why do you have to be so…so…stupid?"

His breath left then as he just stared at her. "Mira, don't cry. I-"

"I'm not!" She sniffled. "You big jerk."

"No, seriously, stop it. C'mere."

"No."

So he just got closer, first just laying a hand on her shoulder before, slowly, moving to hug her.

"It's okay."

"No, it's not. You're being mean to me over something stupid and-"

"I'm not being mean. I'm just…upset. That's all."

"That's not all. You're mean."

"Demon-"

"No."

Bowing his head, he pressed a kiss to her forehead, forgetting for a moment that they still, very much so, were in the middle of the sidewalk, out in public. "It's okay."

"No. You came and yelled at me the other day-"

"I yelled at you? You yelled at me. You said that if I wanted to be done, fine, then you would be and that I could just go-"

"Because you came over yelling about how-"

"Because you were mad at me over-"

"I should have been! You said that you wanted to sleep with my friends."

"…Yeah, that was bad."

"That was very bad."

"But you got what I meant, right? I mean, sure I think about them, sometimes, but I-"

"I don't want to do this." Mira shoved him of then, turning to walk off. "You're being-"

"I'm sorry." He wouldn't let her go then. He had her. He'd been trying since that day out with Freed and his 'date' to get her again and now he finally did. She was so close to breaking. He could just tell. He just had to make sure that he kept his anger down. That would ruin everything. "Mira, honest. I am. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I…I make mistakes. A lot. But demon, if you'd just give me a chance to take you somewhere to talk-"

"We're doing more than enough talking now."

"No, we're not. I just...I haven't been eating right, Mira, and I get drunk every night and there's something wrong with my washing machine-"

"What are you-"

"It turned all of my undershirts blue and-"

"Laxus, did you not separate the colors?"

"See? This is why I need you."

"You got by fine before me," she said as she only frowned at him.

"That's because Freed did my laundry, but I don't want to ask him to start again."

"Why not?"

"Because then I would look weak."

"Weaker than asking me to come back to do it?"

"Mirajane-"

"What, Laxus? You think that I'm going to come back to you just because you want me to take care of you? That's stupid."

"That's not stupid," he grumbled. "That's what a relationship is. You take care of me and I take care of you. What, Mira? You think that those are some shallow reasons? Huh? Well, guess what? I'm sure the same things that you miss me for sound just as silly. But it's true. My nails need to be cut-"

"You can do that yourself, you know."

"-I haven't felt like going out to eat, so I've only been able to cook sandwiches-"

"You don't cook sandwiches, Laxus. And you could always just make yourself something-"

"-and I an dangerously low on groceries-"

"I'm not your maid! I'm-"

"I know that, demon," he said. "But you do take care of me. And I like for you to take care of me. You've been doing it for so long now that I'm no good at doing it myself anymore. I need you, Mira. And not just for those shallow reason. Because…I love you. A lot. And you make me happy and even though you annoy the hell out of me sometimes, you're still my favorite person to be around. I just…I'm hard to get along with, I know. And I'm obnoxious and moody and I growl a lot-"

"Too much. And grunt."

"-but I really do love you. How could you ever doubt that, Mirajane? Huh? There ain't nobody else that I'd ever get this mad at and still be begging to forgive me. And that's what I want. Even if you don't wanna…date, even though I hope that you do, I want you to forgive me. Please?"

"Knock it off."

"No." He only frowned. "I've spent two weeks, Mirajane, stewing over at my house, mad at you and what happened and thinking up all the reasons why it was a good thing. Why we needed to break up. But when I saw you, there in the restaurant, there was nothing I want more than for you to have been the one to summon me there. For it to have been you that wanted to see me. So that we could just make up and go back to normal. It's easy to stay mad. It's very easy. But I don't want to. And something tells me that you don't either."

When she only stared at him, he smiled, finally, truly.

"So let me take you out to dinner, huh? And we can talk?" He slowly moved to cup her cheek. "And if things don't get all worked out, they don't get all worked out. But if they do, well, I just really hope that they do."

She still pulled away from him though before turning to walk off. "Just drinks. That's all."

He was all smiles though as he headed after her. "Sounds perfect."

"Oh, Mira and Laxus! Were we late?"

Not again. The man only groaned as someone came rushing down the street towards them.

"Oh no," Wendy said as she came to stop in front of them. "Did you guys already make up? I wanted to be a part of it."

"If you hadn't taken so long getting ready," Carla quipped as she stood next to the girl, "then we would have been here."

"We're not-" Mira started, but Laxus only frowned at them.

"You guys are in on it, huh?" he asked. "That stupid plot or whatever?"

"We were just trying to help you," Wendy said, grinning at him regardless of his tone. "You guys did so much for us that-"

"I know, Wendy," Mira said with a frown. "About the tea."

"The tea?"

"Oh, you do?" Carla nodded. "Then you know, Laxus, that you still owe me-"

"Yeah, yea. I don't have time for this."

"What tea?" Wendy asked with a frown. "Carla-"

But Laxus had Mirajane by the arm then, dragging her off and he was thankful to find that she wasn't pulling away. Just allowing herself to be taken along.

"That was rude, dragon."

"Yeah, but-" He kept walking, but did stop talking as he glanced back at her.

Dragon?

"You shouldn't be rude to Wendy. She's a lot younger than you. You should be a role model, if anything."

He was still stuck on the dragon thing.

Were drinks even necessary then? If she was calling him that? He was pretty sure not. And, as they passed every café in the area as well as the bars and Laxus just led her straight to his apartment, Mirajane said nothing in protest.

The person that they found outside his door, however, had a few things to say.

"Laxus," was the first thing. "Since when have you changed your locks?"

The man frowned. "Since you kept breaking in, Freed. And what are you doin'-"

"Mirajane." The letter mage, who had been sitting with his back against Laxus' front door, got to his feet then. "Are the two of you- Did things go well?"

"Go well with what?" Laxus wasn't letting him off the hook.

"Huh?"

"You asked if something went well," Laxus repeated. "What do you mean?"

"W-Well-"

"Erza's looking for you," Mirajane said simply, finished with the whole thing then. "And we want you to go down to the restaurant, to make sure that Natsu and Gray didn't too much damage."

"Restaurant?"

"Stop playing, Freed," Laxus grumbled. "And I don't take kindly to my body guards running from fights."

"I didn't run from a fight! Erza has gone mad. All I did was suggest that perhaps you were better off not-" He caught himself before bowing his head. "I should not speak on it now. I came here to comfort you after the plan went south, but apparently it has taken. I will go now to deal with the aftermath, as you have suggested."

As he headed off, Mirajane only looked to Laxus.

"He's so weird."

"Yeah."

"But endearing."

Grunt. He was working on getting his keys out of his pocket then. "Come on."

Inside, Mirajane found the result of her not being around for two weeks, i.e. Laxus had managed to trash the place. There were beer cans and liquor bottles littering the floor along with those blue undershirts he was talking about before.

It was more cute than annoying for some reason, but that was just probably because she hadn't been around him for a few days.

"You want something to drink?" he asked as she just stood there, looking around. Then he noticed the couch. "Oh. Yeah. Here, let me clean that off, huh?"

It was covered with just as many bottles and cans as everywhere else. He hadn't been having a good past few days.

After knocking those to the floor, he motioned for Mirajane to take a seat before heading off to get them something to drink.

When he returned, she didn't look as happy anymore. There'd been too many interruptions. He would have to start from the beginning again. Great.

"So," he began as he took his seat next to her, passing off a beer to the woman first. "Uh-"

"You invited me over to talk," she said. "And you have nothing to say?"

"Actually," he corrected, "I invited you  _out_  to talk. I said nothing about coming here."

"You took me here."

"I'm quite the gambler these days, Mira."

"Right."

He relaxed some on the couch. "I had a whole thing going there, back on the sidewalk. I lost it though, once we got here. Uh, what was I going on about? Do you remember?"

"Not really."

"It's those idiots," he grumbled. "They screwed me up. Bothering me and-"

"They're not idiots," she told him tersely. "They're our friends. And do you know how much they must care about us? Huh? To put together that?"

"Not much," he told her. "That was horrible. They all are horrible. And they did a horrible job. I mean, did they think that all of that would just be coincidental and-"

"They were trying to show us how grateful they were, Laxus," she said. "We fixed their relationships and they-"

"How many times do I have to say that most of those were bull? Huh? I got Carla to go out with the other cat, I got Gajeel and Levy to originally go out together by promising them a concert, I-"

"But we still helped," she argued with a frown. "We did. I did."

"Mirajane-"

"I did. I helped Natsu and Lucy-"

"They're idiots. They would have gotten back together even if you didn't- Don't start that. I'm not insulting you, demon," he insisted as she started to tear up and try to get to her feet. "It's just the truth. That was the problem. I was lying to you before. Doing things behind your back. Keeping secrets. That was wrong. It was making a joke of everything. I'm sorry."

Mirajane wouldn't look at him then though. "Did I help anyone? I mean, were Lisanna and Bickslow at least-"

"I had nothing to do with that." That was the truth. "At all."

"See? Then I helped-"

"But," he added because, well, if they were being honest, they needed to really be honest. "They were faking on their own. They wanted to play therapy with us or something." Taking in her look, he added, "That Pantherlily thing though? All you. Seriously, demon. You did that one good. And this Gray and Juvia stuff-"

"They weren't really together. Remember? He threw her off and-"

"You just didn't have a chance to-"

"I thought you said that you would stop lying to me?"

He sighed. "It's just so hard. You're so cute and I hate seeing you all sad."

"Shut up, Laxus."

"It's true." He shifted on the couch to stare at her, ignoring the fact that she wouldn't give him even a glance. "I love you and like seeing you happy. That's my flaw. But don't let it be fatal. We were fine before we started this counseling garb. So let's just put it behind us and-"

"This is my dream, Lax. This is-"

"No, silly, it's not." He even shook his head. "It's your fixation for the moment. Obsession and love are different. You don't love doing this. You're obsessed with it. And that doesn't last. And, during the moments that I wasn't hating you and hoping we never spoke again-"

"Why would you even mention-"

"-I was thinking up things to replace it," he told her. "And your enjoyment of this comes mostly from your love of, well, watching love. You're a romantic. Okay. That just means you need something else romantic to replace it."

"Like what?"

"I'm thinking romance novels or something," he told her with a shrug. "But not this. I mean, do you really like counseling people more than you like me? I thought, demon, that the enjoyment of it came mostly from the two of us getting to spend time together. Does it not? We can do other things together."

She frowned. "How can we read together?"

"Well, that's the thing," he said before getting to his feet and heading out of the room. When he returned, he had a book in his hand. "We can read, uh, more adult ones and-"

"No thanks."

"Mira, it's got what I like and what you-"

"We're not doing that."

"Fine." He huffed and tossed the book down on the coffee table. "But we're not counseling people anymore. That's final."

"Laxus, we didn't come here to talk about that. We came to talk about whether or not we're going to be together and-"

"Demon, you came to my apartment." He raised an eyebrow. "How much more together do we have to be? We're together. I thought that was obvious."

"No, it-"

"Do you not forgive me?" he asked, coming to sit down once more, closer that time. "Mirajane?"

"You said that you wanted to sleep with-"

"I'm sorry. I don't know what else you want me to say. I'm so sorry. I've been a jerk for so long that sometimes it pops back up. That's all."

When he saw Mirajane swallow so heavily after that, he thought that it would be because she was deciding on whether or not to forgive him. Instead, she said something entirely different.

"Do you forgive me?"

"Eh?" He frowned. "What are you-"

"About what I said. About that…perfect guy I described. That upset you a lot," she said, glancing at him. "And I wasn't very kind about it either, when I saw how upset it made you. I'm sorry, Laxus, but sometimes I just get-"

"Of course I forgive you!" His frown didn't fade. "Why wouldn't I? It's just that sometimes I'd like you to say sorry." Was that asking too much? He was afraid it was. Or that it would sound chickish. He didn't wanna come off like a woman. "Err, I mean-"

"I should," she agreed softly. "I treat you badly sometimes. I take for granted that you care about me and will just do whatever I want. I knew, deep down, that you weren't enjoying taking people out. And I was making you foot the bill. I just-"

"It's alright. It-"

"No, Lax, it's not." She was moving closer to him then. "And I truly am sorry. Me and you aren't just a given. I should work at it just as hard as you."

"You should," he agreed before leaning down to brush his lips against hers. Then he said, "But you're wrong about one thing."

"Huh?"

With a grin, he said simply, "We are very much so a given."

* * *

"I know. What if we pretend to be married and drive Mira so crazy that she falls back on Laxus?"

"Meh."

"Or what if we follow them around to see if Laxus is cheating and completely sabotage it with the other woman if he is?"

"I feel like that would blow up in our faces."

Bickslow huffed. "Well, Lissy, if you're not going to agree to any of these-"

"What are you two going on about?" Evergreen came to sit down at their table. "I hear that that stupid plan that you all insisted that Elf and I couldn't be a part of was a disaster."

"We didn't come up with crap," Bickslow said to which Lisanna nodded. "We were just helping things along."

"Yeah, we had nothing to do with that."

Gajeel, from where he was sitting at a nearby table, snorted loud enough for them to hear. "Are you dummies serious?"

"Leave them alone, Gajeel." Levy, who was sitting with him, had her nose buried in a book, licking her wounds from that terrible fiasco the day before. "Just sit here quietly and be glad that Kinana's working."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lisanna sent them a glare.

"That you don't work well, I think, Lissy," Bickslow said.

"You spent all off the other day fooling around in a closet with him," Gajeel growled. "What do you think it means?"

"Least I don't come up with defunct plans."

That made the slayer glare. "Look, you little-"

"I thought yesterday went great," Natsu said from his own table. "Really."

"And how," Lucy complained from her spot next to him, "would you figure that?"

"I got to beat the crap outta Gray-"

"No," came a complained form yet another table. "You didn't, flame brain."

"Uh, yeah, I did. And I'll do it again if you don't-"

"Maybe," Erza intervened as she sat next to Gray, "you both could just be quiet."

"You sure are in a sour mood," Happy grumbled from his spot in Lucy's lap.

"And you are not?"

"He is," Lucy sighed. "For some reason he thought that he'd capitalize off the plan and somehow get another date with Carla."

"Awe, little buddy," Natsu said, glancing down at him. "You knew that was crazy."

"Not as crazy as Juvia," Gray grumbled to which Erza only shook her head. "I had to spend the whole rest of the day explaining to her that we weren't really dating."

"Oh? And you think you have it bad?" Erza snorted. "I spent the day tracking Freed only to never be able to find him."

"If you wanted a fight, Erza, you could've came to me." Natsu pumped his fist. "I know! Let's-"

"No."

"But-"

"No." Erza shook her head. "I spent the rest of the night with an overly drunk Cana. Why did anyone ever get her involved? Or inebriated? It makes no sense."

"I've found that most of the things we do as a group don't," Lucy sighed.

It was about then though that the guildhall doors opened and Mirajane walked in. That wouldn't have been too interesting, had it not been arm in arm with Laxus.

"Hey." Everyone else, but Natsu was speechless as he ran over to the couple. "We did get you guys back together! You're welcome. You should fight me in return, Laxus."

The slayer had been laughing and talking to his demon before, but at the sight of the Salamander, he only frowned. Then he reached out and patted the guy on the shoulder.

He was that jolly.

Bickslow, not buying it, got to his feet, dragging Lisanna along, off to hide in the closet. Clearly, the boss had lost it.

Then Laxus spoke.

"If you don't get away from me and my woman, Natsu," he said as the pat on the shoulder turned into a vice like grip. "I'll rip your head off. And that goes double for you other idiots. Don't mettle in my life. Ever again. Else I'll show you how much stronger the Thunder Palace has become and down this whole damn guild. You idiots. How dare you-"

"Behave." Mira put a hand on Laxus' arm. "Dragon."

And there it was. What they were missing those past few weeks. Laxus only released Natsu before turning to walk over to a table by himself and sit down.

It hadn't felt that good to have things back to normal in a long time.

As all the women rushed over to the bar to talk to Mirajane and get the info, Gajeel only shook his head as Lily snickered form his spot on the table with the slayer.

"We're in a guild full of morons," he told his kitty who only nodded.

"Perhaps," he agreed. "But those same morons did get you involved with Levy, roundabout as it might be."

And as Gajeel glanced over at where she was sitting then, at the bar with Lucy and the others, he had to nod slightly. He could hear, even from where he was, Mirajane making her retirement speech from counseling. It almost made him grin.

"Yeah," he said. "I guess they did.

"But," Mirajane was keeping up from the bar as the others listened. "Laxus has agreed that I'm pretty good at my guitar and he's going to be buying me some new gear. He thinks I should get more back into that."

"Really?" Lucy, who had heard Laxus complain before to Lisanna that, though Mira had a nice voice, he didn't enjoy her singing near as much as he pretended to, frowned. "Laxus said this?"

"Yep. He says he loves my music."

And over at his table, Laxus only put on his headphones and put his head down as he waited for the demon to bring him his beer.

So maybe being completely truthful wasn't being utilized yet. It probably never would be either.

"I'm glad to see you are here, Laxus," Freed greeted as he came into the bar. Erza was so preoccupied over at the bar that she didn't even notice. Lucky him. "How did things go last night?"

He only grinned at the other man. He'd had a beer or two in him at that point and was still riding high.

"I took a woman home with me, Freed," he said. "What? You think I've lost my touch? That I can't seal a deal anymore?"

"N-No, but-"

"Me and the demon just needed a little space," he told the other man. "And a reevaluation. We're a given, man. We're a given."

And as much as he hated to say it, the words made Freed grin.

"It is good to hear that," he told him. "Very, very good."

"Hear what?" Mirajane was coming over with Freed's standard drink without him even ordering it. "Did Laxus tell you?"

"Tell me what?" Freed asked as the slayer frowned some.

"Uh, Freed, Mirajane's decided that, well, she's no good at counseling, really," the man said slowly, "but that her matchmaking skills are at least standard, so-"

"Don't worry, Freed." Mirajane patted him on the head even before heading off. "I'll find you the perfect person. I promise!"

After she was gone, Freed just looked to his idol.

"Uh, Laxus-"

"I can't break her heart more than once a night, man," he sighed. "You understand."

"No, I don't. Why did you not just include match making in the conversation and-"

"Just a few dates, huh?"

"A few? Laxus-"

"You owe me." He gave him a long stare. "You nearly ruined me and the demon, Freed. So you're doing this."

Of course he was doing it. And suddenly, his grin over the two of them being reunited wasn't as big.

"She's going to ruin my life, isn't she?"

Laxus only shrugged a little. "Just for a week or two. Or hey, maybe she'll find you the perfect…person."

How could she when she was dating that person?

"Maybe," Freed sighed. "Or maybe you'll make me to pretend to enjoy someone to make her feel better and then the two of you will become a match making service and you will be even more miserable."

Blinking, Laxus thought for a moment before shrugging. "Yeah, well, you know. Things happen."

"Yes," Freed agreed as he glanced over at where Mira was behind the bar, happily speaking to Lucy and Levy. "They do."

And sometimes, a dragon overindulges a demon to the point of insanity. Honestly, at that point, none of them should expect anything less.

Then, in a rare moment of clarity (getting back with the demon had him that off base), Laxus said, "I just care about her, man."

"You," Freed said slowly, "love her."

"Yeah." Laxus even grinned, not letting on to Freed that Erza was craftily making her way over to the table, no doubt to attack him. "I love her."

He did. And that alone allowed for maybe just a little hiding of the truth.

Just a little.

 


End file.
